1. Retrain your self-talk, to remove selfish from your vocabulary and replace it with self-care. In order for you to take care of the people you love you need to take care of yourself first. Friends, family, loved ones look to you as a model, make sure to model self-care, taking time to play, relax, and read. This is especially important for parents; this will give your children the confidence to have the same healthy behaviors. 2. Give yourself time for delays and unexpected events. When mapping out your day add an extra hour cushion to your schedule. This extra time will keep you stress free and running on time if some of your appointments are delayed, or if you run into someone you haven't seen in a while, so you can enjoy a spontaneous conversation without the guilt of running behind schedule. 3. Balance out your commitments. A great way to cut down on a hectic schedule is to balance out all new activities by removing an old activity. Don't add anything new, work, classes, volunteer activities, etc unless you first remove something from your schedule to balance it out. This will help you to let go of projects and time wasters that no longer serve you. 4. No is not a bad word, in fact, it's not only a complete sentence it's a great stress reducing word. There is no need to justify or explain when you say no to someone's request. Just give them a friendly smile thank them for including you and tell them you can't do it this time. If you are having trouble getting used to saying no right away, tell the person you need some time to think about it, then call them later and decline to be involved this time. 5. Maximize your commute and errands. If you have errands to run for business or home combine them to one trip. Make doctor’s appointments for yourself or your family members back to back and see if you can get appointments first thing in the morning before the doctor is running behind. Order you business supplies online to save time, most business supply websites can store your most frequently ordered purchases in a file so all you have to do is select the item you want and have it delivered with just one click. 6. Improve your home environment one room at a time. Even if you have the budget for a complete makeover, remodeling and redecorating can be very time consuming and stressful projects. Try working on just one room at a time. Pick a few rooms in your house that you enjoy the most and spend most of your time in when your home. Select your favorite and create an environment that is pleasing to the eye and gives you comfort and positive energy. This will give you a haven in your home and the encouragement to tackle another room when you're ready. 7. Being spontaneous is a very exhilarating feeling that gives you a real sense of freedom. Make sure to leave time in your life every week to be spontaneous. Cutting things out of your life that are time zappers and stressful will also give you the energy to be spontaneous. Keep at least two weekends a month free from scheduled activities. Then you can decide to take a short trip, have a date with your partner, a special family event, or kick your feet up and do absolutely nothing and feel wonderful about it. 8. Highlight those time wasters. Instead of just making up another long to do list so you can beat your self up about all the things you didn't and couldn't possible have accomplished in one day. Make a realistic to do list. Put the things that are most important to YOU on the top, then next to each item list the amount of time you think it will take to get it done. This will help you get your important things done and show you where your time wasters are. 9. Under promise and over deliver. This is very useful in business and in your life. By selecting reasonable deadlines you avoid the stress of crunch time, use your time effectively and you will be able to finish ahead of schedule giving you satisfaction for a job well done and turned in early. 10. Define what life and work without stress would look like to you. Describe what your ideal schedule is, what leisure activities you want to do and who you want to spend time with. By creating a detailed image of what a stress free schedule looks like, you can begin to take the steps necessary to clearing out the stress.
Imagine that each person on this planet carried with them a teaspoon of soil or rock from Mt. Everest. Certainly Mt. Everest would shrink! Those individual teaspoons of material from the tallest mountain on Earth now in the pockets of billions of people also wouldn't mean much. Well I suppose each of us could put that small amount of mineral material into a bottle and keep it as a souvenir. But like most souvenirs we collect, we tire of dusting them and they become added to the already crowded drawer or box of meaningless, useless items. A teaspoon of dirt, in a jar, in a drawer, that by itself, means little. But, wait a minute…. What about it's P-0-T-E-N-T-I-A-L? From Webster's Dictionary: "Contribute": to give or supply in common with others What if each person on this planet brought their teaspoon of Mt. Everest to the site where it used to stand and contributed it? What would happen? Why, we would build the highest, mightiest mountain on Earth…TOGETHER. Good thought. Doubtful it would happen. Why not? Let's explore that. We can start by applying this Mt. Everest metaphor to our own lives. Modern times finds we human beings have, at least in the developed world, become rather insular (just think of the word "insulate"). We cocoon in our homes. We don't have time, we don't have enough money, we are tired. We don't have any time to ourselves, we go to work and slave for someone else's goals and often receive a pay cheque for much less than we feel we are worth. We provide for our families, do the myriad of tasks and chores in and for the home. Sacrifice for and fearfully protect our children. We amass debt to do many of these things. We feel trapped in a vortex of stress. And yet, with all this striving for what we think we want, if we are honest, we still feel unfulfilled and probably guilty for feeling that way! Something elusive is still missing. We are living our "separateness". We are not acknowledging our "interconnectedness". We avoid asking ourselves "Who am I, why am I really here?" because we already know that we don't know or are afraid the answers will jolt us out of what we think is our comfort zone. Finding out may take more of that precious time we don't' have or take more of that effort we are too tired to perform! It's one of those conundrums: we want to know, but we don't want to know because it may shake up our lives, it may cause our lives to….here it comes…..CHANGE! And human beings don't like change, yet it is the one thing we can all count on. So there we are, unfulfilled vs. having to change. Yup, it's scary. But so worth it! Have you ever listened to Nelson Mandela, Deepak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, Mother Theresa, the Dali Lama or so many other highly spiritually evolved human beings? And I mean really listened to them? Would you say all of them know "who" they are? And are they living their purpose, their passion? Of course. We can 'feel' that they are. All of them have their roots in different countries, all of them teach the same message, which is, we are all interconnected. We were not put on this earth to be separate, we are all teaspoons of the Whole. And the way we can come together and build a "Mt. Everest" world of harmony is through contribution. We likely think of ways in which to contribute as the usual volunteering our time or donating our money. Heck, we receive unsolicited begging for money via telemarketing phone calls and the postal system on an endless basis! Of course charitable organizations do need our donations of time and money, but there is another, more intangible way to "add your teaspoon". It is through fulfilling your life's Purpose. This means: Living life intentionally, not by accident Capturing the essence of what it means to be fully alive You have a powerful direction in your life You make choices that increase the value of life to yourself and others Being fulfilled today and every day Living your life based on your values Due to our spiritual interconnectedness, there is no true life Purpose that does not include contribution. And there is no contribution that does not include reward for you, tangible or intangible. You are here to make a difference on this planet. Wouldn't you like to know what you will leave behind, the difference you will make in the lives of those you touch? Your life Purpose is an underlying theme to your life, not a specific job, parenting or partnering. Your Purpose can be fulfilled through these, but it is not these. Your life Purpose is not to be a title, it is to do something, something that contributes. Never underestimate your power, your "teaspoon" has the potential to become Mt. Everest! You can be fulfilling your life Purpose with as little as an acknowledgment, a warm touch, a phone call, a letter, a kind smile or word, lending an ear, anything that contributes to the mental, physical or emotional well being of another living soul. Or conversely, refraining from judgment, harsh words within or without the presence of the target, anything that you know, deep in your heart, would be hurtful to another. The special wording of your purpose is uniquely yours. Certain words have specific meaning to each of us. When you speak your purpose, something physical happens to you, you know this is you. Others hearing it may not feel that power, because it is not theirs, but it is not meant to impress anyone else, it is the Universe speaking to your heart and that is all that matters. Who Lynn is and what I am here to do is the following: "I am a strong and free woman, leading people to discover their true value" When I say this I feel an angel kiss my forehead, my heart is full and I have such a peace and understanding. And even better, I know I am contributing to the lives of others. Up to now, I have been fulfilling my life Purpose to about 80% potential in the career aspect of my life. It is through Personal Life Coaching that I know I am fulfilling my life's Purpose 100%. I know the potential of my 'teaspoon' and through my Purpose I hope to touch as many lives as I can reach to enable them to know their potential as well. You are not separate, you are connected, just Plug in with a Purpose!
