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    Eye opening facts about stress

     

    You look at the clock. It's 1 a. m. You've been trying to sleep since 11, and you're still awake. Your mind races. Your muscles are tense. You think you'll never get any rest. Sound familiar? If so, you are one of 60 million people in the U. S. who suffer from some form of insomnia. A recent survey by the National Sleep Foundation indicates that 58 percent of adults in America experience insomnia at least a few nights a week. Insomnia increases with age, afflicting approximately 30 percent of men and 40 percent of women. While insomnia has many causes, many of us can't sleep because we are simply too stressed out. Stress, a major contributor to all sorts of health issues - from weight gain to heart problems - seems unavoidable in today's fast-paced world. We may not be able to eliminate all stress from our lives, but we can minimize it. Here are some strategies: * Make a list. Organize your next day's activities into three categories: "To Call," "To Buy, "To Do." Attach a specific time to each activity, and rest assured that you won't wake up to chaos. * Unwind. Before you go to bed, take a timeout. Read or listen to music as you drink a cup of herbal tea or warm milk. Create a barrier of calm between your jam-packed day and your bedtime. * Relax your body. We carry stress in our muscles, especially those of the neck and lower back. Stretching exercises can ease the tension. When you get into bed, lie flat your back for a few minutes. Tense and relax each muscle group as you work your way up from your toes to your temples. * Try a sleep aid. Non-habit-forming aids are easy to find. The spray Insomnia, for example, is a natural alternative to prescriptions. Part of the Spray line of sublingual sprays, Insomnia helps you relax to ease you into a deep sleep. Made with natural ingredients, the spray acts gently and causes no side effects, according to its manufacturer.

         
    Fear of flying aviophobia

     

    Psychiatry identifies three different categories of phobia: Agoraphobia is a fear of open spaces. It is also a fear of having a panic attack in a public place, of losing control in an area from which escape may prove difficult or embarrassing. Social Phobia is an irrational anxiety brought forth by exposure to certain social situations, leading to avoidance behaviour. Specific Phobia is a persistent and irrational fear in response to some specific stimulus, which commonly results in avoidance of/withdrawal from that stimulus. It could be triggered by an insect or animal (zoophobia), by a situation like being trapped in an enclosed space (claustrophobia) or it could be a fear of disease (pathophobia). The fear of flying is believed to be widespread, possibly affecting as many as 1 in 5 people to some extent. Many sufferers have never flown before. Others used to fly confidently until they unwittingly developed fear. It can even happen to professionally trained pilots. Fear of flying is a learned response. The only fear a baby is born with is a fear of loud noises. At some point you developed the fear, perhaps after seeing footage of an air disaster on the television. Maybe you experienced turbulence during a flight, or your plane was in a holding position, circling an airport for an interminably long time, waiting for permission to land and you began to wonder how much fuel was left. There are many who do fly in spite of their fears. They imagine feeling scared ahead of time. They may have sleepless nights thinking about an impending flight sometimes months away. In the air, symptoms of high anxiety may be experienced such as palpitations, dizziness, nausea, sweating, tightness of chest or hyperventilation. Fear of the fear is common being scared because you are imagining being scared. In the hopes of controlling their fears some will use alcohol or sedatives. It is much healthier to eat well before a flight, have some good reading material or other distractions like music and avoid alcohol, caffeine and sugar. Breathing exercises might also be useful.

         
    Fear of success

     

    It is well documented that many people fail to achieve their goals in life due to the phenomenon known as "fear of failure" but are you aware that a major factor that is often overlooked, is a state known as "fear of success"? Fear of failure will lead many people into inertia - the inability to make decision or take action in case they receive rejection or negative outcomes. This mental state is fairky easy to identify and there are many tools in the personal development industry to help combat this plague and reprogram the mind for success. However, the fear of success is much more subtle, harder to spot and also harder to eradicate. Perhaps you have this tendency in your life. Here are some indications of a fear of success mentality. Studying and trying to implement self-improvement techniques and/or personal development tools but your life does not improve or may even get worse. You settle for less than you feel you deserve or are capable of achieving. You start new projects full of enthusiasm and optimism but wane in your efforts or stop short before you have completed them. You expect things to go wrong no matter how well the situation appears to be at the moment. Can you identify your own patterns in the any of the above statements? The fear of success can also make you behave in ways that hold you back. Look at the list below. These are ethe symptoms of the fear of success. Procrastination - putting off what needs to be done or not doing what you know will bring you closer to your desired result. Everyone suffers from this inner 'demon' at some point in their lives (although some of us suffer from it more than others!). Procrastination is a 'success killer'! How can ou expect to reach your destinationm if you do not take steps towards it? Strive to do little things each day that will bring you small steps closer to your goal. This is why having a personal development plan is an essential ingredient in the fight against procrastination. Take action! Any action! Refine your steps as you go along but do not sit and do nothing. Taking action is one of the key aspects in personal development. Can't see the forest for the trees! - this is almost the opposite of procrastination but has the same effect on your personal development. The aforementioned saying is well known but have you ever given it real consideration? Don't get caught up in your plan believing that it is more important than the materialised goal! For many years I got caught in this trap. I started to think and act as though my plan was more important than my end result and thus missed many opportunities to alter my path and reach my goals more quickly! Let go of your ego and allow the Universe to show you a quicker route to your goal. Remain flexible. Thinking that the time is not right - have you ever waited until the timing was perfect before starting a venture? Have you ever waited until you had more information on a better plan? Again ACTION is the key to the door to success. Taking small steps forward are better than taking none or waiting to see if your foot is landing on the right spot! Even if your actions take you away from your goal you have at least gained insight and knowledge about what does not work! Being a perfectionist - this is similar to the point above and has the same effect, namely, that you never really move forward. No matter how good a job is when its finished it can always be improved! I have heard many great musicians tell how they hate listening to their own songs because they can find a million things that need improved. Yet, we still enjoy them. I think a classic example of this is "Bridge Over Troubled Water" by Paul Simon. This song is hauntingly beautiful yet Mr. Simon does not think its good enough! Seeing only problems - how do you use your focus? Do you constantly see only and alll the problems involved? If you are this way inclined it is pointless trying to change overnight! However, you can use this mindset to your advantage while you strive in your personal development to acquire an opportunistic frame of mind instead. "How can you use seeing only problems to my advantage?" you say. "Easily", is my reply! Look at the problems and prepare a plan to deal with them. Everytime you overcome one congratulate yourself. Use them as a gauge for your achievements. If you keep seeing more problems remind yourself of how well you dealt with the others. Look at how far you have come! If you see a problem ask yourself, "how best can I overcome this challenge?" or "how quickly can I rectify this situation?". The quality of your questions are important as I have outlined in a previous article. Use the problems as fact finders. Is there a real problem now? If so then deal with it. Is it a potential problem? If so then create a contingency plan in case it does occur but don't get caught up in it just be prepared. Enjoy the journey, follow the above guidelines and you will achieve success. Eventually your fear of success will dissipate and you will have moved a long way forward in your personal development.

