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    What makes a bad relationship

     

    Are you in a relationship right now? If you are, is it going smoothly or is it going through very rough times? Not all relationships are alike; there are always these good relationships and bad relationships. How you and your partner will handle the relationship will determine if it is a bad relationship or if it is a good one and going on smoothly. If you are in a bad relationship right now, perhaps you will wonder how your romantic relationship has a sudden twist. You might have asked yourself what you have done wrong or what your shortcomings were. Here are some things that you can think about why you have a bad relationship: Lack of Communication Communication is an important part of every relationship. Lack of communication can make a romantic relationship turn into a bad relationship because this keeps both you and your partner from having a clear understanding of what is really going on and why a certain problem is happening. Aside from this, it also creates more conflicts since you do not know what the other exactly wants and expects from the relationship. Keeping oneself in silence when a problem in the relationship arises will not do you any good but instead it will aggravate the problem. It is not a good idea that you do not open up about what you really feel or how your partner feels. If both of you continue to be in silence, expect your bad relationship to turn into worse. Infidelity and Dishonesty Infidelity and dishonesty are two words that are often associated with each other. If a person is unfaithful, he or she is dishonest in so many ways. Lots of break-ups nowadays are due to infidelity. If you find out that your partner is unfaithful to you, of course this can lead to a serious fight and more heated arguments. For sure, your initial reaction will be so outraged that you will not be able to listen to reasons anymore. Upon knowing your partner’s infidelity, you will come to realize some of the dishonest answers that he or she gave you in the past when you ask about some important things. Your once happy and romantic relationship will now turn into a bad relationship because there is one important element which is lacking and that is trust. You begin to become more suspicious and jealous so from then your arguments will be in circles which can eventually lead to breakup. Pride Pride is another main reason to have a bad relationship. Conflicts and petty fights are part of every relationship so you should not be devastated if you and your partner encounter and go through these from time to time. There is nothing wrong in having arguments because you are able to voice out your views and opinions about an issue. However, having these become more of a problem when you let your pride take over instead of humbling down and realize your mistake. Pride will never do you good if you are in a relationship. You should always know how to ask for forgiveness if you made a mistake or give way if you think that what your partner says will be beneficial to you and to the relationship. These are just some of the things that can make a bad relationship. If you think that one or all these is the reason why you are now in a bad relationship, perhaps you should start reassessing yourself and the whole situation in order to save it.

         
    What makes a relationship a box of chocolates

     

    “I love you.” What a punch these three simple words can bring – if it’s delivered the right way. The thing is, some people just can’t say it comfortably without the words tripping out of their mouths. You’d think they’ll morph and turn into ogres, the way they squirm and go around beating around the bush before finally saying the words. Then there are also those who openly say the words but don’t really mean it. Nevertheless, it doesn’t matter if they do or don’t say the words. What matters is that a relationship remains honest and happy. What are the things that make a relationship work anyway? The same factors work for all kinds of relationship. Whether it’s a relationship between lovers, among family members, friends, office workers, and business partners, the same foundations apply for it to work. If a pillar is missing, the whole thing crumbles. Three pillars make up the foundation. We call the three pillars The Relationship Tripod. Let us discuss them in detail: The Companionship Leg First, it must be understood that a relationship requires at least two people for it to exist, let alone work. You must be visible to the other person. If the relationship is long distance, you must at least feel that the other one is there. It won’t do any good to take the other’s existence for granted and count on the other to check up on you. You must also show compassion. If you keep up the show of indifference, it just spells failure. The other person needs to sense your feelings for them. Show them kindness, gentleness, sensitivity - anything that shows you care for them. It’s not that hard to say “I’m always here for you,” is it? Whoever receives this show of affection must give something back. Everyone must do his or her part in a relationship because it’s a give and take condition. The Compromise Leg As mentioned earlier, a relationship is a give-and-take situation. Not all people are made alike; even if two people are so uncannily similar, there might still exist small differences that could spark an argument. This is why an agreement has to be reached on every argument, whether petty or vital. All kinds are important, especially when it comes to a relationship. Someone has to win and someone has to give in. This is why the discussion of differences is so essential. Discuss the disparity: What is the problem? Why is it a problem? Who should compromise and adjust to the problem? All these should be resolved. Conceding sometimes doesn’t make you a loser; rather, it goes to show how important a relationship is to you. “I guess you’re right.” These words could be the balm of your disputes. The Communication Leg There would be no discussion of differences, no showing of affection, and no saying of words without communication. This third and last leg is probably the most vital in a relationship. It enables us to know what the other party feels and what is needed to make the partnership work. It gives us the ability to say the words that are wanted and needed. In short, the other two legs won’t happen if the last one isn’t present. Just a small act of communication could go a long way in improving a relationship. You can do simple things like writing a small note on a piece of paper, or writing short emails at least occasionally. Do something to give truth to your existence and your relationship. Don’t take this for granted, because a lot of relationships crumble due to lack of any contact. Take the long distance relationship, for instance. A lot fail, but some succeed because they make contact with each other almost every day. Even business associates keep in contact by sending each other progress reports. Any form of relationship is a box of chocolates, as Forrest Gump puts it. Some tastes good and some don’t. Overall, the experience of having a box of chocolates gives you a good feeling because eating each and every piece of chocolate gives an experience - an experience of bitterness, sweetness, or even bitter-sweetness. You don’t get every flavor that you desire in a box. So if you are looking for a relationship that is easy on the heart and mind, get ready for the harsh reality. It entails the effort of everyone involved for it to work well.