We’ve all done it at some time or other. We put off our exercise routine until tomorrow; we continually delay finishing that project or starting that business. Procrastination is the mother of all demons and can literally stop you in your tracks from achieving all that you desire. Sandra Baptist provides you with 5 effective processes you can use to slay this giant. 1. Do it now Hold your breath and jump right in! Putting things off until the last minute is a bad habit and like all habits is ingrained in our subconscious mind and hard to break. It feels like the normal thing to do and we simply continue along our path. To complete a task immediately may even feel strange or like a forced action. When your boss gives you a task or when your clients or customers request your expertise, do it right away! You not only look well-organized to others, the feeling that the job is done, is complete before the deadline, will be one of relief and gratitude. How would this efficiency look to your customers when you request a referral or to your boss when salary reviews are approaching? I would think, “Great”. 2. Take baby steps Sometimes we procrastinate because the task may be intimidating to us. Perhaps we have no possible inkling on where to start. In these cases, it is quite fine to take it one step at a time. Say you are preparing a business plan and for the 5th time this week, you’ve turn on the PC and looked at the blank screen. Or you’ve just remembered you need to do some more research before you begin…you’re still not ready. My friend you ARE ready. You simply need to break down the project into smaller pieces and tackle each bit separately. Make each task an individual project and after completion of each one, celebrate and acknowledge your achievement. Soon you’ll be finished and have no idea why you were putting it off in the first place! 3. Vision the perfect Ah! I love this one. I use the Law of Attraction with my clients to have them easily and effortlessly achieve their dreams and desires and in effect, their vision. Once you are aware that you are in fact procrastinating, creating a vision of you achieving the perfect plan is extremely helpful. When you create a vision you write in the present tense…as if you have already achieved your goal or if you are in the process of completing it. For example, we go back to the business plan. Your vision may look something like this. “I am so grateful that I have completed all the research I need for my business plan. I am finding the information easily using the internet. People that have written business plans are offering me advice that allows me to create an exciting plan that I resonate with. As I write, the words come to me effortlessly….” In creating a vision and focusing on it daily, the universal laws state that things, people, processes will begin to occur in your life that will allow you to attract that vision. 4. Forget it Why force the issue? If you have been ‘dragging your feet’ on something for a very long time, it may all be for the best. Something, somewhere is trying to tell you something. That something is your intuition and it is usually right! Think about something that you have been putting off again and again and again. What are the reasons that you need to complete this task in the first place? Does someone want you to do this? What is THEIR agenda? What are YOUR reasons for this lengthy delay? I find it amazing that 99% of the time I put off doing something, I am thankful that I did! Disregarding a project after a long period of procrastination is however usually a last resort. 5. Support team Do you put off tasks because you feel that there are too big and complex for you to handle alone? Or because you need assistance? Be honest with yourself. “No man is an island”. Ask for help! There are many resources out there that can provide you with all you need to carry out your job. If you’re a solo-professional and you put off answering emails, then don’t answer them yourself. Hire an assistant, find some college students that want experience, get a family member to help. Procrastinating on life changing activities could be as a result of fear of the unknown. Get a mastermind group together, find a mentor, join a support group. You don’t have to do it all by yourself. Just ensure that to kick this habit; you do what feels good to you in whatever method you choose. You’ll surely postpone procrastination for a very long time.