         
    Finally beat stress and anxiety using these 4 techniques

     

    Copyright 2006 Jeff Smith Have you ever met anyone who didn't feel they had stress in their lives? I can't say that I have every come across anyone who said to me "I have no stress in my life, feel at peace all the time" In fact, most of the people I come across are paralyzed by stress and anxiety - without even knowing it, they have let stress slowly build in their lives, little by little, without even realizing that it was impacting their relationships, happiness, career, health and entire lifestyle. Let me ask you these important questions: 1. Have you felt trapped - like a caged monkey who can't seem to break free no matter how hard you try? 2. Have you all but given in to the pressures of life and find yorself often drifting through days, months even years without really accomplishing anything substantial? 3. Do you have more unhappy moments than you remember in the past? 4. Do you find that even when you do get a spare moment, that you can't seem to really enjoy the things you used to? Chances are negative stress has eaten away at your life, here's 4 ways to reduce the stress you feel now... 1. Recognize and realize that stress is a response you have to things that occur in your life. This may seem less than powerful, but in fact, if you convince yourself that you control your response to stress, you gain hope and belief that you can really make changes to lower your stress response in your life. 2. Take time for you. Many people take from us, our employers, friends, children, even the media and society at large. Its tempting to just give in and give up the piece of your day that must belong to you. By giving up your private relaxation, personal thinking or meditation time you are NOT benefiting those around you, in the long-run you are giving up control, allowing more stress into your life which will result in you being LESS effective to those around you. 3. Exercise. Its not necessary to instantly become an exercise fanatic. Too many of us think in terms of all or nothing. Start by committing to a morning, lunch hour or evening walk 3 times a week for at least 40-minutes. If you prefer a gym, then start slow and build up an exercise regime. Not only will this benefit you in terms of personal image, weight loss, energy gain, but it has been scientifically proven that exercise produces chemicals in your brain that help you overcome stress. 4. Become more self-aware. Its often the case that when we feel most stressed, we also feel that we have lost who we really are. In fact, losing a sense of what is really important to us is one of the biggest factors preventing people from pulling out of feelings of stress and hopelessness. Yoga and meditation are incredibly powerful techniques that are both simple to learn (at least the basics), and can lead to incredible changes from the inside out to alter the stress balance in our lives. Yoga and meditation will take some up-front committment, but within a few weeks of consistently practicing these principles, you can experience some very dramatic changes in your ability to handle stress. With the majority of our population being paralyzed by the inabiltiy to control stress leading to anxiety, it is perhaps one of the most desctructive forces threatening today's society. At an individual level, you have the ability to change your level of stress dramatically, but that change must come from within and it must start with your own belief that indeed, you can control your response to stress. Following the four principles outlined above will certainly allow you to quickly overcome the limitations of stress and anxiety in your life.

         
    Five things you can do to help deal with the stress of long haul trips

     

