: The world we live on is nothing but a mound of chaotic pressure that is building to the point it bursts like a volcano. We are bombarded with pressure from our employers, our customers and families to the point where some people actually do break. Most of us today in professional lives spend between 8 and 16 hours a day at the office, which equates to almost two-thirds of our lives being in a place we really do not want to be in, but there are things you can do to decrease the stress in your office. Remember this, what we call stress, is really what we put on ourselves. Whilst other people can influence the way we feel, ultimately we are the ones who choose whether we are going to be stressed or not. You are in control of how you are going to feel, no one else. Stress as such is going on in our heads, so the real secret to de-stressing is to find things that would make you happy and content within. #1. Have a Photo Of The Happiest Time In Your Life Think back through your life, what is the happiest moment in your life. It could be the birth of your child, getting married, going out on a fantastic date, visiting some outstanding place or maybe it is when you bought your puppy dog but no matter what it is, you will almost certainly have a photo of that time. Take that photo and put it on your desk to remind you of those happy times as this will be one of the tools you need to beat stress in your office. The happiest time in my life, and where I felt like the luckiest man in the world, was the day my wife stepped out of the limousine at the church for our wedding. I had never seen my wife look so beautiful and I made sure when I felt those feelings that I would remember them forever. So on my desk at work, I have a picture of my wife getting out of the limousine and each time I feel stressed I simply take a few moments to look at that picture and remember that moment in time. You brain is an amazing part of your body, no matter how many times I look at that photo, my brain releases the same feelings I had on the day and helps me snap out of feeling stressed. Use the happy times, to control the times when you feel the most vulnerable and stressed. #2. Think Of Your Boss Yelling At You Naked Everyone has nightmare stories of their bosses being a grouch and I certainly have had my fair share, but most people who talk of being excessively stressed often relate that stress to a boss who is abusive and yells a lot. Well first off, if you are working in an environment where you boss is abusive, get out NOW! Nobody has to put up with that and remember life is way to short regardless of the money. Is money worth that much that the stress is worth dying tomorrow from a heart attack? NO! However, if you have a boss who yells at you a lot, just for the sake of yelling and really is quite rude, simply imagine them yelling at you naked. If someone flew into your office absolutely starkas, that is with absolutely no clothes on, would you take them seriously. Course not! So, why take a boss that comes in and yells at you seriously. If your boss is an effective communicator he or she would not need to yell at you. The next time your boss comes in, force yourself to think of them absolutely naked. When you do that, see just how you actually react and whether you deal with the situation better than when they are yelling at you absolutely naked. After a bit of practice you will find you are able to handle the situation much better and cope with a grouchy boss. #3. Get Up and Do Some Office Exercises Look no one on the planet can deny that doing exercise, gets the blood going and burns off the stress however sneaking away during the day can be really difficult but there are other Office Exercises that can bring you a lot of benefit to you. There are many office exercises that you can do like rolling your shoulders, clenching your hands and releasing them and even neck exercises that will help release the stress. Often, much of our built up stress is simply due to sitting at the computer all day looking at the screen. Make sure that every hour you get up and stretch for at least five minutes. You will find that if you do not do that over a period of time this will lead to aches and pains, which can help increase your stress. To get the best Office Exercises for you to do simply talk to your General Practitioner or visit a Physiotherapist and they will be able to help you develop an Office Exercise plan and you will be surprised how much easier life is to cope with. #4. Schedule Enough Time to Go From One Meeting To Another I worked for a bank about five years ago and I have never met an organisation that has so many meetings. My whole days constituted going from one meeting to another and I learnt one very important lesson. If I did not run my schedule my meetings would. Make sure that when you schedule an appointment or a meeting that you include travel time to and from a meeting. Whilst working for this firm, if you did not schedule travel time, they would simply book meetings next to each other even if the meeting was across the other side of the city. They would simply expect you to immediately appear at that other meeting. Message to All Humans - we do not have an instant teleporter, the Stargate is a fantasy, so make sure you give yourself enough time to get from one meeting to another or you are going to stress out. #5. Plan Your Day We talked about scheduling time to get from one meeting to another in the previous point but there is an extension to this. Make sure YOU plan your day, not your business associates. All too often I hear management say, "I did not get lunch today" or " I have been on the run and have not had a chance to stop"e on, get a grip, you are in control and it is up to you. The first thing you should do in every job you work in, is to make sure you schedule two decent breaks a day which include at least half an hour for lunch and a 20 minute break somewhere else in the day. If you are like most people you will be using something like Microsoft Outlook or Lotus Notes to manage your day. Both allow you to schedule unavailable time in your calendar, so do IT! By scheduling YOU time, you can ensure you have enough time to have a break, do a little meditation and relax and prepare for the rest of the day. If you are like me and work 16 hours a day, then you should also be putting into your plan a decent Dinner break of at least an hour and half an hour at the gym, even if it is just using the treadmill. If you do not do this, it will catch you up to you and you will be a statistic at 40. Do not laugh, my leading hand lost his life because he did not do the right thing. It can happen to you. #6. Limit the Amount of Time Spent Dealing With Emails Technology is a wonderful thing, but when technology rules your life, then you have a big problem and very quickly technology like email can overwhelm you causing you to become stressed. One of the rules my team and I have in the office is that nobody must respond to emails for more than 60 minutes per day. The reason we have put this rule into place, is that many of my team and our corporate clients spend their whole day emailing each other rather than dealing with the issues at hand. How often have you received an email on one topic and then have the content of the email go off in another direction right before your eyes? I was working in one corporate organisation as an external consultant and very often all I would do is simply respond to emails all day long and get nothing done. Most of the emails could have been dealt with a 2 second phone call. In one of the offices I was working in, it was an open plan office layout and I had a bloke working directly across from me, who refused to speak to me or anyone else on the floor and all he did was when he had an issue, he would send an email. This is a crazy way to do business and it does not work and only causes technology stress. My solution, each time he emailed me, I simply spoke the answer back to him. He got the point after a while and my email load went down when he spoke to me rather than emailed me. Technology is supposed to make life easier, not take over your life, so if you have