I recently spoke to a Youth Leadership Group, and I was deeply inspired listening to the dreams that the teenagers had for the future. While I was presenting, I felt the group of teenagers begin to realize that it is ok to dream and be proud of what you have done in your life and where you want to go in life. As adults, we need to realize that the power of a dream will enable you to achieve whatever your ultimate "WHY" in life is. By the age 25, most people lose all of their dreams and fall into a rut. From the age 25-65, people generally go back and forth to work and say to themselves," I wish...if only I could have...if only I knew then what I know now," and numerous other lamentations as to why they do not feel fulfilled in life. The key in life to feeling fulfilled is to simply listen to your inner spirit and make your daily work in life something that you love to do and will help you achieve your DREAMS! The key word in that sentence is DREAMS! Too many people when asked, "Where do you see yourself 2-5 years from now" give the answer, "Just let me make it to this weekend." The underlying reason that they don’t know where they are going to be is because they have no dreams. This can be extremely frightening! Each of the teenagers that I spoke to this week has dreams for their life and where they see themselves in the future. As a professional speaker and business coach, my ultimate outcome is to empower people to find their WHY in life -- to catapult them to attain their dreams in life. I also spoke to the group about how important it is to be around a mastermind team, which will push you on and let you know it is awesome you have a dream. As an overall population, over 95% of adults have no mastermind team but they have group of so-called friends, who will tell every reason why they should never try to win and to just accept their life. You need to stop right now and take a personal inventory of your life and ask yourself three life-changing questions: 1) WHAT is my WHY in LIFE!!! (Why I am getting up each and every day?) 2) WHO is my Mastermind Team? 3) WHERE do I see myself 2-5 years from now? When you answer these questions you need to be honest with yourself and tell yourself the truth because the truth shall set you FREE! The key to living a fulfilled life is waking up each day with a driving desire to achieve your "WHY”. The key to winning in life is to be part of a winning team and realize life decisions are challenging but very beneficial. Bring your Dreams back to life! Find your WHY & FLY! John Di Lemme FindYourWhy
I’ve been thinking a lot about what I believe to be the central challenge facing our society today. It’s not an original concept by any means, but more and more I come to believe that it is the key to unlocking every success principle in existence. Discipline. Discipline may seem like an odd thing to emphasize - but I see the results of real discipline every day. I also see the results of the lack of discipline every day. Here’s what I mean: Think about anyone who you would consider to have “made it”. You know the person - the woman who is the number one producer in your office and also has a family that loves her and is very close. Maybe you think of the guy who consistently outperforms everyone else and still has time to take numerous vacations AND train for a marathon. Perhaps you are envisioning the manager who genuinely loves developing the team and does a great job of it. Maybe you are considering your own track record right now. Whomever the example, picture clearly why they popped into your mind as an example of success. Now, if you watched that person very carefully, I guarantee you that you will see that nearly everything they do is purposeful, focused and disciplined. They are disciplined about setting goals and achieving them. They are disciplined about maintaining a great attitude, and they’re likely very disciplined about how they use their time. You’ll notice that when it’s time to work, that individual WORKS - so that when it’s time to play they can do so freely and without baggage. On the other hand, consider the individual who perpetually seems to get the short end of the stick. You may know someone who is extremely intelligent, or is very positive and upbeat, or perhaps has a great sense of humor and everyone loves them. Everyone either knows somebody or is somebody who seems like they should be extremely successful in Life, but for some reason they just keep struggling and scraping by. If you watch that person very carefully, the underlying cause is almost always a lack of discipline - about Goals, about their Attitude, about how they use their Time, or about how they communicate - or maybe all of the above. Either way, I notice more and more that the most frequently occurring theme in the lives of truly successful men and women is the theme of discipline. As Albert Gray says in The Common Denominator of Success, they have “formed the habit of doing what unsuccessful people don’t like to do”. They are motivated by pleasing results rather than just pleasing activities. In other words, they are disciplined. So then what I got thinking about was the question: “What is discipline?” Well, I had heard once before that the word discipline has the same root as the word disciple. As in “a follower”. Now I didn’t want to get all super-religious or cultish on anyone, so I started thinking about what it actually means to be a disciple. I couldn’t really put my finger on it until recently when the answer was physically handed to me in church. The sermon was called “Majoring in the Minors” and the notes at the bottom read as follows: “…a disciple is one who stays focused on what really matters, and is careful about letting other less important issues or concerns get in the way.” Says it all, really. Again, I’m not trying to create some Cult of Personality here. I just encourage you as you begin this day, this week, this month, Your Life - stay focused on what really matters to you - at Work and in Life. Be careful about letting less important issues or concerns get in the way. I urge you…be a disciple of your own success.
The minute you set a goal, you are creating a 'mini crisis' in your mind. You're telling your mind about a journey you are considering. In simple terms you are stating where you want to be in relation to where you are. And in between these two is a chasm, a gap. As far as your mind is concerned, the ability to achieve your stated goal is mostly dependent on your mental qualities and skills. Selfish mind, right? Maybe not, but the point is, this is the area on which your success hinges. So, here are the mental qualities you need to optimise your success. a. concentration b. emotional balance c. imagery and d. perspective Lets take a look at these in detail. a. Concentration Concentration is a process of paying atttention to certain things to the eclusion of others. The beautiful thing about it is that it is easy to concentrate. Simple! Focus on your goal, and all the unnecessary distractions drop out of your attention span naturally. This means you do not have to worry or focus on getting rid of the distractions. I have heard it said that 'where thought is directed, energy flows'. WORD OF CAUTION: Do not concentrate so intensely to the extent that you lose sight of the bigger picture. Focus, but e aware of what's changing around as far as your goal is concerned. b. Emotional Balance Emotional balance refers to how well you juggle too much effort (mental and physical) and too much relaxation. You do not want to be so focused, you experience burn-out along the way. And you do not want to take things so easy, you lose momentum! How much are you prepared to put into those activities that help you achieve your goal, and what is hte effort required? I suppose its much helpful to exert and relax adequately, stretch anc take a break! c. Imagery This is one critical quality that conventional methods of goal setting gloss over. Rich imagery is central to the mental fqualities you require to optimise your success. What do I mean by 'rich imager'? Rich imagery is made up of the qualities in your pictures, feelings and sounds. These qualities combine in different ways to enhance your images. Here is a quick sampling of these qualities, referred to as submodalities in Neurolinguistic Programming Submodalities for picture would be brightness, contrast and shade. Submodalities for feeling would be texture, temperature, hardness and softness. And submodalities for sound would be volume, rhythm, timbre and tone These submodalities make the imagery you choose to use, more effective. And you can adjust them as you want, to create a more richer experience. In goal setting, imagery is used to precreate the achieved goal in your mind. Just like a dress rehearsal. If you can see it, you can have it! To make the most of imagery - be aware of the sounds, pictures, and feelings - make them as clear and as vivid as possible - add and adjust submodalities according to your preferences. The richer the better. - immerse yourself in the experience d. Perspective The world you live in is a system. One thing that you are doing right now has far reaching implications than you may be aware of. And on top of that, you are being affected by a myriad of influences you may not be aware of. What does this have to do with goal setting? While you are going for your goal, concentrating intensely (I hope), maintaining the right emotional balance, and using imagery effectively, keep checking how your world is changing and how you are moving towards the future you are attempting to create. It will be a disaster to try to do one good thing (setting your goals properly), only to spoil your efforts by pretending to be living in a vacuum. There you have it folks, now you know the prerequisite qualities for optimum success in goal getting. Now, before you expend any effort in chasing your passion and goal, do a quick check to see if you mentally have what it takes to get there.