         
    What makes up a diamonds clarity

     

    Clarity refers to an objects transparency or purity. This is a very important characteristic for diamonds. To determine a diamond's clarity the placement, appearance, and number of inclusions, blemishes, or flaws are noted. The number of inclusions, blemishes, or flaws can affect the opacity of the diamond, its sparkle, and its overall brilliance. The Gemological Institute of America (GIA) is a not for profit institution dedicated to research and education in the field of gemology. The GIA is responsible for creating a gem scale to rate diamonds clarity. The scale is as follows: Flawless(FL): This refers to a diamond that does not have any blemishes or inclusions at all when viewed under a 10x magnification by an experienced diamontologist. Internally Flawless(IF): This refers to a diamond that does not have any inclusions, but may have some minor blemishes when observed by a certified diamontologist under a 10x magnification. Very Very Slightly Included(VVS1 and VVS2): This refers to a diamond that has very tiny inclusions. These inclusions will be hard, even for an experienced diamontologist, to see when using a 10x magnification. Very Slightly Included(VS1 and VS2): This refers to a diamond that has very minute inclusions such as small clouds, feathers, or crystals when observed under a 10x magnification. Slightly Included(SL1 and SL2): This refers to a diamond that has noticeable inclusions such as clouds, feathers, or crystals, that are evident to an experienced diamontologist under a 10x magnification. Included(I1, I2, and I3): This diamond is often referred to as imperfect. It may contain some inclusions that are fairly apparent to an experienced diamontologist that may be visible without any magnification. From the above definitions it is easy to tell that you do not want your diamond to have too many inclusions, but what exactly is an inclusion? An inclusion is an internal characteristic that, due to the immense pressure it takes to create a diamond, is often formed during the formation process or caused by an irregularity in the crystal structure. A blemish on the other hand is an external characteristic that can be caused during the formation of the diamond, during the cutting process, or by everyday wear. There are many different types of inclusions. One common type of inclusion are feathers. Feathers look quite literally like feathers and in some cases extend to the diamonds surface. The diamonds stability can be affected if the feathers extend to the surface of the diamond. Some other types of inclusions are bearding, cleavage, crystals, and pinpoints. One common type of blemish is naturals. Naturals refer to a part of the diamond that was not polished during the original cutting/polishing phase. Hence they are still natural. Some other examples of blemishes are fracture, nicks, and scratches. These inclusions and blemishes are not always a bad thing. They are used as a way to identify diamonds. A truly flawless diamond is very hard to find and very expensive as well. It is always a good idea to have your jeweler plot your diamonds characteristics so that you can easily identify it in the future.

         
    What s the point understanding woman speak

     

    Women and men communicate differently with women being more verbal and vocal and men not so much. Women are also much more emotional and many would "argue" speak an entirely different language altogether. And some (okay, most) would insist that they encode what they mean or are trying to say behind frivolous words and phrases. But, if you've got one of these beguiling creatures in you life, it's up to YOU to figure her out and figure out what she really means, especially if you want to keep the piece. Sorry Situations: Just because she apologizes doesn't mean she thinks she was wrong (in fact she probably doesn't believe she was). All it really means is that she's initiating the reconciliation, and the LEAST she expects you to do is admit your faults and say you’re sorry too. Weighty Issues: Most women want and need to be affirmed and want to know that they are still attractive to their man. So, when she asks if she looks fat, she's simply fishing for compliments and wants to know you think of her as beautiful. Make sure your answer is honest BUT accentuates her attractiveness and her appeal (In fact, if you don't like how she looks, you may want to say, you look lovely in that but I tend to prefer you in a dress, or pants, or in that red outfit, etc) Her Get Up and Go: She may start hinting that she’s tired or has lots to do tomorrow. She may even suggest that you stay behind and have a good time. Dude, that's you cue to get ready to go. Kidding Around: She may be complimenting you sense of humor and your disposition with nieces and nephews, but in reality she wants to know your thoughts on kids, having some of your own, and how soon. Even if you don't foresee having children in the immediate future, keep in mind that ladies like to look ahead, well ahead, so, if you're not opposed to the idea (even if it is down the road) give her the answer she's fishing for, or come up with an equally indirect response of your own. Fine And Seek: She gives every indication that there may be something wrong, but when you ask she assures you it's "nothing". Well guys, you just may be damned if you do and damned if you don't. If you take it at face value that everything is status quo, she'll continue being annoyed, but if do your job and identify the problem, you just may be in for a fight. But, remember she's WAITING for you to figure it out and to be given the chance to get it off her chest.