a question and the person is sitting in the next office, get up and knock on their door and ask the question. By doing this you are undertaking item number 6 which is limiting your emails and item number 3 which is get up and do some office exercises. That little bit of walking will help get the blood flowing through you veins. #7. Be Prepared To Say "NO!" We all want to get ahead in the world today and I am sure in everyone there is a little part of us that wants to live the life of Bill Gates and Donald Trump and be as rich as them. However, most of us make the mistake of simply saying yes to everything that is thrown at us. Now whilst that is great to say yes, people like Bill Gates and Donald Trump have teams of people to help them, and in all honesty you maybe on their teams, but all of us are only human and sometimes we simply have to say "NO!" Where is the point in saying to our bosses, "Yes we will have this 500 page report written for you tomorrow". When in reality there is absolutely no chance of that occurring. Sometimes in this world you simply have to say no and that does not go just for the boss, it also goes for the customers as well. My team and I have a seven day schedule across the various businesses I run and whilst we do not all work seven days a week, sometimes we do work six days a week to get through our responsibilities. One weekend I had one of our customers, mind you it was 6:30 am on a Sunday morning demand one of my team from our car cleaning business, drop everything and clean their car at 7:00am because an important family member was coming. There were many responses I could have given, but my simple answer was NO! The customer ranted and raved for about 10 minutes by which time I was imagining them naked yelling at me, which really was a funny site and then when they were finished and I simply asked them would they be prepared to work all week including Saturday and Sunday for the next 2 weeks and their reply was "NO, My Weekends Are My Own and I am not working them for anyone." Then I simply responding by saying to them, then there is your answer and I hung up. You know the funny thing, they rang me on Monday morning and apologised and we did the top car cleaning service on their car the following week. I charged them more as well. Most customers will accept the answer of No when they understand why you are saying No. Some will not, but then do you really need them as customers anyway. #8. Take your shoes off and walk on the carpet This is my favorite de-stressing activity and it shocks the living daylights out of everyone. I first met a lady about 10 years ago who was in her early fortys and nothing seemed to shake her stature. She was always calm and never got flustered and I asked her what her secret was and she said, "I always take my shoes off as often as possible so I can stay in touch with the earth". This was a really prominent statement for me, because I never really thought of my shoes as a tool to disconnect us from our surroundings but if you think about it, it makes sense. If you go down to the beach, what is the first thing you do. You take off your shoes to feel the sand through you feet and how does it make you feel, relaxed. If you go to the park with the children, what do you do? Take your shoes off so you can run around and have fun or to play in the mud. Whether we realise it or not, when we disconnect ourselves from mother earth we really do start to stress. I now always take my shoes off when I am working in my office, including my socks just so I can feel something more inspirational under my feet rather than just the hard soles of my shoes. I know another corporate CEO in Brisbane Australia, who used to walk down to Anzac Square every lunch hour to walk on the grass so that he could stay in touch with the world. Hey, if it works in the movie Pretty Woman, surely it must work. #9. Play Music Listening to the right type of music is really important when you are trying to reduce stress and find your inner peace. Some music when listened to, whilst stressed, can in fact heighten your stress levels. One type of music, which research has shown to help reduce stress is Baroque music. This music is written so that there is only 60 beats per minute and funny enough that is what our heart rate should be. The baroque music has been found to increase the alpha waves in your left and right sides of your brain which help improve your learning ability, creativity and calmness. Whilst you are working in the office on a demanding piece of work, simply put in a CDROM of music and listen to it as you are completing the work, but honestly do watch the type of music you are listening to or it can back fire. Most corporate organisations are now realising the benefit of staff listening to music during the day and with 90% of corporate computers having CDROMs, it is possible to listen to music on your computer whilst doing your work, you may just need headphones. I work in hundreds of corporate organisations a year and only one had a no music policy and that was because they were a call centre, which I can understand. There is no reason why you can not listen to music during your break though to ensure you a feeling calm before hitting those phones again. #10. Meditate Okay, I can hear it now, "Oh Yeah Hippy, Want Us to Meditate do ya." Absolutely! Look whilst meditation has certainly been a thing of fringe groups in western society or associated with more eastern religions many researchers are now coming to the distinct conclusion that meditation can make a huge difference to our day-to-day lives and helps us to overcome stress. The core advantage meditation will play in your office is to help you to relax and deal with challenging situations more effectively. The more relaxed you are the more creative you can be in dealing with any issues that arise. I certainly recommend that when you are meditating, that you use baroque music with your meditation as it will help increase the alpha waves which will help lead you to a calm feeling. This is especially useful if you do not have a long period to meditate. I recommend a 20 minute meditation session at least once a day preferably two. You will be really surprised the difference it makes to your day. Just try it out, you have nothing to loose and the rest of your life to gain The office environment in these millennia is far more stressful than they were a century ago, but there are things you can do about it but it is up to you. Remember, we only have one life and it is not a dress rehearsal so get out and reduce the stress your office gives you and have some fun. To finish off let me reiterate the ten things you can do to reduce your stress at the office. #1. Have a Photo Of The Happiest Time In Your Life#2. Think Of Your Boss Yelling At You Naked#3. Get Up and Do Some Office Exercises#4. Schedule Enough Time to Go From One Meeting To Another#5. Plan Your Day#6. Limit the Amount of Time Spent Dealing With Emails#7. Be Prepared To Say "NO!" #8. Take your shoes off and walk on the carpet#9. Play Music#10. Meditate