    : Long Haul Trips on aircraft, trains or buses can really challenge a person's ability to cope and deal with travel stress. Have you noticed the number of irate people who travel these days? There are five things you can try to help you cope with traveling on long haul trips so that you are not another statistic of being an irate passenger. #1. Do Not Drink Alcohol The number one cause for people getting stressed during long haul trips is alcohol, in particular with air travel. Look I like a good drink like the next person, but alcohol has a tendency to change a perfectly sane and calm person into a raving lunatic. Just look at the number of airline shows that you see on television with people behaving badly. If you are taking a long haul trip on an aircraft, I recommend that you limit your alcohol as when flying at height the affects of alcohol are in fact multiplied. Personally, I discourage all of my staff from drinking whilst flying to avoid travel rage. #2. Make Sure That You Drink Lots Of Water Have you ever had a headache come on? Often this can be because you have not drunk enough water especially when you are working in air-conditioning. Just because you are working or traveling in air-conditioning you can still dehydrate which can cause aches and pains and in particular headaches. By ensuring that you drink lots of water during your trip, it will ensure the aches and pains will not exacerbate your travel stress. When going on long haul flights I always ensure that I carry a 1 litre bottle of water and a small 300 ml bottle of water with me, so that I can stay hydrated especially if the airline charges for water like some of the discount ones. I carry the 300 ml bottle of water so that you can fill your 1 litre bottle in the bathroom because quite often it will not fit under the tap in the sink in the toilet. #3. Make Sure You Walk Around the Cabin Once An Hour Nobody likes to be cooped up especially in a confined space and your body does not like it. There are studies throughout the globe, showing that people who sit in the one position on a long haul flight may have the risk of contracting Deep Vein Thrombosis. Having seen my grandmother go through this disease because she did not do the right thing whilst traveling on a train for 24 hours, I strongly encourage everyone to make sure that each hour you get up and walk the cabin. Walking does two things, one it allows you to stretch your legs and get the blood flowing through your veins and secondly the exercise helps you to produce alpha waves or calmness waves in your head which will in turn help you to beat the travel blues. #4. Listen To Relaxation Music Listening to music is a fantastic way to reduce stress and with IPODs and cheap CD players it has never been easier. However, a word of warning, you need to choose music that is not going to stimulate stress. Some music is not really suitable for stressful situations as it can in fact amplify the feeling of stress. One type of music, which research has shown to help reduce stress is Baroque music. This music is written so that there are only 60 beats per minute and funnily enough that is what our heart rate should be. The baroque music has been found to increase the alpha waves in the left and right sides of your brain and this helps improve learning ability, creativity and calmness. #5. Meditate Okay, I can hear it now, "Oh Yeah Hippy, Want Us to Meditate do ya?" Absolutely! Look whilst meditation has certainly been a thing of fringe groups in western society or associated with eastern religions many researchers are now coming to the distinct conclusion that meditation can make a huge difference to our day-to-day lives and help us to overcome stress, especially while traveling. Look, why not try out meditation for just 20 minutes a day. It is a fantastic tool and when you become proficient in the art you will find that moving to a start of calm is really easy. There are many different techniques to help you meditate and I certainly recommend meditating using Baroque music as we have found that it helps the person meditating get to that point of peace a lot quicker than other types of meditation music. The bottom line is this. I have traveled many hundreds of thousands of kilometers across the globe and many people ask me why I travel so well and the simple secret to it is, I follow the five things I outlined before. Apart from that, when dealing with airline staff, if you are not absolutely calm and extremely polite and gracious they could send your baggage to Timbuktu and make you wait a day or two in the airport lounge before they will help you get to where you want to go. Maintaining your composure whilst traveling will also help your health and help you to enjoy your trip. I love traveling because I get to see the world and see the wonderful things it has to offer. Why be stressed when you are there? To finish off this article let me reiterate the five things you can try to reduce your stress when traveling on long haul flights: #1. Do Not Drink Alcohol #2. Make Sure That You Drink Lots Of Water #3. Make Sure You Walk Around the Cabin Once An Hour #4. Listen To Relaxation Music #5. Meditate

         
    Forgiving yourself and others

     

    At some point in our lives, all of us have been wronged by another person and felt hurt, angry or resentful. This is a natural reaction and part of being human. However, if we do not resolve or come to terms with these hurts, they drive our actions and create a negative way of life. By harboring past hurts, we have the potential to do far more harm to ourselves than anyone else can possibly do. “All illness is caused by not forgiving.” – Native American belief Forgiving others – or yourself – does not mean forgetting or condoning what happened, or giving up the values that were violated or assuming you are at fault; nor is it condemning the other person or seeking justice or compensation. Forgiveness can be viewed as foregoing the resentment or revenge when the wrongdoer’s action deserves it and giving the gifts of mercy, generosity and love when the wrongdoer does not seem to deserve them. To release the shackles of the past, we must be willing to forgive. Forgiveness is about creating a state “for giving” – both to self and others – and excusing a mistake or an offense and letting go of the associated hurt, anger or resentment. Because forgiveness has the greatest benefit to the person doing the forgiving, it is one of the greatest gifts that you can give to yourself. Forgiving allows us to get on with our lives and to open up our minds and hearts to new ways of seeing others, the world and ourselves. It releases energy that can be used for other, more productive thoughts and actions.

         
    Four steps to combat college stress

     

    You're back to school and trying to balance exams, papers and projects. Meanwhile, the cafeteria food has you homesick for some good cooking, and your roommate's pile of clothes is oozing into your side of the room. If college stress is more than you can handle, take these tips offered by CyberWize, maker of Vital StressX, a supplement designed to help the body cope with stress: * Get organized. When your work space and schedule are organized, the rest of your life becomes better organized. Take time to sort your papers into files by subject, putting your books on a bookshelf and clearing your desktop every day. Next, get an organizer or PDA and start putting due dates and social activities on the calendar. * Discuss any problems with your professors or an adviser. Take advantage of the knowledge your adviser has in helping you manage your schedule and combat any problems you are having with certain subjects. * Maintain a balanced lifestyle. It's important to eat, sleep, and exercise regularly. Eat breakfast, lunch and dinner, and carry light snacks with you to maintain your energy throughout the day. Aim for eight hours of sleep each night, and exercise for 30 minutes at least three times a week. * Supplement your routine. Studies have shown some all-natural supplements, such as Vital StressX, can be beneficial in the fight against stress. Vital StressX contains a combination of seven herbs, known as adaptogens, that have been shown in clinical trials to control the production of excess amounts of cortisol. These adaptogens were discovered by Soviet scientists nearly half a century ago and are believed to help your body adapt to stressful conditions, boost energy and endurance, and help sharpen your memory and alertness. "Vital StressX facilitates focus and concentration, reducing stress and promoting success," said Dr. Robert D'Amico, a specialist in osteopathic medicine in Tarpon Springs, Fla.

