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    Tend to your own happiness

     

    Many of us wish for more happiness. We want to lead happier, more fulfilling, lives, but the sad truth is that so many of us that wish for more happiness spend much more time tending the happiness of others than we do tending to our own happiness. Happiness does not simply happen. A person does not suddenly stumble across happiness. Happiness is the result of careful tending and a person who wishes to be happy must tend to their own happiness. Tending to your happiness does not need to be difficult, complex, or time-consuming. It can be as simple as this four-step formula: 1. Trash your unhappy thoughts and trends 2. Envision yourself happy 3. Needs fulfilled 4. Desires fulfilled Making yourself a happier person really can be that simple. Step one is an important one because unhappiness is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Many people are unhappy because they don't believe they deserve to be happy and they lock themselves into patterns of behavior that make them unhappy. You must trash your unhappy thoughts and trends. Look inside yourself and find out what (and when) you think about things that make you unhappy. Is there a specific time of day that you tend to be more unhappy? Is there a specific task or routine that seems to feed your unhappiness? Is there something that you do or think that contributes to your own unhappiness? Once you identify the areas of your life that cause you unhappiness you can find ways to confront it and combat it. Sometimes you can make a change to avoid the trouble spot altogether, but when that's not possible find ways to make it less difficult on yourself. Adjust your schedule or your expectations if that will make things better. Recruit help when you can. Just easing off one task or freeing up a few hours can make a huge difference in your attitude. When all else fails and you can't change or share something unpleasant than don't hesitate to give yourself a reward for accomplishing it. Knowing you will be rewarded can sometimes make difficult tasks more palatable. Step two is key. Some people have been unhappy for so long they have forgotten what happiness looks like and feels like. Envisioning yourself happy can help create the happiness habit. Thinking about your own happiness will also help counterbalance times when you are unhappy or working through unpleasant tasks. Think about difficult times as simply stepping stones to happy times. Step three cannot be overlooked. If your basic needs for food and sleep are not met then you will not be able to focus on happiness. Obviously it is not impossible for hungry, sleep-deprived people to be happy, but most humans are a lot less likely to be happy in that state. Food and sleep provide fuel for both body and mind and the healthier your body and mind then the better chance you have to achieve happiness. Step four is the final step to achieving happiness. What do you desire? What do you wish for? What do you dream about? Allow yourself to dream big but don't overlook small wishes and desires. While a two-week cruise might be great just having a weekend at a local resort might really give the rest, relaxation and escape you might need. Or perhaps you'd really like to lose 30 or 50 pounds but finding a way to work in some exercise a few times a week might give you more immediate gratification while eventually accomplishing your long-term goal. Make a list of your desires, wishes, and dreams -- big and small -- and keep that list some place handy. What can you do this week to achieve a small goal? What can you do this month to take a step toward a big goal? Sometimes you don't even need to accomplish your goals to achieve happiness. Sometimes it is simply enough to know that you are working toward your dreams. Often happiness is found on the path to our dreams. Often happiness is created while we strive to make our wishes come true. You can make yourself a happier person but you must tend to your happiness. So often we spend more time tending to our outer possessions than we do tending to our inner ones. You can make a few changes to your life to find a better balance and that will help create more personal happiness for you.

         
    Test your emotions and outside stimuli

     

    How much are your emotions affected by outside stimuli? This will be a difficult question to answer for anyone - Are You Happy? If yes, how much? Are you happy under all circumstances? At all the times? Are you happy even if you meet an old enemy? Are you happy when you have no money? Are you happy filing your Tax returns? Are you happy when you find your favorite candidate losing? No. We are happy or unhappy depending on what is happening to us and around us. happiness is only one of the emotional state. all our emotions get affected greatly by what inputs we get from outside. We have no control over our emotions most of the times. What is happiness? Happiness can be defined as a feeling of satisfaction, feeling good and feeling joy. Why we become happy within event and unhappy at the other? A good news makes us happy and a sad news robs us of our happiness immediately. We fluctuate between the feelings of happiness and unhappiness throughout the day. Are we so controlled by outside events that our mood gets affected easily? Can we not ignore whatever is happening and be happy always. Can we not look at everything with equanimity and say - I will be happy always. If we can do that, it will be really good for us. We will not be at the mercy of stimuli from outside to make us unhappy . It is not only stimuli from outside, but also from inside. Any bad memory can turn our mood upside down. We are in control of our own emotions. Happiness is a boon. Things will always be going wrong. Memories will always come. But if we decide to keep ourselves happy, we can surely progress slowly to a state where unhappiness can not touch us easily. Happiness is only one emotion. We are affected by different emotions - Anger, Love, Hatred, compassion and so on. What applies to happiness also applies to all other emotions. Emotions batter us at all the times. We are like a ship freely getting beaten by the roaring ocean of emotions at all the times. That is not good, because we are not in control. Try some fun quizzes to find out how much you get affected by stimuli and what is your control over your emotions.