         
    What to do if she just needs a break

     

    Long Term Relationships are very difficult to sustain. After some time appear a lot of misunderstandings, argues and problems which are inevitable because that's life. There are couples which know how to get over these problems and their relationship continues, but many of them fail. But there are also other reasons why a couple break down as because there is no love anymore, they can't understand anymore or just that one of them is bored in this relationship. Although, what happens if she say that she still loves you but she needs a break? Let's say that a few days ago, your girlfriend of just over two years told you that she needs a break; she still says that she loves you and want you to be together some day, but right now she needs some space, a break in order to settle her minds. What should you do? First of all you should try to ask her the reasons, doesn't she likes someone else? Maybe she won't tell you the truth and keep telling you lie in the face, but let her know that by taking this break is the risk of losing you forever. So if she really cares about you she will be a little worried that the game she planed would not go as she wanted. If you have the power, you should confront her and tell her that she is right, you feel too trapped lately and you consider too that is the best for you to have a break, even this is not what you want and your heart is broken. If a girl asks for a break in relationship you have to give her that; if she still loves you as she said then she will come back to you. If she tells you that she will call you, you've better wait until she decides to do it. So do not try to contact her, to not call her, give her the time she needs. To not try desperately to get her back because she will run of you and then you will never get her back. Leave her alone, be busy and she will be sorry for letting you. You have to think what may be the reasons why she wants to take a break as opposed to break up. Maybe you haven't been the best boyfriend she ever wanted. Or maybe she is making new friends, venturing on her own, enjoying the single life, having second thoughts about the relationship and she is outgrowing you; she is having fun right now, but having you as a boyfriend may not really fit into her new life. Another reason why she wants to take a break is that she is not quite ready to let you go, but she wants to be able to meet other guys, without resorting to cheating on you; or she just met a new boy that she likes but she is not sure if she wants to stay with him or you. What happens if she still calls you, dating sometime, but she doesn't tell you to get back together? The best thing you can do is to show her that you are fine without her, even if your heart is broken; all the girls are the same: when a girl it feels unwanted, is ready to do anything in order to be wanted again; so if she doesn't come running back it means that she didn't care too much. You have to wait a little after her, but not too much. If she is sure that you love her, she likes this situation: she feels that she still has a boyfriend when she wants too, and also it is free to find someone new. So start letting go of your feelings for her right now and start date with other girls meantime because it is not considerate cheating because right now you are not a couple anymore, you are separated. It is the only way for you to move on with your life and if by some chance the two of you get back together someday, it will be on your terms. So go out with your own friends and have some fun. When people decided to take a break, what they are really doing is taking time to see if there is somebody more suited for them out there. So you must think better if your girlfriend doesn’t care about her more than she cares you.

         
    What to do when people don t like you

     