There’s been a lot written about goal setting and there are many different approaches and methods in fact, it’s easy to get caught up in the confusion about how to set goals and not end up setting any. These simple steps will help you to set powerful goals and make goal-setting an invaluable part of your life. You’ll be amazed at what you can achieve with the help of some well though-out, written goals try it! Make a date. Make time in your diary to find a quiet, comfortable location to set your goals. I spend a morning at my favourite table in the tearoom of the Sheraton on the Park (a beautiful hotel in Sydney city) in January every year to review my goals and set new ones for the year ahead. Take five. Create five categories for which to set goals: physical, educational, spiritual, financial, relational. By setting goals for each of these areas of your life, you will be taking a balanced approach and not neglecting any important aspects of your life. Write it. You must write your goals down it makes them more powerful. Use positive language words like I will and I am this will help you to feel as though you have already achieved your goals and to change your behaviours accordingly, for example, I am going to the gym three times per week. Make sure you allocate a specific timeframe for the completion of each goal, for example, By the beginning of March, I am going to the gym three times per week. Now, identify a reward for achieving each goal don’t just make a list of rewards, relate a specific reward to the achievement of a specific goal. This will inspire you even more toward the achievement of your goal. And finally, list the possible obstacles that will get in the way of you achieving each goal, and how you will overcome these. This will help you to pre-empt the things that might go wrong and immediately swing into action with your solution, rather than giving up on your goal. Share. Make yourself accountable to someone you trust. Share your goals with them and ask them to check in with you regularly to see whether you are on track, and if not, why not. Review constantly. I have been told that the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire is that a billionaire reads their goals twice a day. Simple really. I keep a copy of my goals in several locations around my house (on the bathroom mirror, on the printer, outside the shower screen, on the fridge, on my bedside table and in my wallet), which makes it easy for me to see my goals and be reminded of what I am working towards several times a day. Keep track. When you return to your favourite place next year, review your progress and take the time to feel proud of those goals you achieve before you move on to setting goals for the next year.
Some may think that the change from paucity or ‘the norm’ to abundant prosperity is a mysterious and miraculous leap brought on by fate or fortune. It is not. It is, in 99% of the cases, a step-by-step and conscious following of an envisioned and intentional path; it is a proven formula. The formula is repeated on almost every page of the Prosperity Paradigm Website. It is stated simply as Purpose + Passion + Persistence = Prosperity. It may sound simple. It may even, for most, be something too simple to seem real. It is, however, the path that all those who achieve the prosperity they dream and desire, walk step-by-step. The lover of math in me likes to define it as 3p=P. If you critically examine the lives of most people, you will see that they wander through life without (a defined) purpose. It is the rare individual who can tell you in a short paragraph immediately when asked, What is the purpose of your life? Even amongst those who can answer, the response most give is usually some vague and hollow repetition of some assumed or inherited survival, societal or spiritual meme. It is meaningless drivel. It is the truly rare and almost inevitably successful and happy individual who will be able to state succinctly and definitely what the real and tangible purpose of their life is. Their defined purpose may not seem all that important to you. That matters not a whit. It only matters to that person that it has value; more, that it has an all-consuming importance. If you do not know what your real (self-assigned) purpose is, then the first and most critical step on your path to real and lasting prosperity (and happiness) is to define your purpose. Only you can do that for yourself. Any purpose assigned to your by parents, peers or societal expectations is false. It will not, therefore, bear the fruit you desire success and fulfillment, i. e. prosperity, which is the having of an abundance of ALL things held ideal in mind and dear in heart. It may take some critical self-examination and a great deal of personal honesty to arrive at a real, defined sense of purpose for your life. So what? What else are you doing with your life? Are you tired of being just average or unhappy; weary of merely surviving? Figure out with what purpose you journey through these few short years on planet earth. It is step one in your quest for having a meaningful and purposeful life. You, and only you, must decide and define your purpose. Then go about living your each and every day to fulfill that purpose. It is aptly called being on purpose. Ah, passion. How we soar when we have it! Remember falling in love and lusting after being with that one truly special person? Passion! How wondrous! How consuming! How addictive! How enlivening! How intense! How fulfilling! How passionate! The next step in your path to real and lasting prosperity is to become PASSIONATE about your purpose and your moment-by-moment existence. It is often called a lust for life, but it is more than that. It is a lust for the self-decided purpose of your life, AND, it is an immense gratitude for being blessed with being able to pursue that purpose. Get passionate or stay home. Without passion, life is mediocre. You have already learned that lesson, even if you deny or forget it in order to tolerate some normality or compromise. you have made to get through each day without passion. Now, here is the tough part for many, many people life will throw you curves, put up road blocks, appear to resist your journey and generally test your resolve. The majority will take these ‘obstacles’ as proof that they are mistaken in their choice of purpose and passion or that they were not destined to have the level of prosperity they desire. Those who take these ‘messages’ as lessons or as opportunities to garner more strength will be the ones who succeed. Persistence pays dividends. Huge dividends. Invest in a little persistence. Although I would like to find a way to say it better, there is no greater quote than that spoken by Calvin Coolidge, "Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent." So there we have it. The simply stated, but not so simply applied, formula for achieving the prosperity you desire 3p=P. So now you know. The only thing holding you back from having your heart’s desire is your lack of application of this one formula. It is your choice. You are totally free to choose a purpose for your life (or not). You are totally free to become passionate about life and your purpose (or not). You are totally free to desist (give up/compromise/take the easy way out) or persist. Prosperity is a matter of choice, not chance.