         
    From anger to peace of mind

     

    Anger is a serious problem for one in every five Americans. Road rage, workplace violence, domestic abuse and even addiction are just a few of its many expressions. The reason such a large umber of our nation’s citizens are on antidepressants, overweight, and involved in all kinds of difficult relationships can be directly traced to the effects of anger, particularly the hidden kind. Anger has many faces. It appears in various forms and creates different consequences. Anger that is overt is the simplest to deal with and understand. When we or someone we know is openly angry, we know what we are up against and can address it directly. Unfortunately, however, most anger lurks beneath the surface. It often does not come to our awareness and manifests in endless, hidden ways – as depression, anxiety, apathy, hopelessness, and in myriad other forms. Today we fear all kinds of external enemies. It is not so easy to realize, however, that the worse enemy we face is the anger that resides within us, the terror it causes and the ways this poison affects so much of our lives. It is one thing to be told to forgive one another. It is another to know how to do this. Even though we may want to forgive, anger can be ruthless in the course it takes, attacking and disrupting our body, mind and spirits. However, there are many specific steps we can take to root this toxin out of our lives. As we do the results will be reflected not only in our mental and emotional well-being, but also in our environment and physical health. When anger is rooted out, love and forgiveness arise naturally and our lives and relationships become all they are meant to be. Some of The 24 Forms of Anger – The first step in rooting anger out of our lives is becoming aware of it. It is crucial that we recognize anger for what it is, be aware that it is appearing and notice the devastation it creates. When anger is allowed to remain camouflaged it holds us in its grip and easily erodes the quality of our entire lives. By recognizing the 24 forms of anger, we will be able to shine a flashlight on the poison within. Then we can choose to eliminate each one of these forms of anger, one a day. There are many wonderful antidotes that we can take. Instead of allowing anger to take hold, we simply replace it with a life giving, constructive, healing response. To begin we will look at a few of the 24 forms of anger, and how it affects your life. More will be explored in further articles and are also detailed in The Anger Diet. In this article we will also explore some ways these forms of anger can be eliminated. 1)Straightforward Anger – Attack. This is anger that is clear-cut and easy to recognize. The anger comes right out. Many regret it afterwards, feeling they couldn’t control themselves. This kind of anger has a life of its own; it rises like a flash storm and can easily turn into verbal, emotional or physical abuse. 2)Hypocrisy – You are angry, but hide it beneath a smile and present a false persona, pretending to be someone you’re not. This behavior evolves into bad faith of all kinds. Although you think you are fooling others, in truth you are losing yourself and your own self-respect. 3)Depression – Depression is so pervasive these days, and it ranges the gamut from mild to severe. Depression is anger and rage turned against oneself It comes from not being able to identify or appropriately express the anger one is feeling. It then simply turns into depressions, attack against the person who is experiencing it. 4)Passive Aggression – This is a form of anger expressed not by what we do but by what we do not do. We refuse to give the other person what they ask for, want or need. In this manner we anger the other while making it seem as though they are the one that is overly demanding. This is a way of expressing anger without taking responsibility for it, and blaming the other for what we have set in motion. Steps To Dissolving Anger Needless to say there are many specific steps to take to undo different forms of anger. We will offer some samples. The important point to realize is that anger can be dissolved in a moment. We can choose to see things differently. We can choose to make a different response. It takes only a moment to escalate a situation and in that same moment, the trouble can be de-escalated. We must stop in the middle of automatic anger that arises, and take charge of what is going on. We can and must decide that we will not let anger take over and rule. We have the right and responsibility to choose how we will respond. Sample Ways To De-Escalate Anger: 1)Straightforward Attack: Stop in the middle of a situation in which you either feel angry or are being attacked. Expand your vistas. Rather than respond in a knee-jerk manner, say to yourself, “Like me, this person has suffered. Like me, this person wants to be happy, like me this person experiences loneliness and loss.” As you do this, you are recognizing the similarities and common humanity you share, rather than focus on the differences. For a moment, allow the person to be right. You have plenty of time to be right later. Ask yourself, what is more important to you, to be “right” or to be free of anger? Choose compassion and see how you feel. See how the other feels as well. Watch new vistas open in your life. 2)Hypocrisy: This is a common form of anger that appears in many different ways. When you notice yourself pretending, lying, exaggerating or deceiving, stop. Tell the truth at that moment. Be the truth. If you do not know what the truth is, be silent and become aware of what the deepest truth is for you. (This does not mean pouring out negativity or blaming the other. It means taking responsibility for what is real and true for you. (This will not only restore good will, it will connect you with what is most meaningful in your life.) 3)Depression: Make friends with yourself today. When we are depressed, we are rejecting, hating and blaming ourselves. Undo this false state of mind. Find five things you admire and respect about who you are. Focus on sharing your good qualities with another. In depression we are only absorbed with ourselves. A wonderful antidote is to become absorbed with how you can reach out to and help another. As we root anger out of our lives, and find meaningful substitutions not only our lives but the lives of our loved ones, friends and acquaintances will be lifted and enhanced. Try the full anger diet and see. Cc/author/2005 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

         
    Geopathic stress

     