    Have you been trying hard to make friends with no good results to show for all of your efforts? If it seems that you have been trying hard to make friends, but that other people still don’t want to be your friend, you may have come to the conclusion that there’s something wrong with you. That maybe you are basically unlikeable. Many of us go through such torment of self doubt, especially during our teenage years, when teens are often the victims of vicious bullying from their peers for no reason at all. If you feel as if the people you are trying to befriend don’t like you, the first thing you must do is to ask yourself: Do you have any real evidence that others don’t like you? Or are you just imagining the worst because you are always very harsh with yourself? People who have low self-esteem, or who are suffering from depression, are often convinced that others don’t like them, even when there is no evidence for their negative belief. People who have a poor self image can be surrounded by others who like them, care about them, and enjoy their company; yet because these people don’t believe they are worthy of being liked, they are convinced that no one else likes them either. So, if you are feeling as if nobody likes you, try to find out if there is some real evidence that others don’t like you, or whether you are just being very negative in your opinion of yourself. On the other hand, there are times when it’s not just your imagination that others don’t like you. It might be really true that most of the people you meet are consistently rejecting you, even when you make social overtures and try to be as friendly to them as possible. There are many reasons this can happen. You may have moved to a society where the people are very tight knit with each other, and they don’t open up to newcomers easily. You might be surrounded by people who automatically dislike people of your particular religion, ethnic background, sexual orientation, skin color, or bodily appearance. You may be surrounded by people who reject you because the clothes you wear are not the latest and most expensive fashion. In high school years in particular, many teens are strongly conformist, and can be very cruel to those who seem to be different from the norm. Sadly, some people never grow out of the stage of judging others for trivial and superficial reasons. If you are really are being rejected by others, it is important that you don’t make the situation worse by attacking yourself. This will only make you feel worse, and will make you lose confidence in approaching new people in the future. Saying negative things to yourself could start you on a downward spiral of self-doubt and self-hatred. Or you might turn your anger outwards in a spirit of bitterness and revenge towards other people. This is not a solution that will win you friends or peace of mind. It’s also important to take a good, hard look at yourself and the way that you interact with other people. There may be specific behaviors that are causing others to dislike you, and these are behaviors which you can change. Ask yourself the questions on this checklist. If it looks as if any of these behaviors are a problem for you, it’s very likely that if you change this behavior, that other people will like you better. 1. Are you always very negative and complaining all the time? Most people find this habit very annoying. 2. Do you actively participate in conversations with others? Or do you hold back and let other people do all the work in making conversation. If so, learn to improve your conversational skills so that talking with you is an experience that others look forward to. 3. Do you endlessly talk about yourself and show little interest in the people you are talking with? Other people will become bored with you very quickly if you seem only interested in yourself. 4. Do you try too hard to please others, always agreeing with everything that they say, and never having any opinions of your own? People won’t respect you if you don’t respect yourself. 5. Do you often say things that hurt the feelings of others and then say it was just a joke? Do you say mean things behind other people’s backs? No one will trust you if they think that you are basically an unkind person. If you want to make other people your friends, it’s very important that you don’t give up on trying. Keep approaching people, keep trying to make conversation. Get rid of your bad social habits if they are getting in the way of friendship. If you are being given the cold shoulder by many of the people you encounter, particularly in your school or workplace, keep looking elsewhere for people you can confide in and befriend. You can try in your church, in your community, and in your own family. Work on developing the talents and good qualities within yourself so that you can appeal in a new way to other people with whom you will have more in common. Continue to actively search out other people who will like you and accept you.

         
    What to do when your spouse or your friends are negative

     

    This year (2004), I've completed over 64 seminars. And one of the most common questions asked is, "What do I do when my spouse, partner or friend is being negative?" As you practice Law of Attraction in your life, you become more aware of what you are attracting and start to understand that you can control what you attract with deliberate use of Law of Attraction. The more deliberate you become in controlling what you want to attract, the less and less tolerant you become of any situation that doesn't feel good---in particular, negative relationships in your life. But what do you do when the person who is being negative is your partner, spouse or child? It's not likely you will just eliminate them from your life altogether. How can you deal with a situation that is contaminating your positive energy with negative energy? First of all, I'd like you to remember that it takes two people to argue or fight and you always have a choice about what you choose to talk about. When you are with your mate, or friend or child and they are complaining about something they don't like or telling you how much their life isn't working in some respect, you always have two choices: 1) You can buy into their conversation, join it and thereby lower your vibration to match theirs; or 2) You can steer the conversation in a direction that creates change in the vibration How do you steer a conversation into a more positive vibration? It's quite simple; just ask the question, "So what do you want?" That question may surprise them because they are not used to answering it. They may even have some resistance. But keep asking it. When they do answer, you'll soon hear their words change and see how the change of words always creates a change in their vibration. The best news of all is that a person can only hold one vibration at a time. Yes, we all have negative people in our lives, but now you have a tool to use when you feel your positive energy becoming affected by anyone's negative energy. From now on, your experiences with negative people can be different! Here's your assignment! Write the question, "So what do you want?" on post-it notes and put them by your phone, on your fridge and on your bathroom mirror. This is a powerful tool that delivers rapid change!