         
    The attitude of gratitude

     

    Yes, it might feel great to win the lottery. Money, houses, travel - these are wonderful, but not enough by themselves. You need the right frame of mind to fully enjoy life. You need the attitude of gratitude. Be Grateful Life is better when you feel blessed, when you can look around and say "Thank you, God." Religious or not, when you see life as a wonderful gift, your experience is a richer one than any amount of money can provide. Imagine going through life like you're a child, and every morning is Christmas. It's tempting to think gratitude comes from having what you want. You see yourself giving thanks if you had money, a loving family, and maybe a house on the beach. Still, you know there are ungrateful, unhappy people with these things, and poor people full of gratitude for what little they have. Where does this feeling come from? Creating Gratitude Gratitude arises from how you look at things. It is the natural feeling that comes from truly appreciating the people and things in your life. It is also something you can learn. First, you have to stop and smell the roses. You can't be thankful for something you don't notice or enjoy. Roses really do smell great, by the way. Then, you need to make this appreciative approach to roses and life a habit. There's no need to ignore the ugliness in the world, but you have to habitually see the beautiful things. Start writing down every positive thing that happens to you, and all the things you like. Do this until you start automatically seeing the good things in life. If you've ever bought a white car, and started seeing white cars all over, you know how awareness can alter your perception of reality. To see wonderful things all over, train yourself to look for them. When you are in the habit of "counting your blessings," gratitude, and a much richer experience of life is the natural result.

         
    The colors of flowers

     

    Human beings first used natural colors centuries ago. During those times synthetic colors were not available. Flowers were the main source of color. This article does not intend to go into how the colors were extracted and so on, but how colors of flowers can make our life a better living experience. Let us examine. Look at flowers. You will find a range of colors - from purest white to black. Some flowers are single colored while many have colors so beautifully mixed that no painter can do something similar. The first observation we can make is - all colors look good on flowers. We may hate a color, for example you may dislike yellow. But if you pick up a yellow colored flower, you may not dislike it. Why? Because the color merges so well with the structure and texture of the flower that it does not remain separate but merges totally in the flower. I hope I am making myself clear. What I mean to say that even if you hold a yellow colored flower, you will not be noticing only the color, but the touch, the shape, the fragrance and the symmetry of the flower. Color has merged itself with other qualities to create something beautiful. Is this making sense? I have been talking about the colors. But I could have been as well talking about any other quality of the flower. My contention is simple. If a quality does not overpower other qualities but merges with them the result can be great. We as human beings can do the same - as the members of a family, a team or a part of business group or as citizens of our nation. Instead of overpowering others with our qualities, if we try to merge and create a whole, the outcome will always be much better. The focus is to dissolve one's individual ego and work together in tandem.

         
    The culture of excess

     

    We live in a society of gadgets and gizmos, of toys and more toys, of things that evoke feelings of luxury, style and class. This is available to almost everyone, not just a privileged few. This is the 21st century. No other time of the year is it more prevalent, conspicuous and aggressively promoted than during the Christmas season. Thanks to advances in technology, the airwaves, the print and electronic media are flooded with advertisements that appeal to society in general, to people from all walks of life. Open any newspaper or magazine and indulge yourself with endless advertisement, appealing, titillating and surely tempting. You can’t miss it, it’s almost in every page and glares you in the face. Turn on the computer and you can access more goods and services at the click of a mouse. Add to this endless ads and banners. The young generation is brought up in this era of consumerism. They are introduced to a high maintenance lifestyle at a very young age. Gone are the days when shopping for children was fun. A time when it did not take much to make their young hearts happy. Life was simpler. Times have surely changed. The trappings of good life is no longer the sole domain of the wealthyfort, travel, wheels, homes, luxury, name it, it is within the reach of anyone who is willing to pay the price. It is no longer just a dream. This is just the beginning of the conspicuous consumption of our society. In the name of convenience, there are more and more gadgets for the home introduced faster than one can pay off existing debt. However, this is not a deterrent. It is no longer a matter of meeting a need, the “want” list gets longer and longer. Each member of a family has their own want list. Technology is wonderful; it allows man to take great strides, faster and more accurate than our forbears. Technology makes it possible for man to explore space, the depths of the ocean, the untrodden parts of this earth. Through technology, man has made incredible advances in science, communication and the medical field. Technology is if great benefit to mankind. It is very much a part of our daily lives. There is a downside - man wants more of the convenience that comes with it. It fuels the imagination of both producers and consumers. It stimulates the need to want more. It encourages the desire to pamper oneself, and loved ones with more goods. Having more than what they need promotes a sense of living the good life. For every season, for every occasion, the market offers boundless ideas and endless flow of material goods. Beware, quality is slipping down too fast, as production and advertisement are cranked up higher, some of the quality is compromised. The convenience that technology offers is hard to ignore. How did we manage before, when most of the chores were done manually? Imagine the time spent to get anything done? Take a look around the house, push a button to get laundry or the dishes done. Press another button to start the car before you open the door. Set a timer for your coffeemaker, for your lights to come on at a desired time, your radio to wake you up. Wouldn’t you be lost without that remote control? What about the other gadgets and tools for the handyman? Look at the other things around the house to make living more convenient and definitely add to that feeling of comfort and luxury. There’s moremunication is revolutionized. Each member of the family has to be wired. Watch the ads, imagine the convenience of having extra gadgets for each family member just for so much a month. Add to this the paraphernalia that goes with it, some of which are good to have but not a necessity. But does it matter? It becomes a must have. The quest for material goods is at excessive proportions. It hits the very core of a person. Some can only measure success relative to their material possessions. Some identify their self-worth with material acquisitions. The words status and prestige are medals they wear proudly. Rightly so, if it makes them happy. How much of these goods are on credit? How many sleepless nights are spent doing endless calculations and adjustments? Is there room for a quiet time that comes at no cost? Or do they experience that feeling of emptiness amid a comfortable surroundings? Does this culture of excess spell happiness and peace?