    Perhaps one for the biggest hidden dangers today is Geopathic Stress. You can't see it, taste it, smell it, feel it or hear it; yet it surrounds us all. Geopathic stress itself comes in two primary types, natural and unnatural. It is basically the energetic fields that are emanated from various sources. Natural forms of EMF include lay lines, underwater sources, energy vortex's and negative Feng Shui lines. These have always been around us and recognized by many cultures, in particular the chinese and the celts. Dowsing has been the most common way to identify these energy fields and has been used around the world in various forms for many centuries. There have been many studies carried out linking these natural geopathic stress fields to illness, and in particular cancer. People who developed cancer had their home checked and it was discovered that dowsers could pick up negative energy fields in areas they spent large amounts of time, often through the bed. Research was then conducted on who had previously lived there and it was found that there was a very high incidence of previous occupants dying from cancer. It's not just cancer but a whole range of illnesses and problems that have been linked to geopathic stress. These include ME, depression, insomnia, headaches, back pain, and stress. However the past hundred years we have seen a rise in the geopathic stress due to the large amounts of electrical equipment now used. It is estimated that the ambient EMF pollution has increased over 200 million times in the past century. This level increases to over 1 billion times in city centre's. An experiment with bumble bees showed them going crazy and attacking each other when exposed to high EMF fields, a rather scary similarity to our own culture in many ways. I ask men 'would they put their testicles in a microwave?', and the answer is of course no. I then ask if they carry a cell phone in their trouser pocket, to which the answer is usually yes. What is the difference? Well essentially the time it takes them to cook. This is a little too close to the truth for comfort. Cell phones emit frequencies in the micro wave range, so do microwaves, hence their name. Now agreed a microwave has a lot higher radiation level but thermal image scans on the brain have showed that it too heats up when using a mobile phone. In fact 2 minutes needs one hour for the effects to fully reduce. Think about that. It means that many people are literally 'hot headed' the whole day! Now I know cell phones get a lot of bad press, and perhaps a little unfairly when you consider how bad cordless phones are, and worse still hairdryers. The fact of the matter is every electrical device gives off something. So take an average office worker. First they make their toast, in a toaster. Not too bad if they are not standing too close. Then they drive to work, in a car. Cars generate huge levels of EMF's due to the metals in the tyres, moving engine parts, air conditioning, radios etc. This is the all contained in a metal cage insulated from the ground allowing it to build up. It's no wonder so many people become stressed and fatigued driving. Then they arrive at work, sit in front of a computer, emitting radiation, under fluorescent lights, emitting radiation, take a cell phone call, emitting radiation and on and on. They finally drive home, in their car, and then sit in front of their TV, emitting radiation, eating their radiated food from their microwave. And that's only a brief look. You can use EFT and other Energy Psychology methods to clear some of the disruptions to your system caused by EMFs. Headaches from fluorescent lighting is a great example. This though, in my opinion, needs to be done on a frequent basis as your system keeps becoming re-disrupted. It is also impossible to be aware of everything affecting you all the time. We need a more practical, long term solution. I don't want to paint a picture of doom and gloom and get you even more depressed, however a little awareness could go a long way. It is obviously impractical to give up this way of life for most people, so what to do? Protection is the key. Minimize exposure where possible, i. e. use a normal wired in phone when possible, walk don't drive when possible etc. For the rest of life I cannot recommend BioPro highly enough. There are now many EMF neutralizers out there but none as well tested as BioPro. Mobile phone shields do not work, they cannot work or neither would the phone. However the fields can be harmonized so they no longer affect the body. On their website BioPro have thermal scan evidence of mobile phone heating the brain, then not heating the brain with the use of a BioPro harmonizing chip. There is plenty of more evidence and research on the site too for a range of products. Don't delay, act today. EMF's are not going to fix themselves. I usually hate multilevel marketing because you feel the person selling to you has such a vested interest. However I hope as you will appreciate from my site my main focus is to educate people about what they can do for themselves. These products last for life and so may well be the best investment for yourself and loved ones in the modern age, allowing you and your family to enjoy modern technology without the dangers.

         
    Getting control of your anger

     

    : One of the major roadblocks to strong relationships, both at home and at work, is the inability to effectively manage one’s emotions. Of all the emotional, psychological and physical responses we experience in life, anger is perhaps the most challenging to process and control on a consistent basis. How you choose to respond to your anger will make a difference in the quality of your relationships, your physical and emotional well being and your effectiveness in bringing about positive and constructive change in your life. Here is a list of practical tips you can use to help manage your anger more effectively. 1. Understand What Anger Is Anger is a natural, God-designed emotional and physiological response to negative or threatening circumstances in life. When you believe that you have been treated unfairly or harshly, or when you experience frustration associated with an unmet need or goal, your mind and body prepare for action. It is this emotional and physiological response that we call anger. Anger has the potential to help us protect ourselves or others and can serve as a catalyst to bring about needed change. However, its relative value is largely determined by how we choose to respond to it. Anger is referred to as a “secondary emotion”. This simply means that it is an extension of the primary emotion of frustration. Everyone experiences some degree of frustration on a daily basis whether associated with not being able to fit into your favorite blue jeans or the person who just pulled out in front of you on the road. The good news is that most people can keep their frustration from escalating into anger, but for some it’s not so easy.

    Hurt and fear are two other primary emotions that often accompany anger. Anger is often experienced and intensified when these other emotions are minimized or ignored. Consequently, effective anger management involves learning how to identify and express hurt and fear in a healthy fashion.