         
    What you say what people hear

     

    Communication between partners often gets confusing, and there is a very good reason for this. Most of the time, the words we use have far less impact than the energy behind the words. Therefore, what you say is often not what the other person hears. The energy behind a communication is determined by our INTENTION. In much of the communication between partners, there are two different intentions that can motivate any given communication: we are often either intent upon controlling the other person, or intent upon learning about ourselves and our partner. The difference in energy between these two intentions is what frequently creates the confusion in communication. For example, in one of my phone counseling sessions with Joshua, he complained about the fact that his wife, Joan, often gets upset with him over seemingly minor issues. A recent conflict had occurred over a book she was reading. He had asked her why she was reading that particular book, and she had responded to him with irritation. “Joshua,” I asked, “why were you asking her about the book?” “I was just curious.” “Go deeper,” I said. “Was there anything about the book that was threatening to you?” “Well….yeah. It was a book about women and codependency.” “And what was threatening to you?” “I’m afraid of Joan pulling away from me.” “So, which intent do you think was operating at that moment - the intent to control her or the intent to learn about yourself and her?” “I guess to be honest, I have to say that I was wanting to control. When I think back on it, I think my tone of voice may have been blaming. Joan always tells me that she hates how much I try to control her, and I always think she is wrong about that. But I think I was trying to control her.” “And she responded to your intent to control with irritation, which is what is happening frequently in your relationship, right?” “Right. So what would I have said if I was open to learning?” “It’s not so much the words as it is the energy behind the words. The energy behind the words, ‘Why are you reading that book?” is totally different when the intent is to control than when the intent is to learn. The same words can be said with a blaming, shaming edge, or with real caring and curiosity. It is your intent that determines the energy behind the words. Joan was not responding to the words themselves, but to the blaming and shaming behind the words. This is what is causing the confusion for you regarding your communication with her. The exact same words can communicate two totally different things, depending upon the intent. And the chances are that if you had not felt threatened by the book, you might not have even questioned her about why she was reading it.” “Yes, I can see where that is probably true. Okay, I got it. I’ve been trying to control her and that is what she is responding to, not to the words I’ve been using.” Joshua started to notice his intent. Every time Joan got irritated or distant from him, he noticed that his intent was to control. It was a big challenge to shift out of trying to control her, since he had been doing this most of his life in all his relationships, but Joshua was very motivated to change. He knew that if he didn’t, he ran the risk of losing his marriage. He started to focus on taking loving care of himself and his own feelings instead of trying to change Joan. As Joshua became more aware of his intent, he was able to consciously shift his intent from controlling to learning about taking care of himself. As his intent shifted, the energy of his communications with Joan shifted, and their relationship greatly improved. Joshua was thrilled with the deeper understanding and intimacy that was growing between them.

         
    What you should know about russian women

     

    Looking for reliable companion and caring friend? Why a Russian wife? I am sure that you will be quite surprised to learn that most women of European background on matrimonial sites are Russian, particularly with matrimonial services that are meant to foster marriage and dedicated to those who wish to create a family. While dating sites are loaded with ladies from other countries. Then also, there are hardly any religious (spiritual) i. e. Christian Russian or Muslim Russian matrimonial sites. You might have been (and still are) wondering why Russian women? The answer is rather simply profound: Russian ladies are naturally very family orientated and much more homely than most of other ladies from the USA and Europe. And Russian women generally put family above career or anything else. Maybe with time and the rapidly spreading ideas of equality and growing feminism, this phenomena will slowly diminish and perhaps even disappear, but the phenomena of beautiful intelligent women whose priorities are still a husband and children and not a socialite life and career predominates. But for now men from all over the world can consider themselves really lucky that such women still exist. And that in one woman one can find all one can ever dream of: loyalty, beauty, femininity, intelligence, passion, sharp mind, kind, loving heart, faithfulness, understanding, broad vision, excellent shape, numerous talents and skills, romantic nature, willingness to learn, ability to adapt and to sacrifice. The Russian mystical nature blended with a natural instinct given to all women by mother-nature: desire to love and to be loved, to have a family, to make a husband happy and to take good care of children, smart companion, beautiful apple of one's eye, supportive caring friend, loving wife, passionate love and protective mother makes for contentment and a stress-free life. In comparison to some "masculine" ladies, Russian women are never oppressive or abusive, but rather soft-spoken. But at the same time not silly and submissive who cannot stand up for herself when injustice is done. As it is said in one of a world famous poem of the last century: "… There are women in Russian areas…. Beautiful faces, queen's walk, who would dare to stop a running horse, who are not scared to enter a burning house." So basically all such qualities are in Russian blood and taken root since many centuries before. All of these, fortunately for men, are in the Russian make-up and in their upbringing. Did you know that many Russian women are fond of Indian culture and movies? That they are very inclined to spirituality and mysticism?. Even the scripts of ballets such as Swan lake and many other pieces are specially re-written for Russians to make a happy ending. (for Russians the end MUST be a happy one). In short what one can say about Russian women in general: full of beauty, love, care and life. Treasures of pearl, with high consciousness of justice, who for goodness received will reward tenfold. With compliment MarryMeCity