Smoking is believed to be 10% physical addiction and 90% psychological addiction. The nicotine withdrawals usually subside in three days or less, but the psychological dependency on smoking is much more difficult to defeat. In order to help you quit smoking, you need to do a self-analysis on the reasons you smoke and the reasons on why you want to quit smoking. The easiest way to do this is to make a list. Label one column on why you started smoking and the other column on why you want to quit smoking. In column one, list all the reasons you can remember as to why you started smoking. Was it peer pressure? Rebellion? Did you think it made you look cool? Did it make you feel like a grown-up? Really, try to remember the exact reasons why you started smoking and write them all down. Now review your list of reasons why you smoke. Do any of those reasons still apply in your life today? More than likely the reasons you started to smoke does not apply to the reasons you smoke today. If you are like most people, you will see that your reasons for becoming a smoker are no longer valid, are often just silly, and are easily outweighed by the risks to your health and your family's well-being. Now write a list on why you want to quit smoking. This one may seem obvious, but it can be a bit deceiving. You really need to take some time and think hard about this. Do not just list the obvious health reasons. You have been reading the Surgeon General's warnings for years with little effect, so you need to come up with reasons that truly have meaning for you. The most common reasons that people to quit smoking are: · I do not want to get lung cancer. · I do not want to have a heart attack or a stroke. · I would like to live long enough to see my grandchildren grow up. Certainly the list above are good reasons to quit, but the truth is, is that they are possibilities and not specifics. For example, sure, you might get lung cancer, you might have a heart attack or a stroke, and you might die young and miss seeing your grandchildren grow up, or you might not! The bottom line is that you are not going to break a psychological addiction based on what might happen to you if you continue to smoke. Your addiction to nicotine will work hard to convince you that it will not happen to you. The alternative is to list health problems that you are experiencing now. Your list should point out things in your life that you are actively unhappy about and are STRONGLY MOTIVATED to change. In order to break your psychological addiction, you need a battery of new thoughts and desires that are stronger than your desire to smoke! For example, the list below identifies that most smokers can relate to right now. Not what might be. Health Reasons · I get so out of breath when I exert myself even a little bit. Just vacuuming the house makes me pant and gasp. · My feet are always cold. This could be due to high blood pressure and poor circulation associated with smoking. · I have a nasty wet cough and I have to blow my nose excessively. Mucus build-up is the body's reaction to all the toxins and chemicals in cigarette smoke and could be a precursor to serious respiratory disease. Even if I do not get cancer, I do not want to be one of those people who have to carry an oxygen bottle. · I am always tired. Could it be that my body is using up all its energy trying to eliminate the toxins and chemicals from cigarettes? Vanity Reasons · Smoking causes premature aging and drying of the skin. I do not want to look like a wrinkled up old prune! · My fingers, fingernails and teeth are all tobacco stained. Disgusting! How embarrassing. · When I get on the elevator after a smoke break at work, everyone wrinkles their nose and tries to edge away from me because I reek of cigarette smoke. I feel like a leper. It is embarrassing to be the smelly one the elevator. I feel like I have no self-control. · My breath is awful. Kissing me must be like kissing an ashtray. I spend a fortune on breath mints. Financial Reasons · If I save all the money I used to spend on cigarettes, I will have enough to take a vacation in Cancun (or some other warm tropical place) every winter! · I could use the money to pay off my credit cards! · I could donate money to my favorite charity or sponsor a child. My cigarette money could make the world a better place! Family Reasons · My family can stop worrying about me. · My spouse will have to find something new to nag about to me. · My children will be proud of me and they will never start smoking themselves, having seen firsthand what a nasty destructive habit it is. Cleanliness Reasons · The walls used to be white. Now they are a nasty dirty-looking brown. I need to repaint... again! · I stink, my car stinks, my house stinks, everything I own reeks of cigarette smoke. I cannot even lend a book to a non-smoking friend because they cannot stand the smell of smoke permeating the pages! Do you see yourself in any of the items listed above? You may have many more reasons of your own. Write down as many compelling and emotion reasons to quit smoking as you can think of. If you can re-train your mind to think of smoking as a silly and self-destructive thing to do, then you are almost sure to succeed.
Can you guess about the future of any organization by looking at the faces of few employees and observing them for some time? I guess that you can. Let me tell you how. Any organization that is heading towards worthwhile goals shows strong enthusiasm. The leader conveys the goals to the employees and the employees feel good about working in a organization that is not heading in a wrong direction or going downhill. The leader sells that vision to the employees and looking at the employees one can find out if they feel enthusiastic working or not. If your goals are worthwhile and look attractive your employees will feel love working for the organization because they know that they will be reaching a great destination. While discussing about great goals let us quiz ourselves about the quality of the goals. The first question should be - if the top management set the goals or the common employees were involved in the process. Was goal setting a participatory process? The second question should be if the goals are realistic. Setting highly unrealistic goals may dampen the spirit because they will always look unattainable. If you set realistic but ambitious goals, you can enthuse your employees to achieve them. Regular feedback will tell your employees about how much they have achieved and if their achievements are in line with the overall growth. Goal setting and goal achievements, both require employee participation of high order. They need to feel involved and inspired. Use right techniques to set goals and you will come out as a winner.
If you’ve ever had any sales training, you’ve probably been taught the technique called "Reduction to the Ridiculous." This is the technique of breaking a price down to smaller and smaller units until it sounds insignificant compared to the value of your product. Here’s an example. Say you’re talking to an insurance agent. Nothing against insurance agents, some of them are my friends, it just makes a good example. You’re buying car insurance, and your friendly agent sees your jaw drop when he tells you the annual premium. Now he starts breaking it down - $1200 per year becomes $100 per month, which is about $3 a day, or 13 cents an hour or less than a penny a minute. Or, since he knows you drive 24,000 miles a year, your premium is only 50 cents per mile. A small price to pay to avoid a financial wipeout in case you cause an accident, right? ;-) We can apply the same technique to Success. Here’s the road map: Vision | | V Plans | | V Goals | | V Steps | | V Specific Actions Now let’s look at each step. Vision Your Vision is what your life would look like if you had everything that’s important to you. Suppose you had all the free time and money you needed to do anything you wanted. That "anything" is your Vision. In his best-seller The Greatest Networker In the World, John Fogg calls it "the movie in your mind." I love this visual, You close your eyes and imagine you are standing in front of a theatre. Picture the neon sign above the marquee. The bright lights chasing themselves around the title of the current feature. Feel the push of the crowd as they move around you to get their tickets. You check the title - "You - the True Story Of His/Her Amazing Life." With a title like that, you have to buy a ticket, right? You buy your ticket, and find a seat, about a third back, right in the center. Feel yourself sinking back into the plush velvet of the rich seat. Slide back and have some fresh popcorn. Settle in. The show starts. There you are. Now fill in the action on the silver screen. See yourself doing the things you dream of doing. When the show is over, open your eyes. You have a Vision. Plans Plans are the elements of your vision. Suppose a scene from your movie showed you presenting a large check to your favorite charity. To do so, you will need access to a large amount of money. In other words, to make that scene come true, you need to be wealthy. To reach part of your vision, you plan to Get Rich. Goals Goals are the milestones you use to measure your progress in following your plan. For our plan to Get Rich, we might set the following goals: 1. Net Worth of $10,000,000 2. Annual Income of $1,000,000 3. Enough passive and residual income to cover monthly expenses without working. 