         
    The dance of life

     

    Waking up as a little boy the excitement for the day's adventure pumped through my veins and lit up my eyes. I'd look out the window at the bright sunshine, the hay fields, and the expansive blue skies and magical clouds. Once out in the freedom of the day, with no responsibilities, I'd hop, skip, jump, and run with joy, wonder, and excitement. Somewhere along the way, I began to remember and learned about cause and effect. Suddenly some limitations came into existence. Continuing to grow and mature, I learned to reason and apply my own critical thinking to situations that may or may not happen. I was creating a new reality within the context of my mind and my past experiences. The horror! Now, with another level of awareness that has developed, the spiritual awareness, it's like walking the tight rope between this world we live and work in, and the uninhibited freedom of a child at play. There is something more to this experience of life. We are not just conditioned beasts of labour and love. We are not just confined to living a life sentence in suburbia. There is, and always was, so much more available to us. It exists everywhere, including suburbia, at work, in the mundane, at the most extraordinary and ordinary. The only way I can explain the discovery is to dance. One day hopeful, the other day destitute, one day in love, the next day hateful, one moment playful, the next moment serious, and one day success, the next day failure. We're constantly moving and changing. The only constant is the silence, the stillness, the quiet place deep inside where spirit connects spirit. We feel it in the closest moments of intimacy with family or significant others. It is experienced in the greatest profound moment of joy and all words, all senses, all comprehension has escaped us. There is nothing left to figure out, there is only to forget. Everyday we would do well to forget many of the happenings of our yesterday. No bias, no fear, no limitations, no expectations, just wonder. Wonder and curiosity accompanied by joy and love. This intrigues me greatly. How would tomorrow look? How would my world interact? This ideal leads me to believe that more is available for all of us. As an idealist, many things I say may seem unattainable. This is the peak possibility, of that there is no doubt. While the ideal is beautiful, any measure or occurrence of that ideal is welcome. A grain of salt to flavor each day for a fantastic experience of life. Each day, I need to be that grain of salt too, and dance!

         
    The easiest way to achieve happiness

     

    People always think that what they want is money, relationship, material possessions, but what they truly want is happiness. Wealth, health and relationship are just the rewards of being happy. Happiness is a state of vibration that is in harmony with the universe. As you have already known, the same frequency vibrations tend to attract each other, so the vibration of happiness is going to attract more wealth, better relationship and better health, since these things is going to add more happiness to your life, and they are in the same vibration. If you go after money, you may not get it, if you go after happiness, money will flow to you. The same apply to relationship and health. I believe the ultimate goal in life is to achieve a state of well being, or we can simply say happiness. Is there an easier way to achieve happiness? The answer is Yes! and I am now going to show you how. I had learned one phrase from Dr Wayne Dyer, and I would never forget. The phrase is " How may I serve?". Dr dyer said that before his seminars, he will always sit for mediation, and repeat the phrase as a mantra "How may I serve... How may I serve?". He never bring any notes with him, and when he speaks, the words just keep flowing to him. He knows exactly what to say, and what to teach. Dr Wayne Dyer is one of my best role model. He has achieved great success in almost every ear of his life. I believe the one single most important element to Dr Wayne Dyer's success is this mantra "How may I serve?" Ask yourself now "How may I serve?". This is the key to ultimate happiness and fulfillment in life. I would like to share some of my own experience. The most enjoyable things in my life at this stage is writing articles that can makes a difference in the quality of people's life. Whenever I finish writing an article, I feel the positive energy all over my body. I sometime get puzzled myself, where does this information come from? How do I write so many articles, having thousands of people read my articles every week? I finally realized the secret is within this phrase "How may I serve?". Every time when I write a article for my newsletter, I sit in front of my computer, and ask myself "How may I serve, How may I serve?". Strangely, the ideas will come, and I put my fingers on the keyboards, then words just starts following. I didn't understand how this process works, until one day I realized that the information does not come from me, it comes from God (or the Higher Intelligence), I am only an channel for the information to flow. I am a channel that God has created to serve the world. Because that is what I am here for, so when I am serving, I feel positive energy, and I feel happy. I have learned that my life purpose is to serve, and I think this is applicable to everyone. This is what God wants me to learn, this is also what God wants you to learn. You will only truly feel fulfilled once you realize this truth. "Your life purpose is to serve" I am sure you have heard of that "If you seek happiness for yourself, it will always elude you, if you seek happiness for others, you will find it for yourself." I know this is why every time I finish an article, I feel so happy, because I know that my article is going to benefits thousands of people, and It is going to change the world to some extend. Maybe 90% of people will not take any action after they read my article, this is nature of human being., but I know as long as they read, their awareness is expanded, and they will see the difference in the long run. For that less than 10% of people who do take actions, I know my words are going to change their lives for the better. What a great thing I am doing! I am proud of it. I am feeling so happy about it. So start from today, find ways to help other people . Find some way to serve. You will get addicted to it, because it is so enjoyable to help. Your help is going to change people's lives. I often receive emails from my subscribers asking me for help. You can imagine how happy I am after I answer their questions? I know that this person's life is going to change for the better just because of my words. How wonderful that is! Here is an secret I want you to know... The person who benefits the most is not the one you give service to, but yourself. You may find it sounds strange, but this is true, and it is governed by the universal law of cause and effect. Anything you cause others to experience will come back to you, and multiplied. If you cause others to experience love, you will find more love in your life; If you cause others to have wealth, you will have more in your own life; if you cause others to succeed, you are guaranteed to succeed. This is the law of the universe, and it never fails. So, whatever you want to experience in your life, cause others to experience first. This is the most powerful ways to attain your own desires, and the easiest way to achieve happiness