         
    When cupid hits

     

    I used to live a simple, happy life. I call it happy, but it was more of a peaceful life. Happiness has different meanings at different times. Till a woman gives birth, she does not know what is happiness of being in love with the child. Is it not true? It was same with me. Talking of love, I had read quite a lot in books and seen many movies. But love, the emotion was unknown to me. Then I fell in love and my world changed suddenly. I cannot say that I used to see stars in bright sun light, but I can surely say that for me the days became as lovely as the nights. We used to share everything. I used to read my poetries to her on telephone and she listened. That simple sharing was heavenly. The same ice cream used to taste totally differently when we used to share from the same cup. What she bought for me was commonly available in the shops, but I used to wear those clothes as if they were directly delivered fro heaven. I can go on and on about what all we shared and loved. As I said before that I had read about love, but did not know about it. I came to know about love only after falling in love. If you are not in love, please fall in love. There is nothing comparable to love in giving joy. If you are already in love, please make use of every moment to experience it. Love comes as a blessing of God. Love is a blessing and one need not know about heaven if one is in love. Why one falls in love with a particular person? Why one feels different in love? Why one likes the feeling of love more than anything else? Why one forgets one's identity in love? And why one dies when the beloved leaves for no reason, is a mystery. Please enjoy life when you are in love. Enjoy every moment and live it.

         
    Who wants to live in a time bomb

     

    Here are a few reasons why you do not want to move in with a friend and some personal experiences from when I lived with my 2 best friends. Personal Space and Quiet time: When living with friends you will not have any privacy or quiet time, and the closer the friends you are the worse it will be. You may not realize it now but you are not always in the mood to be with your friends sometimes you may want to just sit in your room and relax, and if a friend called you up you could say you were busy but if you live with a friend they will be knocking on the door and bothering you all the time, and good friends will often borrow things of yours without asking you. Where as someone you found online will usually leave you alone when your door is closed except for something important. My old roommate would always go into my room to borrow my things no matter how much I asked her not to, and every time I asked she would get insulted because it was her so it should be ok with me. Finances: The reason why you moved in to an apartment is because you needed help being able to afford your expenses, and someone you don’t know will usually be more responsible with making sure they have the money to bay their half of the bills then a friend will, a friend will ask you to help them out when they are short on cash. One of my friends would always spend his rent or bill money in online casinos playing blackjack, or in poker rooms online. I like to play some poker online just as much as anyone else but I always made sure to not gamble in an online casino with my rent money. If I was short on money I would not gamble, but I would never allow myself to not have the money to pay my share of the bills. Cleaning of the Shared Spaces: In the past roommates I had found in the news paper always made sure that any space we shared like the kitchen or living room was kept clean. If you cooked something any mess was cleaned from the counter and pots, pans and plates would be put in the sink and were taken care of within 12 hours, but friends may take advantage of the slack you will give to a friend, because they know you would be ok with it. One friend of mine hated anything being left in the sink for any amount of time and if it was left fore more then an hr or 2 she would complain, so me and my other roommate started cleaning the dishes as soon as we were done with them, only to find that she would leave her dishes sometimes for days and when questioned about it she said that her seeing our dishes bothered her but her dishes did not bother her so it was ok for her to leave them. Power Consumption: Unless your roommate has lots of money and lets face it if they had cash they would not need a roommate, then they will be looking to save money and not want to waste money on electricity, and once you agree on things like using the dryer or air conditioning two roommates who meet online or from an add in the paper will usually respect the rules better then two friends will. Friends will usually bend the rules, like leaving the computer on all day or running the ac all night. My friends used to leave their Air conditionings on all day long and would often leave their rooms and even the apartment without turning them off, and instead of being more responsible for their actions they would make up excuses like "oops I forgot". These are just some of the many reasons you should avoid living with friends, especially if you want to keep them as friends. It is one thing if a friend needs a place to stay for a week or two but never ever let them move in.

         
    Why an online partner could be the best choice for marriage

     