This article looks into the causes of stress and gives free tips to help you control and reduce your worries. I have, as I am sure many people do, stressed for most of my life for many different reasons. Even though I still worry about many things, I have now learned how to handle many of these situations and will write about how I go about doing this, in this article. I am the kind of person who likes to have a simple and settled life. When something comes along which is quite a big event or a bit out of the ordinary, this is when I start to stress. I am not the kind of person who likes change, therefore things like moving house is something which will cause me a lot of stress. I have actually moved house four times in the last six years, not very clever for someone like me. I am now happy where I live and plan to stay at this abode for a long time. I am also self-employed. There are many things I love about being self-employed, the fact that I am my own boss, I can choose my own hours, I have no-one to answer or to report to and the all round freedom it gives me. I often stress however that business will go through a bad period and that I do not have the security of a regular income. How will I pay the mortgage? How will I pay my car loan? How will I feed and clothe my children? These are all the things that at times can keep me awake at night. I now have started to build up a back-up fund in a bank account. When business is doing well, I put as much money as I can into this account, which I can then use in the leaner times. This gives me a peace of mind and therefore I do not have to worry so much. Business will go through good and bad periods and this way I can easily cope when it does go slow. I used to also worry about how I would pay my tax bill at the end of the year, however I have also started to put money away each month similar to the above example, to pay for it. I now try and think about all of my worries in a logical manner and instead of losing sleep over them I try to find solutions. I also feel stressed and I am not sure why it is, the day after I have a night out drinking alcohol. In the morning and nowadays since I am getting older, throughout the day, I often feel lethargic and my mind starts to play tricks on me. It makes me feel negative about the future and makes me worry about a whole host of issues. It now takes me around forty-eight hours to recover from a boozy night out and affects my family and work life. I have now decided that I will go out far less and that when I do, I will limit the amount I drink. These are other things that can cause me to stress: When I have worked too hard! When I have had a lack of sleep During and after an illness After an argument with my girlfriend When I am invited to a social occasion which I do not want to go to, such as a wedding A visit from my girlfriends family for say a weekend Going on holiday Some of the above may seem a bit bizarre to some people who read this article, however I am trying to be truthful. Yes going on holiday does cause me to worry. I do not like flying for a start, I worry that I or a member of my family may become ill or that the hotel may not be as good as what was described in the brochure. One thing which I am now careful to ensure of, is that I get enough sleep. I must say I love going to bed and I love sleeping. My bed is where I feel safe and comfortable. I used to fall into a trap of working too hard and would then stay up late, possibly watching the television. I would set my alarm to wake me up early and I would then start the whole process over again. From reading a book about stress management, I discovered that sleep was one of the best forms of stress-relief. I decided to give it a go and I must say it works. I now stay in bed an hour later in the mornings and where possible, I am in bed by 10pm at night. I am also now attempting to take life in my stride. What happens will happen and I will deal with each challenge on its own merit. I try to deal with potential problems in a positive way and realise that if life was very smooth and easy, that it would probably be quite boring. I now appreciate what I have in life and instead of looking at the future full of dread, I look forward to what life will bring. I know that at times life will be hard and am determined to get through these periods as quick as I can. Nowadays when I do feel down and miserable, I tend to spend as much time as possible with my children, as they make me happy and can soon put a smile back onto my face.
A language teacher had problems with one of his students. The student was weak in learning the spellings of the words. He was weaker in memory. He repeated and wrote those words many a times, yet when it mattered, he spelled them incorrectly! The problem words were: Mathematics and Stephenson! The teacher provided him an easy technique to learn the spellings and said - ‘So, by tomorrow, you need to be thorough in these words, said the teacher!’ ‘Tomorrow never comes madam, you told me so, I will tell the correct spellings of the words, just now!’ said the enthusiastic student! The tips given by the teacher, made it so easy. What teacher did was to fragment the words. The shape of mathematics was mat-he-mat-ics! Stephenson was Step-hen-son! Stress management tips are also some what like that! Do not make a big burden of your stress. With some imaginative handling of the situation, the load of iron bars can turn into a load of cotton! Here are some of the stress management tips: 1. Just go for a brisk walk, and try to make it a part of your daily routine. Let it be a stress free walk - don’t you remember the poem that you sang in chorus at the primary school level, ‘Work while you work, play while you play that is the way to be happy and gay.’ The times have now arrived to translate the words, all those goody goody poems and proverbs that you crammed to score high percentage in your language paper, into reality. 2. It is better not to have foes. But if you have one, avoid him. Because his poisonous tongue is the root cause of your mental agitations. Have friendship with people with genuine feelings. 3. Avoid doing what upsets you most. 4. Be a practical man and do not imbibe too much idealism in your personality. Give clearcut answers and don’t be vague. Know your limitations and do not promise that, that you can not fulfill. A definite NO is far better than a confusing, vague YES. 5. Join a social, spiritual or a socio-spiritual organization. Being helpful to the society, is a great feeling that will relieve much of your tension. 6. Take the advise of a specialist, if the nature of your stress is too pressing. If you think that you have reached a point of no return. These experienced counselors have practical solutions, in their quiver! 7. Let not your life be like an overloaded truck. Unload yourself; unburden yourself. 8. Be ever calm. Be positive, even the worst situation will do you no harm. Stress management tips are just the indicators. You have to develop your own strategy to manage stress. ‘You are the creator of your own destiny-not the victim’. Understand this golden rule well!
: If you suffer stress from the tedium of boring, repetitive, and meaningless work, then it’s time you changed your attitude. Simply by seeing work as adventure, service, ritual, self-expression, and meaningful, you can transform the very nature of the daily grind. 1. Work as Adventure. Many people might laugh at you if you suggested that a humdrum job could become an adventure. But here are three ways you can turn every day of working life into one of surprise and discovery. Make it… • a challenge, in which you create our own targets. "I'm going to be the best cocktail-maker in town."; "I want to complete the dish-washing in the fastest time." • learning, in which you develop your curiosity about the job, how things are made and work, as well as trying out new skills to see if the job can't be done in a better way. • a game, in which you create interest and fun by injecting a new twist into the job, such as the bartender who took to compiling lists of barstool bores. When work is seen as an adventure, with new things to explore and learn, you’ll look forward to Monday mornings with a new-found spirit of wonder. 2. Work as Service. Much of the stress we experience in the workplace originates from an excessive pre-occupation with ourselves and others with whom we work. Some of the particularly strained relationships we can experience arise out of... • internal politicking • departmental rivalries • poor or mismanaged relationships • game-playing • bad supervision and management of people. While these situations are not solved overnight, we can make major changes in how we see them and how we feel when we shift our perceptions from an internal to an external focus, from ourselves to others, from those we work with to those we work for. Then work ceases to be about us and our survival and becomes an act of service. 3. Work as Ritual. When we see work as ritual, no matter how mundane it may be, it is lifted into something more meaningful. We do it not for the rewards but for its own sake. It is like the Zen Buddhist monk who sweeps the snow from the monastery steps even while it is snowing - simply because it is snowing.