         
    The essence of happiness

     

    I will never forget the dedication in the book of one of the most reputable experts on the subject of motivation, the American Dr. David J. Schwartz, The Magic of Thinking Big. When his six-year old son completed kindergarten, Dr. Schwartz asked him what he would like to be when he grew up. Without hesitation, the child replied, “Dad, I want to be a professor.” “A professor? A professor of what?”, Dr. Schwartz asked. “Well, Dad,” his son replied, “I think I want to be a professor of happiness.” “A professor of happiness! That’s a pretty wonderful ambition, don’t you think? To them - David, a fine boy with a grand goal, and to his mother, this book is dedicated.” If we were to ask what light is, we would get the most accurate description from a person who had lost the ability to see, and if we were to ask what freedom is, we would certainly get the best explanation from a person who had lost it. However, I do not believe it necessary to ask anyone what happiness is. Most people think that happiness is a result of personal qualities and circumstances which cannot be measured. For others, the goal of happiness is “all or nothing.” One of the best tennis players in the world, Arancha Sanchez-Vicario, gave the following answer to the question “What is a nice day for you?” “A day that I feel happy.” There is no direct road to happiness, except through our own adaptation and adjustment. But what does that mean? It means that we should not live our lives waiting to become happy, but rather continuously and persistently dedicating ourselves to learning to experience personal happiness. Sometimes people are blind to the happiness around them, and the more opportunities for happiness they get, the unhappier they feel. For truly happy people, time ceases to exist; they seldom peek at their wristwatches. There are no unsolvable problems for the truly happy. They constantly smile and simply live their lives. So what can we do to adapt to this new way of living? We shouldn’t always wonder and ask what we need to do in order to achieve absolute happiness. Sometimes, quite often in fact, we must know what not to do - what we must avoid and distance ourselves from - so that we can become happier. An obstacle for our happiness could be fear of acting wrongly or incorrectly. This is a problem we experience from very early childhood to our golden years. The problem exists because we are used to other people telling us what is proper and improper - what is right and wrong. If we decide to form and develop our happiness ourselves, it is up to us to balance the guiding influence of moral and social conventions with the fundamental freedom of moral self-determination. Regardless of how they connect with our careers, our education, business, family, health, wealth, perfection, glory and power our dreams and desires have their own paths. Once we are able to truly believe that we will find and follow this path, we will certainly become happier. Such faith gives us enormous power, divine guidance and inner strength to walk our path with confidence and accept our challenges with grace. Therefore, we have to learn to strive toward giving our best effort every day, to carefully measure all our thoughts, words or deeds, and to try to realize whether they make us happy or unhappy. The ultimate goal is achieving absolute happiness. Millions of people look for it, but only handfuls create it themselves.

         
    The good life

     