    [Keep in mind that the goal is not necessarily to eliminate anger, but rather to process and express it constructively.] 2. Control Your Initial Response The emotional and physical response triggered by a real or perceived offense or threat typically gives way to feelings of anger that can range from mild agitation to violent rage. The greater the sense of hurt, fear and frustration, the greater the intensity of your anger. It is always important to remember that your initial or "automatic" response to anger may not be the most constructive. You need to pay attention to your words and actions so that they don’t become a damaging expression of your pain. Postponing your angry reaction by as little as ten to twenty seconds can mean the difference between a good and bad outcome. During this time you will want to take several deep breaths and consciously tell yourself to “slow down” and to “respond” instead of “react”. A response is characterized by thinking before you act, considering how your action will impact others, and imagining a positive outcome. A reaction is “knee jerk” in nature and evidenced by thoughtless action with little concern for the outcome except to relieve the tension brought on by the anger. It’s important to note that recent research challenges the once widely held belief in the value of letting one's anger out through the release of physical energy, e. g., hitting a pillow or pushing a tree. It is now believed that this form of "catharsis" can actually reinforce the expression of hostility and aggression, which may increase the likelihood of a similar and even more intense reaction in the future.

    3. Acknowledge Your Anger and Its Source Go ahead and say it: "I am very angry for being falsely accused, for being criticized, for being treated poorly or unfairly, for experiencing fear or hurt, etc.” Admitting to yourself, and, at times, to those around you, that you are feeling angry is one of the keys to managing your emotion. Simply saying out loud that you are angry can help decrease the intensity of your feelings. When we fail to acknowledge our anger we run the risk of holding it in until it overflows or begins to destroy us physically, spiritually and emotionally. Keep in mind that feelings that are buried alive do not die! 4. Tell Yourself the Truth Here are some objective facts to remember when feeling angry: "I have been seriously and unjustly treated or hurt. To feel angry about that is normal, but to control my response is in my best interest." "To respond to my anger irrationally or aggressively will not serve any positive purpose and could actually create greater pain and problems for myself and others." “When I choose to ignore or stuff my anger now I run the risk of acting it out later which will likely hurt myself and others in the process.” “I am only responsible for how I express my anger, not for how someone may choose to react to it.” Practicing rational self-talk is critically important to managing anger well. Following an angry reaction, make an effort to identify and examine the self-talk you engaged in while acting out your angermon irrational and destructive beliefs may include: “No one is going to treat me that way and get away with it.” “The only way to really get someone to change or to understand what you want is by getting really angry at them.” “People will think they can take advantage of me if I don’t express my anger toward them.” “If I don’t get angry they will think I’m weak or try to control me.” 5. Limit Your Exposure to the Things That Trigger Your Anger Repeated exposure to stressful images, thoughts and situations can intensify your emotional response. If you find that your anger escalates when you watch the news, read the newspaper or talk about an offense or injustice with a friend or co-worker, then you may need to significantly reduce or eliminate these activities. The same holds true if you are exposed to someone who intentionally, or unintentionally – we’ll give them the benefit of the doubt for now - provokes you by being critical, blaming or mean. The best thing you can do is respectfully excuse yourself from the situation and only reengage when cooler heads prevail – especially yours. Finding alternative activities to engage in when frustrated or angry like exercising, calling a friend, reading a book, playing with your children, working around the house, or watching a funny movie can give you the break you need to avoid an emotional reaction and regain a healthy perspective. 6. Take Constructive Action Effective anger management often includes engaging in constructive and creative forms of expression. Here are some examples of how you may want to respond to your anger.

    • Identify the specifics of what you are angry about in order to prevent your anger from being displaced onto other issues and/or people.
    • Regularly practice relaxation techniques.
    • Refrain from reliving the experience and intensifying the emotion.
    • Don’t exaggerate the incident, stay rational.
    • Express the emotions that often accompany anger, i. e., hurt, fear, sadness.
    • Explore options related to problem solving. If your anger is related to an ongoing frustration or irritation take time to consider possible solutions to resolving the problem.
    • Rehearse your response and focus on staying in control, speaking calmly and maintaining a slower pace of speech.
    • Think before you speak and listen carefully.
    • Use humor to diffuse your anger.
    • Make sure that the timing is right for expressing your thoughts and feelings about an issue.
    • Talk openly and honestly with friends, family and co-workers and make sure that the important ingredients of constructive dialogue are included.
    One way to enhance your communication with others when it involves difficult issues or painful emotions is to use a communication template. The one outlined below involves the use of five simple sentences that will help you stay focused. ”When you…” - Make sure you stay objective at this point only stating the facts of the situation not your interpretation of them. ”I feel…” - Keep in mind that you must identify “feelings” at this point not simply more thoughts disguised by the words “I feel”. Pay special attention to the temptation to use the phrase, “I feel that…” – you can’t feel that. ”And then I…” - Here is your opportunity to describe your thoughts and actions associated with the situation. This will give others a window of understanding into how their actions impact you and why. ”What I need is…” - Don’t be shy about sharing your needs, wants and desires.

    People tend to complain about what they don’t want, but stop short of clearly identifying what they do want. Expressing your needs in this way can open up a dialogue about expectations that can either lead to agreement or the need for modification. ”What I’m willing to do is…” - This statement will give you the opportunity to communicate to the other person that moving forward in the relationship is not all about what they can do or change, but rather that it involves responsibility on your part as well.