• when we see work as ritual, it becomes absorbing • when we see work as ritual, the minutest details are as valuable as the grandest gestures • when we see work as ritual, we connect with it, become part of it, are joined in the rhythm of it • when we see work as ritual, we develop a natural pace and flow and go with it as in a dance. “The best work is done without strain, as if we had no goal in mind.” 4. Work as Self-Expression. When we perform routine work, we have the choice whether to see it as a chore and a means to an end or to turn it into something special. When work is made special, it becomes an art form: a way of putting on theatre; a form of self-expression. This can apply to the way we make a slab of pizza dough, to the way we stack supermarket shelves, to the way we take care of the school hall. No matter how repetitive and routine, each act can have our own distinctive stamp on it. "I don't like work - no man does - but I like what is in work: the chance to find yourself, your own reality - for yourself, not for others - what no other man can ever know." (Joseph Conrad) 5. Work as Meaningful. Much of the stress of routine work comes from not knowing -- or seeing -- the results of our efforts.
Warren Bennis is professor of management at the University of Southern California in San Diego, a particularly parched part of the state. Every day when he goes in to work, he notices the beautifully-kept lawns and flower beds and wonders: “Does anyone ever thank the gardeners for lifting our spirits?” When we know what our work does for others, whether routine or creative, we get a glimpse of our significance in the bigger scheme of things.
Marilyn Ferguson says that we can transform the stress and boredom of our daily work by changing our attitude. "New attitudes change the very experience of daily work. Work becomes a ritual, a game, a discipline, an adventure, learning, even an art as our perceptions change. The stress of tedium and the stress of the unknown, the two causes of work-related suffering are transformed.
A more fluent quality of attention allows us to move through tasks that once seemed repetitious or distasteful. We see that meaning can be discovered and expressed in any human service: cleaning, teaching, gardening, carpentry, selling, caring for children, driving a taxi."
Wherever you are right now, stop everything (this is important). Take just a moment and sit back in your seat. Now, put your hands on your abdomen with you fingertips barely touching. On your next inhale separate your fingertips by breathing deeply and slowly into your belly, allowing your breath to push them apart. Then exhale slowly so that your fingertips come back together. When you’ve finished, try it again. There. That’s it…THE key to unlocking the door to your own growth and evolvement, to managing and actually reducing the stress in your life, and to setting in motion a small but resounding ripple in the betterment of the world. Sound ridiculous? Are you wondering how one deep breath can claim to accomplish so much? The answer lies not in the biological functioning of the breath, but in its ability to focus attention, to bring mind and body into sync and release the present from concerns over the past or future. And when this happens time and space is created for deepening self-knowledge and awareness, which in turn leads to more purposeful, engaged and inspired living. Sitting quietly for five, ten, twenty minutes a day, following your breath, is a good way to begin creating a personal practice of what is called “mindfulness.” In today’s speed-of-light world, it’s common to feel scattered…for the mind to be thinking about one thing, while the heart reaches toward another and the body hangs out in the space-time continuum. Mindfulness is about bringing all these aspects of the self together. It’s about becoming fully and deeply present, aware of each passing moment. And the simplest, easiest and best place to begin is the breath. Though it won’t stop there. When you become intentional in the practice of being mindful a deeper process will be triggered. The ability to focus on your own inner experience and to become fully present will begin to flow into every aspect of your life…into your words, and thoughts and actions…into your relationships and work and personal endeavors. You will wake and realize that you are, maybe for the first time, actually experiencing the moments of your existence. But how does that transfer to saving the world? Peace, and all roads that lead to it and from it, begin with the individual. Peaceful individuals create peaceful homes, create peaceful communities, create peaceful nations, create a peaceful world. To truly make progress in your own growth and development…to make the deepest impact possible on the state of the planet, begin with your self. Learn the art of mindfulness. Devote 2…5…10…30 minutes a day to practicing presence. Take time each day to show up fully. Get to know yourself. Create your own personal practice. It can include anything that stills the mind, quiets the heart, calms the spirit, inspires the soul…breathing, meditation, walking, prayer, dance, art, journaling …the purpose is to take time to be in this world of doing, to bring peace to your self so that when you venture into the world you carry it with you like a lantern you pass on to others. So take another moment, another breath. But this time, breathe like you mean it. It is the key to your own growth, and just may be the key to the healing of the world.