    Selecting a mate should be the most crucial decision of our lives. But if it happens to fell in love we all are forgetting about any decision. We are like hypnotized, and even if our friends, family and even our ration is telling us that the person we love is not a good choice for us, we don’t give any importance to this. All what you know when you are deeply in love with someone is that you want her/him to be with you, as closer as it could be, and as longer as it could be. What is the answer to these expectations? You already know it: MARRIAGE! What happen after the marriage? In honeymoon all things go great: the hotel room is clean, the food at the restaurant is great and even if it isn’t, it is nobody faults. Am I right? But after this period you two had a lot of time together, things are starting to change. You start to see that your husband/wife doesn’t use a very elevate vocabulary, maybe she/he is not very interested in making a career like you supposed to, and eventually he/she has not to many qualities that you have expected in your life partner. You wake up from that state of hypnosis, you are starting to panic and argues are starting to be more and more frequent. It takes a good amount of time since you can accept that you have made a mistake. What’s next? Divorce I suppose. What I mean to tell is that romantic love is a poor basis for a marriage. In a long relationship, romance, sex and passion are pretty different to how they are in the initial states. We should spend a huge amount of time and energy trying to find that special someone. We should know closer someone before falling in love, and ONLINE DATING is giving us this possibility. By talking online we are protected of falling in love too deeply because the real chemistry can happen only when we are meeting someone face to face, when we can see his/her smile, when we can touch his/her skin, when we can feel his/her smell. In these conditions we are not missing the " decision" part, that moment when we are following our ration not our instincts. I am not saying that we should not follow our intuition or instincts but we never forget completely about our ration. Ration is what makes a difference between human beings and animals. Animals are making choices too by following their instincts only, but they are not having any bills to pay and neither have to find a subject to discus about while are taking the dinner. :) So protect yourself from falling in love with an inappropriate person, take the time to browse some online profiles and you will see how many opportunities you have. There are thousands of singles and some of them have those qualities you expect your future life partner to have. Just find your perfect match!

         
    Why are russian women so popular learn the secrets

     

    This topic has been debated many times but the question still exists: "Why do a lot of single men choose the finest Russian women, pretty girls, Russian ladies looking for men?" Frankly, I get asked this question a lot. What's so special about a Russian woman? If you ask yourself these questions, you'll probably find helpful information in this article. Stats. According to the latest census, Russia is home to 10 million more women then men, said State Statistics Committee head V. Sokolin. The number of women in their 30s exceeds the number of men significally. After the divorce, the woman with a kid (or with no kids) has little chance of getting married again in Russia, according to sociologists. There are no men in Russia to get married to: mortality rate of the working age males is extremely high. Keeping these stats in mind, check your dating opportunities in Russia as well. You will be shocked by the quality of Russian women looking for men. Beauty. The proverb 'Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder' confirms that tastes differ. The woman one man considers to be beautiful, another may think she is not. Effortless grace... Charming smile... Kindness... Beautiful cheekbones... Fair hair and skin...? Hard to choose... Possibly, it makes an irresistible mix. Let's see it by the eyes of men. This is how Western men describe a genuine Russian woman: "Slant to the eyes...", "I can't resist this stunning beauty...", "Russian women are the most beautiful women I have seen"... Should anything be added? However, nobody is able to judge by beauty alone. Let's see other finest Russian women's qualities. Family. The woman's marriage age in Russia is about 23-25 years old. It means a woman gets married comparatively young. At least she tries but fails (see the census).It looks unusual if a Russian woman at the age of 30 is still unmarried. She feels uncomfortable either. These are daily facts from the Russian woman's life: *Being highly educated, she would prefer a stable and happy family to her career; *Tireless commitment to her loved ones, she keeps the household herself; *Her husband is a partner and not a competitor; More facts? Love and romance. Russian woman's 'romantic sweetness' makes her search for a happy, fulfilling and loving relationship. She is extremely feminine, healthy, sexy, passionate, sensual and thankful. Love-making is not a hard work for her: it's the pleasure and the beauty of mutual satisfaction. The truth is that the Russian woman while making love is really making love ... She wants to see the excitement in you, so give it to her! You will not regret. Education. You will be pleasantly surprised at the educational level of the finest Russian ladies looking for American men and marriage. A university or college degree is a common thing. It's not a bluff. Don't forget they are spiritual. The tradition of reading books, attending concerts, museums is still alive in Russia. Pretty Russian girls are extremely teachable: you will not believe how quickly they are able to begin speaking a new language and adapt themselves to the new circumstances. Do you think it's easy to leave the country of birth, relatives, friends, the job, and the native language? Try... It's extremely difficult. Ideal image? This is sure a common portrait of the finest Russian women, pretty girls, Russian ladies looking for men and marriage abroad. If you take into account the general qualities as well as concentrate on the real woman, you'll be fine. Start focusing on the given woman, communicate with her, ask and answer questions, let her know that you are sincere. Be yourself, let her know that you care about her - any woman wants to be taken care of - how can you go wrong with that? The notion 'Russian woman' includes women from Ukraine and Belarus as well, as they have very much in common. There are exceptions so you should be very careful in your choice.