    Example: “When you arrive home an hour later than you say you will I feel fearful, angry and disappointed. And then I think you don’t care about me or our family and that you are inconsiderate. What I need is for you to come home closer to the time you say you will or for you to let me know that your plans have changed and why. What I’m willing to do is to be more understanding of your situation at work and to be more supportive of those times when things don’t work out like you thought they would.” At first you will likely feel awkward and clumsy when using this form of dialogue, but in time it will become a natural way for you to communicate and an important part of your overall emotional management strategy. 7. Forgive the Offender If the offense you have suffered is personal, unfair and deeply painful it is in your best interest to ultimately forgive the offender. Unfortunately, forgiveness is usually not what you want to think about when you have been mistreated and deeply hurt. Instead, you are likely to be more focused on some form of retaliation. Unforgiveness often leads to bitterness and resentment, which means you will personally suffer more than you need to. It has been said that holding on to bitterness is analogous to you drinking poison expecting the other person to die. A decision to not forgive your offender actually gives them power to continue hurting you long after the offense has been committed. Forgiveness is not easy, but it’s very necessary for your own well being. A great book on the topic of forgiveness is “Forgive and Forget” by Lewis Smedes. It not only helps the reader understand the importance and value of forgiveness, but it provides assistance in walking you through the process. Anger is not always easy to control, however, if you are willing to be honest with yourself and intentional about engaging in the process of change, you can be successful!

         
    Getting help for your fears and post traumatic stress disorder

     

    It is not easy to deal with your fears, post-traumatic stress, or anxiety problems. The first step is that you should talk to a professional who can get you started in the right path of getting better. Getting help from a counselor or other professional is very important and can provide you much help and insights in dealing with your current problem. In addition, here are some techniques a person can use to help manage their fears and anxieties. Learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. Focus on the present and stop trying to predict what may happen next week. Next week will take care of itself. A good way to manage your fear is to challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or anxious, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. Sometimes, we may be nervous doing a certain task that may be scary. When this happens, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship hockey game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that your playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Self Visualization is a great way to reduce the fear and stress of a coming situation. Remember that there is one power that is stronger than your fears and that is the power of God. A person does not have to be religious to use the power of God. When the going gets tough, talk to God about your problems as if you were talking to a friend. Review the Bible and pray hard. Be persistent and be open in the avenues that God may provide to you in solving your problem. It is not always easy, however God is in control and he will help you if you ask him. As a Layman, I realize it is not easy to deal with all of our fears, however there are all kinds of help available. The key is to be patient and not to give up. In time, you will be able to find those resources that will help you with your problems.

         
    Getting rid of anxiety living in the present

     

    I used to be a person who worried about imaginary events in the future, and I let my imagination play havoc with me. My worries and my anxiety would not let me focus on whatever I was doing. Furthermore, I was aware that I was being controlled by my worries and that upset me even more - I would put myself down and say to myself, "What sort of person am I that I'm letting myself be controlled by my imagination?" Fortunately, I came across some readings that allowed me to see the light. I learnt a few techniques that put me in control of myself straight away. I observed that getting rid of anxiety and worries was not such a difficult task after all. I am sharing today this powerful technique with you. It is the "This Is Me Doing This" positive technique: getting back to the present (and only the present). A distracted mind is a field where concerns and worries grow easily. Paying attention to what you are doing is key to live a happy and fulfilling life. Having a positive attitude naturally follows. Decide to get back to the present. For example, if you are washing dishes, start by saying to yourself "this is me washing dishes". Repeat it calmly, focusing on the very act of washing dishes. Name that which you are doing. As you repeat to yourself "this is me doing (whatever)", you start feeling relaxed. Other matters loose importance; you're giving orders to your mind to actively focus on what you are doing, and only that. When you move on to the next task, keep on telling yourself what you are doing. "This is me walking upstairs", "this is me feeding the cat", etc. Feel how more and more calm comes to you as you keep on repeating "this is me doing (whatever)". After a few minutes of keeping focused and repeating to yourself what you are doing, you will probably experience a feeling of well-being. All stresses and worries may seem past or worthless. Keep focused. Talk to yourself positively in between telling yourself what you are doing. Say "this is me brushing my teeth" (for instance), followed by "I am calm and I am enjoying the present", "this is me brushing my teeth", "I feel good and relaxed". The benefits of this technique are powerful and almost immediate. It allows you to focus on this present rather than letting your mind play with hypothetical events. It shuts all unnecessary worries and anxieties. When practised regularly, this technique gives you the chance of being more aware of who you are, where you are, and what you are doing. The very first step to choose the life you want! the-benefits-of-positive-thinking

         
    Getting through the day when your anxieties are out of control

     

    What do you do when your fears and anxieties overwhelms you as soon as you get up in the mornings? Well the first thing you need to do is to seek the services of a professional and/or counselor who can teach you how to manage your fears and give you the help that you need. Until you can meet with someone, what can you do in the meantime to cope with your fears? The first step is to take a deep breathe and try to find something to do to get your mind off of the problem. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper, watch TV, play on the computer or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. This will distract you from your current problem. Most importantly, doing something will give you the self confidence that you can still function and that you can get through the rest of the day. Another thing to remind yourself is that things change and events do not stay the same. For instance, you may feel overwhelmed in the mornings with your anxiety and feel that this is how you will feel the rest of the day. This isn’t correct. No one can predict the future with 100 Percent accuracy. Even if the thing that you feared does happen there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage. You never know when the help and answers you are looking for will come to you. I was told by a counselor that your anxiety and worry decrease over time. Your anxieties may seem intense at the moment, but that won’t be like that forever. Your worry will eventually decrease. I asked a professional why does the worry and anxiety decrease over time and she told me, “Because it just does”. In every anxiety related situation you experience, begin to learn what works, what doesn’t work, and what you need to improve on in managing your fears and anxieties. For instance, you have a lot of anxiety and you decide to play on the computer to help you feel better. The next time you feel anxious you can remind yourself that you got through it the last time by playing on the computer. This will give you the confidence to manage your anxiety at the present time. Don’t forget to Pray and ask God for help. A person can only do so much. Asking God for help can give us additional resources to help manage our fears and anxieties. It is not always easy, however God is in control and he will help you if you ask him. As a Layman, I realize it is not easy to deal with all of our fears. When your fears and anxieties have the best of you, seek help from a professional. The key is to be patient, take it slow, and not to give up. In time, you will be able to find those resources that will help you with your problems.