Think about all that has happened in the world in the past few years: 9/11 and thousands losing their lives, terrorists who live and breathe to take away freedom, hurricanes that have completely taken away the foundation of several states, mud slides that have wiped away houses, floods that have killed and ruined, earthquakes that have swallowed up entire cities, riots and gunmen who have terrorized people, the war that haunts us every day and the list goes on. Hundreds of thousands of people have been uprooted and have been forced to move elsewhere to get on with their lives, and millions are dealing with a more stressful world. As someone who has lived through several crisis’ such as having a baby at 28 weeks after laying in the hospital for 4 weeks upside down, living in NYC during 9/11, losing my business as a result, and 2 moves out of state in the past 5 years, I know a little bit about surviving a trauma and dealing with the stress. It’s hard. It shakes you to your core, but it can be done. Here is what to expect: I’ve guessed it can take up to about 3 months for the numbness to really wear off and for the stress to hit. It creeps up on you as a sense of overwhelm, and then the nerves start taking over and then POW. Full blown TENSION. I remember when the people in Oklahoma were on TV counseling the residents of NYC after 9/11. They said that they weren’t worried about them immediately following, but up to a year later. I remember hearing that and didn’t exactly know what it meant. Then, I lived through it. The Christmas immediately following 9/11 was the worst one in history for everyone I knew. After speaking with my friends in NY, everyone admitted that being with family that holiday season was full of anger, fights and lose tempers. Everyone seemed happy to go back to their own nest after the holidays. I remember that one too. My sister and I had the biggest blowout of our lives. My parents had to mediate and I remember regretting several things I said. The stress hits the families hard. The parents fight, and the kids suffer. The kids bring it to school and it affects others. Since we are all connected somehow, it’s hitting everyone in some capacity. First of all, recognize that everyone is going to go through their own personal trauma. Explain it to everyone that has gone through something difficult that it IS going to happen. Warn them to not be caught off guard. Next, seek encourage those who have gone through a change to seek counsel. If it’s from a friend, a professional, a priest or rabbi, whomever, get HELP. It helps to talk about what has happened. When a person can say the words out loud, hope can be established. The worst thing is to try to handle the stress and pressure internally. THIS is how people snap! They let the stress build up and then they POP. It’s natural. Think of a balloon. It can only handle so much air until it breaks. People are the same. Hard exercise should be a part of every day. Getting out the aggression by running, walking, lifting weights or punching a bag is a very therapeutic thing to do. And most importantly, spiritual support is the most important. We know that God understands our fears, our hurts and our pains. When it’s too much for us to handle, reach the scriptures that can give so much comfort, then give it over to God. Then release it and have the faith that He’s working. He can give us ideas that can help solve our issues. He can bring people into our path that can help us with our needs and even think for us when our brains seem to be frozen. Our world is at a boiling pot right now. People’s relationships and lives are in danger of dealing with too much. It’s time to reach out to others if you’re blessed with comfort and peace right now. All you have to do is ask your neighbors, “how are you doing?” If you do that to the people you see, you’ll find people who are in need. Then God can begin a good work through you.
How often do you find yourself wondering what is the best possible way to reduce the stress in your life? You are just an average person with a normal life, decent work hours, and a family to care for; yet you can’t help but court stress in every aspect of your life. Be it presentations at work, failing to be at your daughter’s fancy dress competition, or forgetting your anniversary…you seem to be meeting stress at every corner. And you have been spending hours mulling over what is the best possible way to reduce stress – have you ever thought of trying hypnotherapy for stress management? Stress has slowly seeped into every aspect of our life, and we often find ourselves blaming the fast paced life, the rat race and anything else that we can think of. We often think of stress as a negative force, something which will lead to nervous breakdowns and heart attacks. While I counsel my clients during hypnotherapy for stress management sessions, I often tell them that they should learn to look at stress not just as a negative factor; the truth is that stress can be a positive force as well. Don’t believe me? Well, look at this way…it is stress which drives us to do better, to put in our best efforts into anything we do. It is stress that pushes us to work towards our goals or helps us get out of a rut. We often increase our stress by stressing about stress! Sounds confusing, well it is. Stress as a force confounds our brain, and hinders our ability to think straight. That’s why we end up doing stupid things when we are stressed. Have you ever found yourself wondering why you fought with your spouse/partner while at work; the issue that you fought upon seems trivial to you now. This is the classic byproduct of stress; most people who are stressed out tend to do things without thinking them through, their thinking abilities are blocked either by anxiety, fear or confusion. It’s like the wiper on your mind’s windshield suddenly fails to function. Hypnotherapy for stress management enables you to understand stress for what it is; by working on the rules of relaxation and positive reinforcements, hypnosis helps you get to a calmer state of mind where you begin to see things clearly again. Hypnotherapy for stress management also makes you realize the cause of the stress and slowly nudges you towards dealing with those causes. With the help of techniques and auto suggestion, it instructs your subconscious mind to deal with a situation better. Let’s face it, we live in a very hectic world and all of us seem to be running around for something or the other. More often than not, we fail to take out time for ourselves from our busy lives. We don’t find the time to relax, to put up our feet up and forget every care in the world. We get stuck into a routine which seems impenetrable. The first way that hypnotherapy for stress management helps you during stressful times is that it provides the perfect opportunity to relax. It lets you drift into a comfort zone where you rediscover yourself; the hypnosis guides you towards using stress as a positive force in your life. It also helps you remember things that make you happy, and helps your mind retreat to these happy images and places every time you are negatively stressed out. The antidote to stress is relaxation; and hypnotherapy for stress management gives you the perfect excuse to relax. So go ahead, they hypnotherapy and relax away your stresses!
Life can offer us many challenges having to do with loss. When we are faced with relationship loss, financial loss, loss of health, loss of limb, loss of regard, or loss of love, we can feel overwhelmingly anxious, depressed and stressed. When the anxiety, depression and stress get too big, we may have a nervous breakdown – that is, we become incapable of functioning in our everyday life and incapable of coping with our daily challenges. What causes one person to have a nervous breakdown while another, with equally difficult or even more difficult challenges, is able to stay functioning and even optimistic? Imagine a seven year old child trying to cope with a big loss in his or her life, like the loss of a parent. What enables the seven year old to handle this loss? A seven year old can handle the loss only when there is a loving adult helping him or her with the loss. When there is no loving adult helping with the loss, the child may handle the loss by shutting down. The shutting down may lead to a loss of functioning, such as doing poorly in school. However, when the child does not feel alone with the loss – when there is love sustaining the child from an adult source – this child will be able to cope with the feelings of loss. The same is true for us as adults. We all have a very hard time with loss when we feel alone with it, but we can manage it when we are not alone. However, we cannot always rely on others to be here for us in times of loss, stress and overwhelm. Those people who have family and friends to always turn to for emotional and financial support during times of loss are fortunate indeed. But there are many people who are not so fortunate. Without others to turn to, we need to be able to turn to a reliable inner source of love to make it through and not feel alone. This reliable source needs to be our own inner spiritually connected loving Adult self. Those people who are able to manage loss without losing functioning are those people who do not feel alone inside because they have developed a strong loving Adult self. I define the loving Adult as the part of us that is open to learning from and connected with a spiritual source of love, wisdom and guidance. It is the part of us that takes loving action in our own behalf, nurtures us when we feel fear and grief, and operates from the truth from Spirit rather than from the lies of our wounded self – our ego. Just as children can manage loss when there is a loving adult to help them, the child in us can manage loss when we have a strong, spiritually connected loving Adult self to help us. As a loving Adult we know we are never alone. We know we are always being loved, sustained and guided by a spiritual Source. It is often not enough to have a strong religious or spiritual connection. If you have not been using that connection to develop your loving Adult self, then there is no part of you to bring love and comfort to yourself when you most need it, and no part of you that can take loving action for yourself, especially when things are overwhelming. People who have nervous breakdowns are people who are not operating from a loving Adult in their everyday lives. They are able to function as long as things go well, but when things fall apart, as they often do in life, these people may also fall apart. Without a loving Adult to bring the love and truth of Spirit to them, they end up feeling too alone to manage loss. The Inner Bonding process we teach is a very powerful process for developing a strong loving Adult self. When Inner Bonding is practiced consistently, the loving Adult naturally develops. We all can develop enough personal power and a deep enough spiritual connection to sustain us during the difficult times. We don’t have to be at the mercy of life’s challenges. Practicing the 6 Steps of Inner Bonding is like putting money in the bank for when it might be needed. The more you practice the process and develop the loving Adult, the easier it is to handle life’s big challenges as they arise.