4. And so on. Many advise you to put a strict deadline on your goals. I don’t follow that, because it sets you up for failure. I would much prefer to set a target date, simply as a point of reference to evaluate progress. For the goal of $1,000,000 annual income, you might set a target of ten years. Each year, you can evaluate and ask yourself, ‘if I continue at my current pace, how likely am I to hit my target.’ If the answer is ‘very likely,’ keep the target. If the answer is ‘I’ll reach it much sooner,’ move up the date. If the answer is ‘not gonna happen’, you need to make a decision. Do you change your target date? Or do you change what you are doing in order to accelerate your progress? Do you change the goal altogether? You have to decide which way you want to go. If you think you are doing as well as you are capable of doing, go ahead and move the target date out. You’ll be evaluating again in a year, and can adjust as necessary. If you think there is room for improvement, note that and go to the next step. Steps To reach net worth of $10,000,000, you decide the steps are: > Create a business worth $5,000,000 > Use profits from the business to build a portfolio worth $2,000,000 > Use profits from the business and portfolio to acquire real estate worth $3,000,000 Let’s focus for now on "create a business worth $5,000,000". One common method for valuing a business is to multiply the yearly earnings by some factor. Let’s say that a buyer wants to recoup his investment in five years. Disregarding taxes and such, he would multiply the business’s earnings by 5 to arrive at a purchase price. So in order for our business to be valued at $5,000,000, it would have to generate $1,000,000 per year in revenue. Starting from scratch and building a million-dollar-a-year business is like eating an elephant - you have to do it one bite at a time. Let’s use a network marketing business and work the numbers backwards. I’m going to make some stuff up here, just to keep the arithmetic simple. We’re going to ignore taxes and assume perfect duplication (in other words, every member of the organization does exactly the same thing). This obviously won’t happen in real life, and it still illustrates the principle. We’re also going to assume that direct commissions and all overrides are 20% (which would make the numbers implode if this wasn’t made up ;-). The plan pays 5 levels deep, and follows "five who get five who get five, etc." To generate $1,000,000 in revenue would require $5,000,000 in volume. One leg would look like this: You 5 on level 1 25 on level 2 125 on level 3 625 on level 4 3125 on level 5 Total of 3,906 people in each leg. You build one leg per year for ten years, or an organization of 39,060 people. Each person would need to generate $128 in volume, or about $11 per month, on average. Your step is to build one leg per year with an average volume of $128 per distributor per year. Now it’s time to work backwards again. To keep things simple again, we’ll just assume the 80/20 rule holds here. We’ll assume that for everything you do, you get your intended result 1 out of 5 times. So, to build one productive leg, you need to start five legs per year. That means finding a new rep every 2 months (I’m only making you work 10 months a year. Am I a nice guy, or what?) Keeping the 80/20 rule, 1 leg = 5 new front line reps 5 new front line reps = 25 serious presentations 25 presentations = 125 in the pipeline 125 in the pipeline = 625 initial responses 625 initial responses = 3125 looking 3125 looking = 15625 impressions so to get our new leg, we have to reach 15,625 people. Working 5 days a week for two months, that’s about 390 people per day. Now we have something we have control over, and it’s time for (ta-dah): Specific Actions What Specific Daily Actions (SDA) can you take to put your message in front of 390 people per day? How about submitting an article to an ezine that reaches 400 subscribers? (oops, 80/20 rule, make that ‘submitting an article to 5 ezines, each with 400 subscribers, and counting on one publication) How about posting on a forum read by 2,000 people? Or sending a post to a mailing lists with 2000 subscribers? (Assuming 20% will notice your sig and click on it.) You get the idea. Your SDA’s are things you have control over, so they’re actions you can be accountable for. From "building a business worth $5,000,000" to "taking one specific action every day". How’s that for a ridiculous(-ly simple) way to succeed? Just go out and take one specific action every day towards your vision. Each day counts. Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn! Look to this Day! For it is Life, the very Life of Life. For in its brief course lie all the Verities and Realities of your Existence: The Bliss of Growth, The Glory of Action, The Splendor of Beauty. For Yesterday is but a Dream, And Tomorrow is only a Vision; But Today well-lived makes every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope. Look well therefore to this Day! Such is the Salutation of the Dawn.
I was at work one day, calling on a customer who wasn’t answering her phone. Her voice mail message started out in the usual way, “…we’re not home, leave a message…” what followed was not so usual. It continued, “…by the way, we’ve recently made some changes in our life, if we don’t call you back, you’re one of the changes, beeeep”. My first reaction was disbelief at what was probably one of the rudest messages I had ever heard (and I’ve heard quite a few!). But I couldn’t get it off my mind, and by the end of the day I had changed my perspective. I began to admire this woman, who was obviously at the end of her rope. She was very determined, for whatever reason, to end relationships that were affecting her life in a negative way. Change is never easy, especially when it requires us to dramatically alter the way we’ve become accustom to living our lives. Leaving our comfort zone, no matter how much we dislike it, requires a combination of bravery and determination, as well as education in that area. Many times we’re so desperate to better ourselves, we hastily make ineffective and, sometimes expensive, decisions that we feel will quickly produce the results we are looking for. Purchasing a costly gym membership and vowing to attend seven days a week while surviving on lettuce, may seem like a great idea for a few weeks (if you’re very determined,) but how long can you live like that? If you’re serious about making a long-term change in your life, take these steps to ensure your success: Educate Yourself Aside from determination, education is the most important key to your success. Knowing exactly what you must do to accomplish your goals will give you the power to make them a reality. Consult a professional or check out a book written by a credible authority on the subject. You can also tap the wealth of information to be found on the Internet. Friends and acquaintances can also provide insight. I have a good friend who is very organized, an area in which I am always trying to improve. Over the years I have learned a great deal from watching her manage her incredibly busy life. Set Reasonable Goals You are not going to lose 30 pounds in two weeks. Nor are you going to undo years of financial irresponsibility in six months. After becoming educated, you will get a realistic picture of how long it will be before you should expect to see results. Having this knowledge upfront will prevent you from giving up too soon. Plan and Track If you’re trying to accomplish something that requires long-term commitment, purchase a journal or notebook to write down your short and long term goals. Detail how you will carry them out and when you will complete them. Check each item off as you accomplish it. Keeping a journal to record your achievements can be motivating on those days when you feel like sliding back to your old ways. Just Say No Avoid situations that will prevent you from accomplishing your goals. This is especially important in the beginning, before your new way of life comes natural to you. Pat Yourself on the Back Be proud of yourself for making the decision to improve your quality of life. When you reach important milestones, reward yourself in a way that is in sync with your new lifestyle. A new outfit is a great reward for losing weight, but would be considered a setback if you’re trying to cut back on spending!