    I was listening to the MSNBC on the radio the other day when a feature came on entitled, ‘The Good Life’. They proceeded to discuss a $14,000 dessert being offered in Sri Lanka that included, amongst other things, an aquamarine. No kidding. This is how MSNBC characterizes the good life. It struck me how in our culture we define the good life more in terms of the consumption of material goods than in relationship to any other quality. Simply listen to the vast majority of contemporary music on the airwaves these days for confirmation. I have two teenagers in my house so I know all too well: Cristal champagne, expensive cars, first class jet airline seats, bling…the list goes on and on. This is what our kids are being taught: the good life is about having things, not about who you are as a human being. Where are these values coming from? I believe it is a trickle down effect from what they see being honored in our society. So if the good life is about having things, how is it that so many people who have so many things have lives that lack so much satisfaction and meaning? I am not saying that having money is not a good thing, quite the contrary. We all need financial security. We need to know that we can provide for our families and be free of the pressure of struggling to make ends meet. We all want to live a comfortable life. But where is the point of no return? “Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.” Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955), (attributed) The Worldwide Institute in its 2004 State of the World report explains: Societies focused on well being involved more interaction with family, friends, and neighbors, a more direct experience of nature, and more attention to finding fulfillment and creative expression than in accumulating goods. They emphasize lifestyles that avoid abusing your own health, other people, or the natural world. In short, they yield a deeper sense of satisfaction with life than many people report experiencing today. What provides for a satisfying life? In recent years, psychologists studying measures of life satisfaction have largely confirmed the old adage that money can’t buy happiness—at least not for people who are already affluent. The disconnection between money and happiness in wealthy countries is perhaps most clearly illustrated when growth in income in industrial countries is plotted against levels of happiness. In the United States, for example, the average person’s income more than doubled between 1957 and 2002, yet the share of people reporting themselves to be “very happy” over that period remained static. So if growth in income has not made people happier than obviously they are not living the good life. In order to clarify what the good life is, I do an exercise with clients that involves seeing themselves at some distant point in the future where they are finally who they want to be, they have what they want to have and are deeply satisfied and happy. In other words, they have achieved the ‘Good Life’. Nearly one hundred percent of the time, without fail, clients do not have visions of extreme wealth. They really don’t talk about wealth at all, at least not in terms of money or possessions. They do not talk about living in a house with every known convenience and luxury. They do talk about a home located in a beautiful setting, perhaps by the ocean or on a lake in the mountains. There is always talk about a place that gives them a feeling of peace and serenity…a place they were meant to be. They never discuss possessions…ever. No talk of cars, televisions or fancy clothes. It just never comes up. They may mention that they are free to travel but certainly they do not say first class. They describe themselves as a person who no longer fights feelings of depression, dissatisfaction or dissonance in their lives. They speak of a feeling of acceptance of what is. There is love in their lives although they don’t necessarily mention a specific mate. Just love. There is discussion of deep wisdom accumulated over the years. There is also talk of being surrounded by the people who they hold dear. Often, if they have children, they will say that they are happy that they have been able to help their kids but more often is the description of children who have grown into responsible, loving and fulfilled human beings. They describe with pride children who are contributors to the world. I hear about pets in the house and perhaps grandchildren. These are folks who have discovered what truly has meaning for them and what they really value. “Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one's values.” Ayn Rand (1905 - 1982) Values. What are the things to which you attach value? What is important to you? If you had to create a list of the top five things that you value, what would they be? Would it be money, possessions, power, stature and authority? Would it be love, family, integrity, freedom and compassion? Or a combination? “Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.” Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955) We have all heard the adage about what the epitaph on our tombstone will say or not say. Will it say that she had a powerful job, she flew first class, that she had a Mercedes-Benz and wore only couture? More often you will read on a tombstone that she was a loving Mother and Wife, a charitable person and an outstanding member of the community. Think about how you would like to be remembered? What would you like to hear people say about you at your funeral or memorial? Will it be on how much money you made or how much you consumed? Doubtful. I remember the funeral of a very dear friend who died suddenly while he was still in his fifties. The Rabbi said that all we have in the end is our good name. Who we were, how we lived, how we loved, our empathy and compassion, service to the world we lived in and the legacy we left to our children and their children. My own personal take on the good life, at least for me, involves the following: I want to be a person who possesses a deep appreciation for everything that I have: to be grateful. I want to be able to live without the fear of not being able to take care of my kids and myself and yes, I do want to live well. Living well for me is a lovely home in nature; it is being free to travel; it is having the ability to help my kids get a good start in their adult lives; it is having enough money to be able to take good care of myself and to also be charitable. I want to have a life that is filled with meaning, with a deep connection to the world around me. What is your Good Life? Take the time now to give thought to the life that you want to live, the life that you would describe as the Good Life. Make certain that it is aligned with your values and your passions and to so you must connect with your values and passions. What are they? Think long and hard about what brings you real joy and fulfillment. Remember those times in your life when you were the happiest…what resonated for you in those moments? Consider how you want to be remembered, how you want to look in your children’s eyes. What traits do you admire in others and how can you adopt some of those traits? What have been peak experiences in your life and what was it about those experiences that made them so special? These are the kind of questions that beg our attention. These are the questions that will ultimately lead us to the Good Life. Not the $14,000 dessert but a life well lived. With meaning, love, comfort, joy and fulfillment.

         
    The keys to creating more romance in your life are within you

     