Before the age of twenty-two I used to think I was one of the most unluckiest people in the world. My life seemed to be such a struggle compared to other people who seemingly breezed through life. I was caught up in a web of negativity and needed someone or something to help me to escape. Then I met a man who was around fifty while working on a project at work. We were having a chat one day when he stated that I was a depressive person who rarely smiled. What he said was quite upsetting and disturbing, however would have a profound effect on my future. In a shocked state I denied the accusation but be continued, yes you are, you very rarely smile, you are negative about most issues and you always seem to be carrying the world on your shoulders. This man was aged around fifty three and continued, I used to be like you and then I was given some advice, of which I am now going to relay to you. When you feel down, depressed or sorry for yourself, read the newspapers or watch the news on the television. You may then realise that you are in fact one of the lucky ones. I listened and thought about what he had said. I had never been a big reader or watcher of the news, but decided to start. The advice was totally correct, the news from around the world and even my own country was quite shocking. I realised that the worries I had were actually quite trivial and that I needed to cherish everyday and start to look on the bright side of life. In reality worrying about a particular situation does not help you, what I now try and do is to find a solution to whatever it is I am stressing about by thinking positive and taking a pro-active stance. This is not always easy as the negative demons in my mind are constantly working to bring me down. I see it as a battle and the demons as a bully and am determined not to let them win. Stephen Hill
Ask a literary person how to deal with stress & he will say you, do it the way Shakespeare, Wordsworth & Shelley did. Or, read the positivity of their writings and you will be stress free. Ask a modern stress management guru & he will come out with a whole set of CDs, manuals and modern techniques to beat the stress. …different people have different ways to mar the stress. What do you prefer? The object is one Stress Management. Let’s find out one by one how you can lead a stress free life. Step 1: Gush into the literature: “UNDER the greenwood tree, Who loves to lie with me, And turn his merry note Unto the sweet bird’s throat, Come hither, come hither, come hither: Here shall he see No enemy But winter and rough weather –William Shakespeare Then let not what I cannot have My cheer of mind destroy; Whilst thus I sing, I am a king, Although a poor blind boy. –Colley Cibber Its simple. Just read the above lines again and again, and get at the meaning of the words, through your heart! Step 2: Introspect What is stress? Stress is the state of your mind! What is mind? Mind is a bundle of thoughts. When your mind unnecessarily ponders about the bundle of thoughts, stress takes control of your personality! What is the solution then? The stressful thoughts will have to be changed to sincere and pleasing thoughts - and as the wise saying goes: When the Thoughts are changed, the Mind is changed, When the Mind is changed, the Man is changed, When the Man is changed, the Society is changed, When the Society is changed, the Nation is changed, And when the Nations change for the better, we say there is plenty and prosperity all over the world! It is so simple-oh, man, you have complicated the issue, beyond the tolerable proportions and that is the reason for your stress! Step 3: The modern stress management techniques: All the modern stress management techniques, the lengthy lectures on causes of stress, the bulky books on the subject, become a kindergarten stuff, as compared to your ability to control your mind. When you establish control on the rapid and agile movements of the mind, where is stress? Do not think that by controlling the mind, you are curbing its normal and useful activities. It is just like the horse, galloping ahead, but well-controlled by the jeans! If the stress is related to your health, it is another matter, it needs to be tackled in consultations with health professionals and good psychologists. Severe health problems, combined with stress, can be fatal also. Share your views, sorrows and health related concerns with your friends and well-wishers. You may get valuable advise and unburdening the stressful thoughts in your mind, will itself relieve you to a great extent! The mind tools, thus, have a definite role to play in taking the stress out of your personality.