So many people want to start a business today and be rich tomorrow. Sorry, people it doesn't happen that way. If it did, everyone would do it. There is no free lunch...it takes hard work, determination and realistic goal setting. Think about the businesses you have worked at, look at the businesses in your community. I mean really look. When you go to the dry cleaners, how many other people are there also. Think about what it takes for that dry cleaner to open every day. How many people he needs to come in with their dry cleaning in order to make a profit. OK, dry cleaning doesn't excite you. How about that specialty shop you want to open! You want to open a retail store that caters to people that buy Hummels, knick knacs, bric-a-brac. Will you only handle certain types? How many will you order of each type? What are the best sellers? How many will you have to sell to make money for yourself, and to also keep that shop open, or will you sell them by mail order only from your home? Want to do business on the web? The same principles apply. How many visitors to your web site do you need to make a sale? How do you get them to visit? How do you get them to stay? You get the idea. You need goals in order to measure any progress in your business. Realistic goals come from a well thought out mission statement, which leads to a very good business plan, which leads to a well thought out marketing strategy. You should have short and long term goals. The short term goals will cover the upcoming 6 months to 2 years. Your long term goals will go further out, let's say over the next five years. Remember, you need to give a business at least two years in order to give it a real chance. Not all businesses make a gigantic profit immediately. Let's say you want to start a house cleaning business. Your initial plan is to work it yourself, and add independent contractors as needed. You decide on your mission statement, you make up your business plan. You want to make $500 per week, working six days per week, 10 hour days. Your marketing will include advertising in your local paper, flyers, and mailers. You can clean 3 houses/apartments per day at $25-$50. You also have to decide your price points, what will you charge for a 1 bedroom, 2 bedroom, or a house with 3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms, etc. After all this is done you can better determine how many of each type you will need each week to meet you goal of $500 per week. These are your short term realistic goals. Your long term goals are to eventually hire independent contractors to do the work. Obviously, the more clients you market for, the more independent contractors you need, but also the more income you can generate. You will make up long term goals for the third, fourth, and fifth years of how many independent contractors you want to add and how many clients you want. Your marketing plan will reflect what you need to do to get the numbers you are projecting. Realistic goals can and must be set, you just need a plan. For example, in Lease Purchasing, as in any other business, goal setting is of paramount importance. You need to follow a plan, a plan for success. Short term goals and long term goals are part of this plan. Like many franchise businesses that have an outline for their franchisees to follow for a successful business, the same should be done in lease purchasing. To set these realistic goals and to obtain a good foundation, you need a program that provides you with support in the start up and running of your business. Using our own Lease Purchase Coaching Program as an example, we schedule consultations that cover all students need to know to get started. We role play with students and have specific assignments giving them certain things to do, and certain goals to meet. If they follow the program, and do their deals, they will be able to run their own successful business. We work with our students to accomplish the above and to help them set realistic goals. An example of goals in Lease Purchasing is the number of deals you want to do, and how many calls or contacts you need to make to do that number of deals. How many consultations do you want to do, again, how many contacts you make will determine how many you get. Lease Purchasing like many other businesses is a numbers game. Make so many contacts, and/or calls and get so many deals. However, in order to do this, you have to make some goal making decisions and set realistic goals, not farfetched ones. Making a million dollars by the end of six months is not a realistic goal. Making so many calls per day, per week, per month is, and then from the number of calls/contacts you make, realize you are going to get so many responses, and from those responses make so many deals. A realistic income working full time the first year is $50,000 to $75,000. Following a proven method is of the utmost importance. You don't hear of many Burger King or Taco Bell franchises failing. Why, because they follow the corporate plan. The company will tell them there are no short cuts. If they want to succeed, they need to follow the company's proven formula. The people who fail in business are usually those who don't listen; don't want to follow a proven program; want to take short cuts; and who don't set realistic goals. So remember, no matter what your business is, if you want to succeed you need to set goals for yourself ... and make them realistic. Copyright DeFiore Enterprises 2003
Question: You seem to be very sceptical that someone with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder can be treated successfully. Answer: The Narcissistic Personality Disorder has been recognised as a distinct mental health diagnosis a little more than two decades ago. There are few who can honestly claim expertise or even in-depth understanding of this complex condition. No one knows whether therapy works. What is known is that therapists find narcissists repulsive, overbearing and unnerving. It is also known that narcissists try to co-opt, idolize, or humiliate the therapist. But what if the narcissist really wants to improve? Even if complete healing is out of the question - behaviour modification is not. To a narcissist, I would recommend a functional approach, along the following lines: Know and accept thyself. This is who you are. You have good traits and bad traits and you are a narcissist. These are facts. Narcissism is an adaptive mechanism. It is dysfunctional now, but, once, it saved you from a lot more dysfunction or even non-function. Make a list: what does it mean to be a narcissist in your specific case? What are your typical behaviour patterns? Which types of conduct do you find to be counterproductive, irritating, self-defeating or self-destructive? Which are productive, constructive and should be enhanced despite their pathological origin? Decide to suppress the first type of behaviours and to promote the second. Construct lists of self-punishments, negative feedback and negative reinforcements. Impose them upon yourself when you have behaved negatively. Make a list of prizes, little indulgences, positive feedbacks and positive reinforcements. Use them to reward yourself when you adopted a behaviour of the second kind. Keep doing this with the express intent of conditioning yourself. Be objective, predictable and just in the administration of both punishments and awards, positive and negative reinforcements and feedback. Learn to trust your "inner court". Constrain the sadistic, immature and ideal parts of your personality by applying a uniform codex, a set of immutable and invariably applied rules. Once sufficiently conditioned, monitor yourself incessantly. Narcissism is sneaky and it possesses all your resources because it is you. Your disorder is intelligent because you are. Beware and never lose control. With time this onerous regime will become a second habit and supplant the narcissistic (pathological) superstructure. You might have noticed that all the above can be amply summed by suggesting to you to become your own parent. This is what parents do and the process is called "education" or "socialisation". Re-parent yourself. Be your own parent. If therapy is helpful or needed, go ahead. The heart of the beast is the inability of the narcissist to distinguish true from false, appearances from reality, posing from being, Narcissistic Supply from genuine relationships, and compulsive drives from true interests and avocations. Narcissism is about deceit. It blurs the distinction between authentic actions, true motives, real desires, and original emotions – and their malignant forms. Narcissists are no longer capable of knowing themselves. Terrified by their internal apparitions, paralysed by their lack of authenticity, suppressed by the weight of their repressed emotions – they occupy a hall of mirrors. Edvard Munch-like, their elongated figures stare at them, on the verge of the scream, yet somehow, soundless. The narcissist's childlike, curious, vibrant, and optimistic True Self is dead. His False Self is, well, false. How can anyone on a permanent diet of echoes and reflections ever acquaint himself with reality? How can the narcissist ever love – he, whose essence is to devour