         
    Go where your energy is strong

     

    : "Keep your center and you’ll know which way you have to go." – Terry Dobson, aikidoist and author, Aikido In Everyday Life I had undertaken a project that I was beginning to feel was beyond my personal resources to accomplish. I had asked a friend and colleague if I might organize a workshop in the New England area that he would teach. After many months of collecting information, I was at the point of choosing and committing to a conference center. Next would come the advertising, invitations, mailings, registrations, etc. It happened many years ago in the early stages of my new career, and I was beginning to feel that I was in over my head. I began to wish I had never started the project but was afraid to say anything, because I didn’t want to let my friend down. This change of heart was difficult to acknowledge. I couldn’t heed the internal signals that were telling me to stop because of the louder voice cautioning that I had started something that I needed to finish. Others were depending on me. Listening to the small “Stop” voice was dangerous, because I might disappoint people. It was easier to plow ahead, even if it meant discounting my intuition. Still, that persistent little voice kept nagging . . . I decided to call my friend and talk about it, not exactly knowing my goal for the conversation but trusting my intuition. Seeking approval is deeply rooted in me, and at the time it's pretty much all I cared about. But I'm glad I had the courage to call, because I received a great gift that continues to support me whenever I’m faced with alternative paths. The Gift My friend answered the phone, we exchanged pleasantries, and I began. He listened. I think he understood immediately what was happening, and after a pause from me said just a few words: "Judy, go where your energy is strong." Yes. It made sense. And it was really simple. Where was my energy strong? Not for this project at this time. It was taking my focus away from what I really wanted to do – design and implement my own workshops. That's where my energy was strong. That's what I wanted to be doing, planning and thinking about. All at once everything fell into place. It felt exactly like it does on the mat, practicing aikido – a martial art that has become a metaphor for me in difficult situations. If you try to force the technique, it's all strain and stress and struggle, and you could end up getting hurt or hurting your partner. But when you move from center and follow your ki (life energy), the endeavor is effortless. As I followed my ki, I knew I would stop the process I had begun, and that it was the right thing to do. Forcing the issue would have strained my resources and, eventually perhaps, the relationship. My friend understood before I did that the timing wasn’t right. I learned an important lesson that day from a gentle teacher. I try to remember to live by it – and it still takes practice. Those who know me know that I call myself an "approval-seeking missile"– not that it's necessarily a bad thing to want another’s good opinion. But now I'm able to notice if it is my dominant motivation and to let my center guide me. Sometimes I go ahead with the project anyway. I like to be liked after all. And sometimes I stop and take a look at my motives. Often there is a way to acknowledge and satisfy both my need for appreciation and the call to be true to my inner wisdom. I have learned to listen to myself. Why am I struggling? Where is my energy strong? These are living questions. When you feel yourself resisting something, let these questions be your guide. You’ll learn you have more power than you think. PRACTICE: * Is there an "either or" decision you’re struggling with? Notice if your head is telling you to go in one direction, while your heart is pulling in another. * The process of centering integrates head and heart, intellect and emotions, mind, body, and spirit. * Sit quietly and think about what’s important. You may find that you have two or more values that are competing with each other. * Write down your thoughts, feelings and reactions. * If possible, let the question be in your consciousness for a whilee back to it periodically in different ways. * Where is your energy strong? In time you’ll know the answer.

         
    Good stress and bad stress

     

    The stress response of the body is somewhat like an airplane readying for take-off. Virtually all systems (eg, the heart and blood vessels, the immune system, the lungs, the digestive system, the sensory organs, and brain) are modified to meet the perceived danger. Trembling Pounding Heart With trembling and a pounding heart, we can find it difficult to execute precise, controlled skills. And the intensity of our focus on survival interferes with our ability to make fine judgments based on drawing information from many sources. We find ourselves more accident-prone and less able to make good decisions. Become aware of your stressors and your emotional and physical reactions. Notice your distress. Don't ignore it. Don't gloss over your problems. Determine what events distress you. What are you telling yourself about meaning of these events? Determine how your body responds to the stress. Do you become nervous or physically upset? If so, in what specific ways? Preventing Stress Reduce the intensity of your emotional reactions to stress. The stress reaction is triggered by your perception of danger... physical danger and/or emotional danger. Are you viewing your stressors in exaggerated terms and/or taking a difficult situation and making it a disaster? Are you expecting to please everyone? Are you overreacting and viewing things as absolutely critical and urgent? Do you feel you must always prevail in every situation? Work at adopting more moderate views; try to see the stress as something you can cope with rather than something that overpowers you. Try to temper your excess emotions. Put the situation in perspective. Do not labor on the negative aspects and the "what if's." Good Stress and Bad Stress The stress response (also called the fight or flight response) is critical during emergency situations, such as when a driver has to slam on the brakes to avoid an accident. It can also be activated in a milder form at a time when the pressure's on but there's no actual danger - like stepping up to take the foul shot that could win the game, getting ready to go to a big dance, or sitting down for a final exam. A little of this stress can help keep you on your toes, ready to rise to a challenge. And the nervous system quickly returns to its normal state, standing by to respond again when needed. Relieve Stress with Stress Ball If you are working in an office environment, be sure to get yourself a stress ball. Stress balls are proven to relive a person from stress! So what are you waiting for? Get a stress ball today and learn how it can benefit you.

         
     
         
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