Twenty-first century life can be defined using one word - stressful! The noise, the deadlines, money, expectations, and time restraints. Sleep deprivation and food cravings, where does it all end? As busy as we are, taking care of all the things that pass our way, the truth is that we create an enormous amount of stress for ourselves. Our minds are stress factories, constantly taking in information, processing it, and creating unnecessary panic that we add to our drained emotions. The good news is that you can do something about this! The truth is, sometimes we just think too much. We spend hours thinking about things we have to do, things we want to say, things we want to buy or find, etc. We replay our mistakes over and over in our heads. No wonder we have no energy! Instead of using your time and energy storing all this stuff in your head, put your thoughts on paper. 1. Things to do One wing of this mental stress factory is named, "Things I have to do." Don't rely on your memory to get you to all your important appointments. When it fails you you'll be three times as upset. Maintain lists of things to do, and mark next to each task how long the task will take. Number tasks in the order in which you should perform them or group them by priority. This will help you break your larger projects into smaller tasks so they don't seem overwhelming, and will prevent you from forgetting important deadlines. When you assign each task a time limit, you can also schedule them right into your day planner. Then you can see that you only have to struggle through your thesis in thirty-minute increments, and then you're free to go out and play. Bonus! 2. Things to say The stress factory in our heads has another wing named, "What I want to say." Amazing creatures as we are, we regularly spend hours and hours thinking about conversations, arguments, presentations, and situations in our head. At the end of it all, we're entirely exhausted, and the real work hasn't even begun! If you're stuck on a conversation with yourself, write it down. You'll remove the worry of trying to remember what you're going to tell your boss when you give your notice, or how to phrase that difficult question to your son. Your mind will be free to move on to other, more important and enjoyable tasks. 3. Learning experiences The most challenging output that you get from this stress factory comes from the wing titled, "What I did wrong." Life is one learning experience after another, cunningly disguised as something we like to call "failure." In the age of better-faster-stronger-first, we're not encouraged to make mistakes. The winning ticket goes to those who can do it right the first time, straight out of the chute. Just because this mindset is popular doesn't make it right, and when we don't get the results we expected, we're overly harsh about it. Just like a conversation, work out your situation on paper. What happened? How did it happen? What did you learn? What questions will you ask next time? What do you need to complete the experience? End your journaling with a short note to yourself, congratulating yourself on being smart enough to allow yourself to learn something new. This is the essence of self-growth, which all strong and intelligent people must accept and embrace. We know how self-defeating our negative thoughts can be, but who would have thought that most of these thoughts could be tamed so easily? Practice these techniques often, and enjoy the lifestyle that comes with having less stress and anxiety. All it takes is paper and a pen!
: There is good stress, and there is bad stress. Good stress is the type that propels a person to excel, to reach new heights or to complete a big project on time. And there is bad stress. Stress that comes from conflict or worries. Stress that keeps a person from sleeping and happiness. Stress that calls for relief. Here are three stress-relief tips you can follow. Meditation for stress relief. Can there be a more obvious stress relief strategy than to bring your entire physical being to a calm? Meditation techniques often involve visualization of something calm, like a blank screen or clouds. Or it can mean clearing your mind entirely. If stress is caused by how we allow our minds to captured by worries and fears, then replacing those worries and fears with calmer images is the obvious way to reduce stress. You can sign up for a free course on meditation techniques to reduce stress at my website. Exercise to reduce stress. If relaxing to a state where even your blood vessels are almost still is the ultimate in stress relief, surely exercise, which gets even your blood pumping at breakneck speed, must be the ultimate stress demon. Not so. Exercise is a big stress reliever. In fact, the bigger the muscles you exercise, the more less stress you will bear. That's because exercise releases physical tension in the muscles. Here's another tip: exercise in water to reduce stress even more. Why? Because you are more buoyant on water; gravity takes a much gentler toll on your body, so the tension created in your muscles just by holding you up gets released. For the ultimate stress release, exercise in water. Or meditate in water. Or laugh in water. Laughter reduces stress, too. Yes, laughter also relieves stress. The muscles we use to laugh are those tense ones in our faces. When we loosen them, we release tension from our faces. We also allow more blood to flow to the pleasure centers of the brain (which might be why someone with a 'good sense of humor' is considered more attractive). I think I will close with this excerpt from my newsletter, A Daily Dose of Happiness, which shows the value of a little creative humor: "Little Lady was guarding the space between the trees, as I tried to kick her little ball past her. "Then an idea struck me. Off to the side lay a large, purple fit ball that the kids like to be bounced on. A rushed over, rolled it into the clearing and kicked it toward Little Lady. 'Giant Blueberry Soccer!' I shouted. She laughed. "For the next ten or fifteen minutes, we rolled and licked and laughed and shouted, "Giant Blueberry Soccer!" "What a great family moment, stress relief, joy-injector, fun and more. My formula was simple, and you can do it too. Look around and find something that just would not belong, like a too-big ball. Then imagine what it might be, like a blueberry. Then thrust it into your situation with all the gusto you can apply. "Have fun."
Are any of these scenes familiar? ...The kids woke up late again this morning. By the time you get them to school and fight rush hour traffic, you'll be 20 minutes late for the meeting you're supposed to lead... ...When you were first hired, you felt lucky to get your customer service job. But now you wonder if it's worth it. The phones ring constantly and you hear nothing but complaints. Last week, you called in sick just to get a break... ...It's almost time for your presentation. Top management is here and your supervisor is counting on you to make her look good. You were up all night finishing the Powerpoint. You wonder if you've anticipated all the possible questions... Stress is a permanent feature of our lives, but it really seems to ramp up at work. More than two-thirds of American workers report that workplace stress is a problem. This means we're all spending way too much time in “fight or flight” mode. And it's taking a toll on our bodies through weakened immune systems, high blood pressure, and heart disease. These conditions shorten our lives and lower the quality of what's left. There are lots of strategies for managing stress, but when stress blindsides us with no time to prepare, we don't need strategy. We need quick, practical steps we can take NOW that work fast and can be done anywhere. When stress launches it's next surprise attack, try one of these: breathe deeply, visualize mentally, relax progressively. Breathe Deeply Breathing deeply could be the single most effective way to stay calm. Everyone breathes, but a lot of us breathe the wrong way--shallow, fast, and high in the chest. This kind of breathing is restrictive, it increases our anxious feelings, and it fuels our body's negative stress reactions. Slow, deep breathing triggers a relaxation response, calming the body and focusing the mind. It increases the amount of oxygen in our blood, raising our performance potential. Are you breathing the right way? To find out, try this: put one hand on your chest and the other on your abdomen just below your rib cage. Now breathe. Which hand moves? If it’s the hand on your chest, your breathing is too shallow. The trick is to make the hand on your abdomen move. Inhale deeply while you slowly count to five. Try to