meaningful others? The answer is: discipline, decisiveness, clear targets, conditioning, justice. The narcissist is the product of unjust, capricious and cruel treatment. He is the finished product off a production line of self-recrimination, guilt and fear. He needs to take the antidote to counter the narcissistic poison. Unfortunately, there is no drug which can ameliorate pathological narcissism. Confronting one's parents about one's childhood is a good idea if the narcissist feels that he can take it and cope with new and painful truths. But the narcissist must be careful. He is playing with fire. Still, if he feels confident that he can withstand anything revealed to him in such a confrontation, it is a good and wise move in the right direction. My advice to the narcissist would then be: dedicate a lot of time to rehearsing this critical encounter and define well what is it exactly that you want to achieve. Do not turn this reunion into a monodrama, group therapy, or trial. Get some answers and get at the truth. Don't try to prove anything, to vindicate, to take revenge, to win the argument, or to exculpate. Talk to them, heart to heart, as you would with yourself. Do not try to sound professional, mature, intelligent, knowledgeable and distanced. There is no "problem to solve" – just a condition to adjust yourself to. More generally, try to take life and yourself much less seriously. Being immersed in one's self and in one's mental health condition is never the recipe to full functionality, let alone happiness. The world is an absurd place. It is indeed a theatre to be enjoyed. It is full of colours and smells and sounds to be treasured and cherished. It is varied and it accommodates and tolerates everyone and everything, even narcissists. You, the narcissist, should try to see the positive aspects of your disorder. In Chinese, the ideogram for "crisis" includes a part that stands for "opportunity". Why don't you transform the curse that is your life into a blessing? Why don't you tell the world your story, teach people in your condition and their victims how to avoid the pitfalls, how to cope with the damage? Why don't you do all this in a more institutionalised manner? For instance, you can start a discussion group or put up a Web site on the internet. You can establish a "narcissists anonymous" in some community shelter. You can open a correspondence network, a help centre for men in your condition, for women abused by narcissists … the possibilities are endless. And it will instil in you a regained sense of self-worth, give you a purpose, endow you with self-confidence and reassurance. It is only by helping others that we help ourselves. This is, of course, a suggestion – not a prescription. But it demonstrates the ways in which you can derive power from adversity. It is easy for the narcissist to think about Pathological Narcissism as the source of all that is evil and wrong in his life. Narcissism is a catchphrase, a conceptual scapegoat, an evil seed. It conveniently encapsulates the predicament of the narcissist. It introduces logic and causal relations into his baffled, tumultuous world. But this is a trap. The human psyche is too complex and the brain too plastic to be captured by a single, all-encompassing label, however all-pervasive the disorder is. The road to self-help and self-betterment passes through numerous junctions and stations. Except for pathological narcissism, there are many other elements in the complex dynamics that is the soul of the narcissist. The narcissist should take responsibility for his life and not relegate it to some hitherto rather obscure psychodynamic concept. This is the first and most important step towards healing.
Goal setting helps us determine our priorities, get organized, make big decisions, and realize our dreams. The act of merely setting a goal brings about positive change for many people. When you set a goal you are creating an exciting challenge for yourself. Almost all motivational experts incorporate goal setting as an important part of their programs. The effectiveness of Goal Setting can be seen in the incredible accomplishments of people such as: Henry Ford who wanted to make cars affordable for everyone, Bill Gates whose goal was to have a computer in every household, and John F. Kennedy who set out to put a man on the moon within a decade. There is a famous story about Jim Carrey who, while struggling as an actor in 1987, drove his car up on Mulholland Drive in the Hollywood hills to think about the future. While sitting there overlooking the city of Los Angeles he wrote a check made out to himself for "acting services rendered" in the amount of $10 million. He dated the check for Thanksgiving of 1995. Jim's Goal turned out to be conservative because by the time 1995 rolled around he was making $20 million a movie. The objective of MyGoalManager is to direct the user through the entire Goal process from definition to achievement. This Goal Achievement process entails the following requirements: Well formed Goal Statements Breaking goals down into manageable Steps Motivation and Commitment Reminders and Keeping on track Frequent Review and Re-assessment 1. Well formed Goal Statements The Goal Statement forms the basis for the entire process so careful attention should be placed on formulating a clear and accurate goal statement. A good way to remember how a goal statement should be defined is the old S. M.A. R.T. acronym used by many experts in goal setting. SMART stands for: Specific Measurable Action-Oriented Realistic Tangible The Goal should be specific enough so that we know exactly what we are striving for, measurable so we know exactly what is to be accomplished and when it has been reached, action-oriented declaring positive activity that will produce results, realistic in that it is practical and can be achieved given the limited availability of resources, and tangible meaning concrete and not vague. The goal statement “Increase sales 25% by the end of the fiscal year without increasing advertising spending” is an example that follows these rules. 2. Breaking down Goals into manageable Steps Once we have a well-formed Goal Statement we need some direction to follow to achieve this Goal. While the goal “Increase sales 25% by the end of the fiscal year without increasing advertising spending” is a great goal statement, this is a monumental task without being broken down into smaller detailed steps. The creation of Goal Steps gives us an "Action Plan" that when completed will lead to Goal Achievement. Steps also allow for tracking of progress towards the goal. Goal Steps should be positive and not used to list obstacles that must be overcome which focuses on the negative. Negativity can kill motivation but there is power in positive thinking. 3. Motivation and Commitment Motivation and commitment are what make us strive to achievement. They give us the push, desire, and resolve to complete all of the other steps in the Goal process. This motivation can be obtained by developing a personal statement that creates a high level of emotion and energy that guarantees achievement. One self help expert said that as a child he was kicked out of his local country club pool because he was not a member, in response he later made a goal that he would one day have a pool that is one foot bigger than that country club's pool. The motivation of being asked to leave the pool provided the necessary fuel for him to achieve this goalmitment creates more accountability and is what sets us on direct course to reach our goals. It may create costly negative consequences upon failure to attain a goal. Making a commitment might be something like having invested your savings in your new business which you will lose if it fails. Motivation and commitment are specific to your situation and life and only you can form statements that will ensure you reach your goal the quickest. The more personal you make your motivation and commitment statements for each goal, the more motivated you will be to accomplish your goal. 4. Reminders and Keeping on Track Reaching our goals requires persistence and regular attention. We need some sort of system to keep us reminded and accountable. MyGoalManager uses a combination reminder emails, calendars, and reports to keep users organized and on track. Sharing goals with others who can give you help and support is a highly effective way to increase your chances for success. If some accountability system is not used then we are likely to lose sight and fail. 5. Frequent Review and Re-assessment When we first sit down and start to define goals it can seem like a difficult and daunting task but over time it begins to get much easier. Patience is required. Goal Setting is definitely an ongoing process that is accomplished over time. Any goals program that defines goals and then ignores them will fail. All goals due in the next year should be reviewed at least once a week and daily if possible. The great thing about frequent review is that this forces us to make big decisions and determine priorities in our life. We should keep watch for goals that are not being achieved on time or for goals on which we keep extending the deadline.