         
    Why couples running away together

     

    Elopement normally happens to troublesome teen couples. It includes not only the traditional form of eloping, where you head down to the local justice of the peace, but now, many couples are tying their knots in many exciting, out-of-the-ordinary ways. Most couples will have a day dream and start with exciting plans of a romantic, enjoyable traditional wedding. They dream up wild ideas for creating a memorable event to start their lives together. And then... reality hits. Family members dabble their fingers in the minute details. For example, Aunt Jan offers to sing her favorite love song, in operatic voice, while you want a cellist and pianist. In addition to your family intrusions, you can see your bank account and maybe your parent's as well, beginning to plummet from all the essentials that make a wedding successful. Estimates put the average American wedding in the $20,000 to $25,000 range. And since 30% of couples end up paying for their own wedding, this can often mean the difference between having a memorable one day event and having a down payment on a home. Plus, coordinating everything... from photographer, to location, to dates, to relatives, becomes an increasingly painful experience. Other factors have also played an important role in couples who elope. The average age of marrying couples has slowly risen since the 1950's. This has led to couples who are more independent and not as worried about pleasing parents and friends when they tie the knot. Also, due to high divorce rates, many second marriages lead couples to opt for smaller, more practical ceremonies. It also seems, in general, that social pressures have lessened in regards to non-traditional weddings. Some couples find they have lived together for several years, and finally decide they just want to legally consummate their relationship. In fact, a large portion of elopers, some independent statistics show up to 75%, actually plan their weddings months in advance. This is much different from the common perception of an instant, spontaneous wedding... which is often how we see elopers portrayed on TV and in the media. If you have hit that point, where you are tired of all the stressful planning, all the schedule juggling, and all the money draining from your account, then maybe it's time to stop. Relax! And think about the other wedding option... eloping. It seems that eloping is not a romantic idea at all. It is a wedding strategy that can lessen your stress and give you a lot of fun memories to share others.

         
    Why do people lie

     

    Amanda and Ron had been married for six years and had two small children. I had counseled them during some difficult times in their marriage, but had not heard from them for a while. Then Amanda scheduled an emergency phone session with me. She was very upset. “I just found out that Ron’s been watching porno on the Internet and lying to me about it. I had thought this was going on a couple of weeks ago because of a site I found on the computer, but when I asked him about it, he denied it and explained it away. He is not too computer savvy – he doesn’t know how to delete the sites - and today I found a number of sites he has visited. I can’t believe this! I’m very upset about the porno, but I’m devastated that he lied to me! I feel like the trust has gone out of our marriage, and without trust, what do we have? Why did he lie to me?” “Amanda, how would you have responded if he had told you the truth?” “I would have been really upset and disappointed in him. I probably would have gotten angry. We have a good sex life, so why is he using porno?” “Well, he lied to you because he knew that this is the way you would have reacted. His lying is his way of controlling your reactions, and your anger is your way of controlling his behavior. As long as you get angry when you hear the truth, the chances are he will lie to you. As your children get older, they, too, will lie to you to avoid your anger and judgment. It takes a very strong person to tell the truth and deal with another’s anger and judgment, and Ron is not that strong. He is very afraid of your anger and judgment and will do anything to avoid it, including lying.” “Are you saying it’s okay for him to lie to me?” “No, I’m not saying it’s okay or not okay. I’m not making a value judgment about it. You asked why he’s lying and I’m telling you why. Lying is just another form of protection against pain, just as your anger is a form of protection against pain.” “So what do I do? How do I deal with this?” “Amanda, you need to shift your intention from trying to control him to being open to learning about what is behind his behavior. From his point of view, there are some important reasons why he is using porno, and why he is lying about it. Trying to control him will only result in more lying and resistance, but wanting to learn can result in understanding and resolution. You need to approach him with caring and a desire to learn rather than with anger and judgment – about both the porno and the lying. You would need to say something like, ‘Ron, I know that you have been going to porno sites on the Internet. Please don’t lie about it anymore. I know there must be some good reasons you are doing this and I really want to understand what it’s about for you.’ However, you have to be aware that the words themselves are less important than the intent behind them. If you say these same words with anger and judgment, he will be defensive. Don’t ask until you feel genuinely open and caring.” Lying is always a form of control. Some people are pathological liars, having learned that they get a rush from manipulating others with lies. But most people lie when they are afraid of the consequences of telling the truth. Lying may be one end of a relationship system, with anger and judgment on the other end. Whether the relationship is a primary one between mates or between parents and children, or a relationship between friends or between co-workers, lying may be a part of it when fear of anger and judgment is an issue. Most people do not know how to handle another’s anger and judgment and may revert to being the child they were when they learned to lie to their parents to avoid punishment. If you want to trust that people are not going to lie to you, then you need to shift your intention in your relationships from controlling to learning.

         
     
         
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