    Since most people express the desire to have more romance in their lives, it really begs the question: How do you create a romance that lasts? What’s the secret to energizing your life with a lasting vibrant romantic energy? It’s critical to embrace the concept that we create our own reality. From moment to moment we are literally creating the life we live out of a field of infinite potential. Thoughts, desires, attentions, and intentions are all crucial elements in manifesting the current reality in which we live. Regardless of specific religious or metaphysical belief, it is universally agreed that beneath the physical beingness there is a spiritual beingness as well, and that the nature of this spirit is infinite. And since at the true core of our being we are infinite, by definition we possess unlimited creative potential. The keys to unlocking and directing this potential, that is, creating our reality, have to do with the quality our intention and desire, and how and where we focus our attention. What we focus on becomes our reality. This is one of the immutable laws of our universe. Your intentions have great power. They organize the infinite field of potential and bring it into harmony with your desires. Attention, on the other hand, enlivens your reality. If you want more of something, put your attention on it. Intend that it be so. This powerful combination of intention and attention helps mold your living reality from moment to moment. From this perspective, romance can be understood as a condition of loving reality that is created from moment to moment from and within the infinite field of pure potentiality. Often it happens spontaneously between two people. It seldom lasts long, however, and even more seldom forever. It is possible, though, to create a lasting romance; it takes honest desire, loving intention, and constant loving attention. Like any life force, romance needs constant nurturing to grow and stay healthy. So if you desire more romance in your life, start by thinking about the romance you want. Take time each day to envision your life with more romance in it. Try to visualize clearly what your life would be like, and how your conditions would change. Imagine yourself being romantic in vivid detail. Write down on paper your vision and read it daily. Post it somewhere where you can see it often. Also, examine your intention about romance. Are your intentions to create more love in your life, or are they about something else? And most important, are you committed to its creation? Over time are your really willing to do what it takes to manifest it in your life? You can create anything in your life with honest and strong desire, positive and committed intention, and consistent loving attention. These are all keys to creating a lasting romance in your life as well.

         
    The path to happiness

     

    Happiness is something that so many people strive for each day and yet many times it eludes them. Often, they feel that happiness can be theirs if only their situations were different. Have you ever felt like that? So often we get caught up in what I call the “if only’s”. If only my husband were nicer to me. If only I had a better job. If only the children were grown and out of the house. The list can go on and on. We can waste so much of our precious time dreaming of the “if only’s”. So many people fall into this trap and end up miserable most of their lives. The problem is that they are looking for happiness to come to them somehow. As if it were something that could be possessed. When happiness does happen to come it seems so fleeting that it quickly passes away. People erroneously think that happiness is just a feeling like some passing fancy. I am here to tell you that happiness is not a feeling, it can be a way of life. Happiness can be yours on a daily basis if you will only follow some basic principles. First, you must live in the NOW. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not promised to us so you need to be present in the now. Secondly, you must control your thinking and the thoughts that pass through your mind. Happiness can be called a state of mind and the way to happiness is bringing your mind into its proper state. If I live in Texas and I want to be in California I need to change states. In order for me to be in that State I need to make some changes. In this analogy we will decide to take a train. The train must be going in the proper direction and we will arrive at our destination. We must know which train we are on, or we may end up where we don’t want to be. Think of this train as your thoughts. That’s right, your train of thought. If you don’t want to stay in Texas you have to get on the right train. If you let any train of thought into your mind then you will be taken to and fro and never arrive at the destination you want. The question then is how do we get on the right train? The ticket to getting on the right train is called gratitude. Gratitude is an attitude and as we look to all that we have to be thankful for instead of dwelling on what our problems are we will find that we too can be whisked away to the state that we wish to be in. There is a path to happiness and that path is gratitude.

         
    The power of positive thinking

     

    Welcome to the bridge of Manifest life. Don' t let any situation take the control. You are the second master of the game, under the universe master law, what you think is what you get. Can that be possible? Yes it can be, you got to be in a manifesting state, your mind, your body is one, not two. The flow of energy that is rotating in the universe can break you if you are not going in the right direction. You must follow the law of the universe, and be happy. Do not worry about what is happening, but accept it and act toward a positive trend if it can be done, but never stay without acting when the bad situation, the non lucky time frame is falling on you, this is definitivly a law of the universe, and it will happen again and again, you got to do something, but the thing that will put you on the right track... You must understand that; be careful, the universe can' t be redirected, rather you should follow the same direction, and profit from the tremendous flow of vital energy coming from the six directions. Good force are there, but you must know how to avoid the bad forces. Although the positive forces are stronger, it is easy to fall in the wrong wave, and quite difficult to focus and stay on the right way. So how can you be positive all the time, you think: nobody can do that. No, a lot of people do it, what is the difference between them? Two kind of people: The sleeping, and the awake. It is not the real sleep here, you should understand what the sleeper is: in fact, he is awake like everybody, so why is he a sleeper? Just look around you, and try to find out: is that man awake or he is a sleeper? Do that exercise, and you will be astonished with the results, you will be able to feel people, to feel the energy, like you feel the wind touch on your skin... He is a sleeper because he can' t control, he doesn' t see... Everyday, he wakes up like every people in this world(law of the universe, nobody can change it), however, he is not satisfied with his life, it is just a matter of doing things because they got to be done, because everybody is doing that... The sleeper act, eat, do everything without vitality, without energy, without love, without passion, he is a sleeper, his life is empty. Worst he doesn 't know what is life... We will complete the sleeping case, and start with the awake, the enlighten case...