get your abdomen to expand instead of your chest. If you have trouble making it happen, try it lying on your back. With a little practice and patience, you'll be able to shift into a deep breathing pattern automatically. Once you learn the technique of deep breathing, you can do it anytime—in the middle of rush hour traffic, right before you handle the next irate customer, even in the middle of your big presentation. Visualize Mentally There are two kinds of visualization techniques. The first one involves building a mental image of a place that's relaxing for you. It may be a remembered place that triggers relaxed, contented feelings, or it may be imaginary. The basic idea is to give your mind something to focus on besides the stress. Once you have visualized your restful scene, you should spend about 10 minutes attempting to imagine it as fully as possible. Inventory your senses. What do you see? How does it smell? Do you hear anything? What do you feel? What can you taste? Then slowly allow yourself to return to the real world around you. Effective visualization will take some practice. Professional musicians and Olympic athletes practice a different form of visualization: a mental rehearsal of what's about to happen. Instead of visualizing a relaxing scene, mentally rehearse the situation that's causing your stress. Visualize the meeting you're about to walk into and rehearse what happens. Imagine yourself successfully completing tasks that give you trouble. Visualize feeling calm and in control. This type of mental rehearsal can help you actually attain these feelings when the situation becomes reality. Relax Progressively Breathing deeply and visualizing mentally both involve your mind convincing your body to relax. Progressive muscle relaxation works the other way, with your body reporting to your mind that all is well. Progressive relaxation works by tensing and relaxing muscles throughout your body, one group at a time. Try this: starting at your feet and working your way up to your head, contract and loosen each muscle group one after the other. Become aware of each muscle, tense it, hold the tension for a count of five, then slowly relax it. As the muscles in your body relax, your mind will become calmer and more focused. The more you practice, the more sensitive your muscles will become to levels of tension and relaxation. The goal is to reach the point where you can relax your body on demand without having to go through the entire cycle. If you can do that, then stress doesn't stand a chance. Be aware of the situations that cause you negative stress. If you can see them coming sooner, it may give you extra time to breathe deeply, visualize mentally, and relax progressively. Not only will these fast and easy techniques help you in the moment of stress, using them regularly may help lessen the long term effects of stress on your life and health.
: Of all the ways to relieve stress, meditation may be one of the best, but what if you don't have the time? What if you are having trouble with your meditation? Try one of the following three good techniques. They don't even require any practice. Breath To Relieve Stress If you don't feel like meditating or just don't have the time, you can at least stop for one minute to just breath. Just breath deeply through your nose and let the tension drain from your muscles as much as possible. Give special attention to the tightness in your face and shoulders. Deep breathing, even for a minute, can relax you significantly. Resolve Your Stressors As I was sitting here getting ready to write this, something was bothering me. On reflection, I realized I've been putting off making a phone call. I needed to tell a acquaintance that I couldn't testify in court as I said I would. She was disappointed, but as soon as I made the call I felt more relaxed. Simply making decisions and taking action can be one of the most immediate ways to relieve stress. Take a moment whenever you feel stressed, identify the things in your mind that are contributing to your state, and then do something about them. That's all there is to this simple technique. Almost. Naturally, you can't resolve everything that is bothering you at any given moment. Still, what you can do is take some action. Indecisiveness, waiting, wondering and worrying cause stress. Even if you just make a list of what you need to do, your mind will often let these things go. Start a list, talk to someone, make a decision - just do something to let the stressor go. Do Things You Enjoy On Friday nights, when I play chess at the coffee house, I don't think about anything else for four hours. When you are totally engaged in an activity, there isn't room for stressful thoughts. Fully engaged, though, usually means that it's something we enjoy doing. While physical activity has some advantages, you can try doing anything that you can put your whole mind into. That could be reading a good book, cooking, or playing with the dog. Notice which activities really engage you and let you drop your worries, and keep that mental list handy for whenever you are stressed. When your passionate activity is also your job or business, this can be one of the best ways to relieve stress.
Money or the lack of it, can cause many people a great deal of stress. People often play mind games with themselves by worrying about certain situations. How will I be able to pay if my car breaks down? How will I cope if I lose my job? In this article, I give money management advice to help people to de-stress about their financial position and future. Worrying about money is especially true for people who are self-employed. They worry about what might happen if business becomes slow and fear that they will not be able to their mortgage etc. Most businesses go through peaks and troughs and it is of course during the lean times when people start to stress. Even though the peaks are possibly just around the corner it becomes very hard to positive. In this situation I would advise people who are self-employed to build up a financial safety net. This money can be saved when they are having a good period and can then be spent when things are not going so well. How will I pay for the mortgage if business falls? Answer, by the money you have saved up, so calm down, you will be fine. The periods when business is slow can be used to re-charge the batteries and can also be used to think up fresh ideas, of the direction you want the business to go in. For all people it is important to know how much money is likely to be coming in per month and how much money is likely to be going out. In business this is not all that easy to do, however in family life it should not be too difficult to predict. If the amount that is seemingly going out is more than what is likely to be coming in, we then need to look at what we are spending. This next idea might seem a little sad but can actually be quite fun. I would advise people to keep a record during one month, of everything they spend. It is not as hard as it may sound and will give you an insight on how much money you actually waste. For example, how many people are members of a gym, but never actually go there? How much money do you spend on take-away food per month? Do you always need to use the car, is it not possible to walk a little more often, therefore saving on petrol costs? How much money do you spend on cigarettes? Do you really need the latest flat screen television? During the good times we can afford to waste money, however if you are worrying about money, it is time to tighten your belt. I myself try to save a certain amount of money per month and invest it in a unit trust. Over time the fund value builds up and if I ever need a lump sum for example, car repairs, I just cash in some of the units. I also allow myself to take out a certain amount of money at the start of each year. This helps me to pay for my car insurance, road tax and to book a family holiday. This has been working well for me for the last five years and is something I plan to continue. It is always worth planning for the future in this way, not just to cover you if your car breaks down but also for many other reasons. You may want to build up a little nest egg to: pay for your daughters potential wedding buy the car of your dreams have the holiday of a lifetime buy a house re-locate abroad buy a business for your retirement help fund your childrens university fees I am now aware of how much money I am likely to spend per month. I like to have treats and waste money as much as the next man. I am more than happy when money is tight to give up these treats and see it as a battle of wills. I hope you have found this article interesting and of use.