         
    The pursuit of happiness

     

    The pursuit of happiness is one of the primary goals of all humans. This, along with life and liberty, was declared as an essential right in the US declaration of independence. Every religion and philosophy has offered its pathway to happiness. Happiness is a state of mind and there are many paths to it. There are common prerequisites to sustained happiness as well as common causes of unhappiness. These usually transcend all classifications of gender, age or race. There are other factors which are very individual specific. What is Happiness Happiness is a state of the mind. The dictionary definition is ‘feelings of joy and pleasure mingled together”. A feeling of happiness is more than just an experience of joy or pleasure. It is a state of mind where the individual feels that “life is good”. Becoming Happier Happiness is a state of mind which can be induced by many means – some result in short term happiness while others result in long lasting happiness. One way of inducing long lasting happiness and bliss is meditation. For a busy person, a more practical way to becoming happier is to make steady progress towards meaningful goals. Even though this seems simple, it really is a very powerful technique to attain a state of long lasting happiness. The goals may vary from individual to individual, but for everyone happiness comes from merely making steady progress towards goals that are meaningful to them. The key is that goals have to be meaningful to you. Progress towards goals set by some one else will not bring happiness (unless you too desire the same goals). There should be a balance in your goals to ensure that the prerequisites of happiness are fulfilled. These prerequisites include good health, sufficient income to meet basic needs, affection, some productive work or activity, defined and achievable goals and good attitude. All the money in the world will not make you happy if you ignore your health or have bad relationships. Also you must try to remove the causes of unhappiness from your life. These causes are - lack of any of the prerequisites for happiness, failure to achieve goals, envy, relationship problems, loneliness and fear of the opinion of others. Studies have shown that a number of factors contribute to sustained happiness. Some of these are • Good self esteem • Feeling of control over one’s life • Supportive and warm relationships (marriage/friendship ) • Satisfying work • Enjoyable leisure activities • Good attitude • Good Health • Moderation in everything • Impersonal interests Thus a very effective process of becoming happier is to set goals for improvement in each one of these areas, start working towards these goals and then periodically reviewing the progress towards the goals. So the first step is to set goals for yourself in the major aspects of your life. These goals have to be meaningful to you and they have to be specific and time bound. If the goals are not meaningful to you, you will derive little happiness from achieving them. Also if they are not specific and time bound, you will not be able to measure your progress towards these goals and thus will not experience the increased happiness which comes from making steady progress towards your goals. Goals need to be set for the major aspects of your life which contribute to happiness – Health, Financial, Relationships, Career, Attitude, Self Actualization etc. Then you must assess where you currently are in relation to your goals. Say if your financial goal is to have savings of twenty thousand dollars in five years, you need to assess your net worth today and also your current income and expenses to know how much you are currently saving. Next you must set up a time bound action plan to achieve your goals. For your financial goals this means determining the extra amount you need to save each month, either by earning more or spending less or both. Then you need to have a plan for earning more and for reducing your expenses. This plan needs to be specific with amounts and timing e. g. you will reduce expenses by $50 a month by eating out less often and you will increase income by $300 a month by taking on a part time job. Then start implementing your plan and monitor the progress. As you see yourself meeting your periodic targets, you will find your happiness increasing. Many of us have experienced the happiness which comes from steadily losing one pound per week in a weight loss program. Imagine having the same effect in all aspects of your life. The important thing in this is to make steady progress towards your goals. Happiness will grow as you see yourself making progress. Once you achieve your initial goals, you need to set new goals – maybe in different areas of your life e. g. if you have achieved your fitness and financial goals, aim for making a difference to the world around you. (Making a difference is a source of deep and long lasting happiness). Being without a goal after achieving your earlier ones will reduce your happiness. Say you suddenly inherit some money and achieve your financial goals, you will be happy for some time, but the effects will soon wear off as your mind adjusts to the new level of affluence. To sustain happiness you will have to set new goals for yourself, maybe in different areas of your life. If you faithfully follow this process of making steady progress towards meaningful goals, you will become happier day by day. Please visit myhappiness for more information. Copyright © MyHappiness 2005-2006- All Rights Reserved. About the Author: Sanjiv Sahay is the editor of MyHappiness–Making Life Happier myhappiness , a website that helps you to find your own path to sustained happiness by using Happiness Information, Directory of Resources, online tools and the help of an online community of your peers. He can be contacted at [email protected] .

         
    The quest for a happy life

     

    Would you consider yourself to be a happy person? Are you seeking ways which could you to have a happier life? I am a person who basically is after a very simple and happy life. I do not crave fast cars, I do not wish to live in a huge mansion, I do not need to have lavish and expensive holidays abroad each year. In this article, I describe the type of lifestyle that would and does bring joy and happiness to my life. I am a very proud father of two wonderful children. These children have an ability to make me smile when I am at my most depressed. They are very confident and live life to the full. They have an abundance of energy and are basically from what I can tell, having a very enjoyable childhood. I am also engaged to be married and my fiancee is in full time employment. On most mornings, she will leave the house at around seven in the morning to go to work and will return home at around half past four in the afternoon. I am self-employed and this enables me to take my children to school and to also collect them from school. I love to be able to do this and just this morning was a prime example of why I do. My son, who is five years of age, woke up at about half past seven. I was already downstairs feeding our animals. He strolled down and asked if I could make him some breakfast. He did this with a huge smile on his face. He then ate his breakfast whilst watching some of his favourite television programs. A little later, I handed him his clothes and asked him to get dressed. As it is quite a hot day, he wore his shorts and looked so cute later as we walked to school, as he was also wearing his baseball cap. As he lined up outside his classroom, he started to talk to his teacher and to his friends. I thought to myself that most fathers would never have the pleasure of seeing their children in these situations and I felt very happy and contented. Most fathers just like my fiancee, leave the house early and do not arrive home until after school has finished. I am sure a lot of them like it this way, but I want to spend as much time as possible with my own children. I do not earn a massive amount of money as a self-employed person, however am able to earn enough to have what I consider to be a good quality of life. I hope to be able to continue this standard of living by working hard to keep my business alive. My accountant believes I should be working longer hours and that if I did, I could probably double my earnings. This may well be true, but it would no doubt come at a price. In my opinion, money is not the be all and end all. Money is not something that makes me happy, spending the maximum amount of time with my children does. I am not envious of people when they tell me how much they earn, or when they tell me what car they drive, or when they tell me that they have just bought a villa in Tenerife for example. I am very happy as I am and these things are just not important to me. Each to their own of course. I have in the past worked in what most people would call a nine to five environment. At this stage of my life I did not have any children and I was happy to work there. As a self-employed person, I am now able to work at different times of the day and a lot of the work I do, I do in the evenings when my children and fiancee have gone to sleep. I think I am one of the lucky ones and hope that this happiness continues for months to come. I am sure that my children also enjoy the fact that I am able to spend so much quality time with them.

         
    The ride of your life who s driving

     

    One of the biggest challenges that most people face in the exiting times we live in, is the feeling that their lives are just spiralling out of control. They feel like the events and circumstances of their lives have lead them along a torturous route and that they have no control over all the misfortunes and wrong doings that brought them to this moment in time. The truth is that your life will not change until and unless you assume full responsibility for it. Responsibility, or your ability to respond, is not a way of accepting some form of blame as most people think, but rather a way of accepting your ability to respond to any situation. It is absolutely critical to realize and accept that it is never the actual events of your life but only your responses to these events that will shape and create your life. You are never the creature of circumstances and you have the ultimate ability to consciously decide what things mean and how to respond to it. You are the only one that can and the only one that will take you where you want to go in your life. Responsibility is not some skill you need to go and find outside of yourself but it is something you already possess. All you need to do is to assume this power that calls on you to stop blaming any and everything other than yourself. Most of us have been conditioned to blame someone else for the parts of our lives that don't work. When you take full responsibility for your life you put yourself back in charge; you get back in behind the wheel of your life and now you have the ability to control and direct your life the way you choose to. Ultimately it is not the conditions of your life but rather the decisions about what things mean and what you are going to do about it that will create the real conditions of your life. When you are fully responsible you recognize that you are the creator of your life. At some level you were responsible. If not by your conscious actions, then by the meanings and emotions you attached to the events and experiences. Only when you accept responsibility for creating everything in your life can you start to un-create and re-create it the way you truly want. If you keep blaming someone or something else you will remain bound because you will always rely on something or someone else to be responsible for the way you feel and ultimately someone else will be responsible for the state of your life. You have to consciously unfold your arms, get out of the back seat and get back behind the wheel and start directing your life towards where you want it to go, instead of just going with the flow. See, there are only two real choices in life, the one conscious and the other unconscious: you can either choose to be directed by the events and circumstances of life and let the river of life take you wherever it's going or you can have both your hands on the steering wheel and decide that you are in full control. You get to decide where you go. Although you can't control all the events of your life, you can always decide what the events mean to you and how you are going to respond. Whenever anything happens to you, you have to respond to it in order to create the outcome. Most people have fallen into the cultural hypnosis that just passes the responsibility on to someone else. This is why their lives feel out of control, because it is. They have not taken responsibility. You create your world. When you assume your responsibility you are in charge and this is an internal shift in your thinking and behaviour. Your psychology is not just a big part of your life but it is "everything." Winning and loosing in life is an internal game. By learning to control and direct your mind you get to choose what things mean and therefore you get to choose your response, also known as your responsibility. No one can ever give you responsibility. It is an internal process and a switch that only you can turn on or off. Being fully responsible doesn't mean you live in blame and self pity. It means that you live life from a place of power where you know that on some level you are fully responsible for what happened and you will be responsible for everything that is to come. Be careful how you utilize your past experiences. With responsibility comes a new emotional territory that reinvents your past. You want to use your past as a place to learn from and a place to pull pleasure from. Right, wrong or indifferent, there is a gift in there somewhere. You just need to find it. It's never too late to have a happy childhood – you have the ability (and response-ability) to find an empowering meaning in whatever life gives you. Responsibility means that you are in charge. You call the shots. Nobody and nothing is in control and to blame other than you. This is how you turn problems into opportunities and how an ordinary life becomes extraordinary. Helen Keller, who was both blind and deaf, said that life is either a daring adventure or nothing. What is it going to be for you? You can either let the environment steer your life or you can get behind the wheel and take responsibility for every aspect of your life. Life is one amazing adventure, but only if you perceive it as that. By being responsible you can take yourself anywhere you want to go because you are the only one who gets to steer your ship and direct the course. You can't control the wind but you can most certainly direct your sails.

         
     
         
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