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    Put wings on your dreams

     

    : We Need Dreams Dreams are important. Not the dreams you have when sleeping. I'm talking about the dreams you have for your future -- the dreams that keep you going -- the dreams that make each day worth living. Dreams Aren't Enough As important as dreams are, they arent enough. Why? Dreams don't take you where you want to go. A dream needs wings -- to become a tangible vision -- a passion that will take you where you REALLY want to be. Bethany Hamilton lives in Hawaii -- her passion is surfing -- her dream is to become a professional surfer. She spends every available minute in the water, even home-schooling so she can have more time to pursue her vision. At 8 years of age she entered her first major competition taking the division championships that year. Bethany's dream had become her passion -- a tangible vision. When Your Vision Is Attacked Bethany's vision was viciously attacked on Halloween morning, 2003, when she was 13 years old. Bethany was lying on her board -- left arm dangling in the cool water. She remembers a flash of gray, pressure, and a couple fast tugs. She also remembers watching the jaws of a 15-foot tiger shark cover the top of her board and her left arm. The shark was gone as fast as it appeared. So was her arm. What It Takes To Keep Your Vision Alive Fast thinking friends and surgery saved Bethany's life. Everyone -- including Bethany -- believed her surfing days were over. But within a week her vision returned -- she rejected the fear and thoughts of defeat. Less than 30 days after the attack Bethany was back in the water. Her family and friends were there to cheer her on. Her first attempts were failures. She struggled to push herself up with one arm and keep her balance. Her fear was that her dream would die in the water that day -- the shark victorious after all. Bethany pushed down her fears, gritted her teeth, and kept trying. And then it happened. Tears rolled down her face -- the crowd cheered -- she caught her first wave and rode it in. The Dream Takes Wing Only months after the vicious attack, Bethany amazed thousands by achieving the unimaginable -- taking 5th at the 2004 National Scholastic Surfing Association Nationals Championships. In September she struck again, winning the Open Women's Division of the NSSA's Hawaiian conference season opener. Having placed in the finals of the National Surfing Championships Bethany has secured a spot on USA's National Surfing Team. She has truly conquered her fears! Five Ways To Put Wings On Your Dreams Bethany's story shows how to put wings on your dreams: 1) Your dream must become your passion -- a tangible vision. 2) Everything you do needs to fuel your vision. 3) When your dream is attacked, face the adversity squarely and choose to overcome it with whatever it takes -- face your fears and do it anyway! 4) Make necessary adjustments -- regain your balance -- and keep your eyes on your goal. 5) Accept help when it comes -- with grace and gratitude -- let it fuel your vision. From Dream to Vision to Reality Bethany's vision overcomes her fear of sharks and her continued nightmares. Her story teaches how to create dreams with wings that push you toward your life-goals. Follow her example and your dreams will become reality, too.

         
    Re commit

     

    Any time we start something new it is exciting and we are very motivated and committed. As time goes by, however, the burst of enthusiasm can wane as the reality of how much work is going to be involved kicks in. When you find yourself slacking a little and not being as enthused about the new change or goal you are working towards, that isn't a sign to quit. It is a sign that it is time to re-commit. I am in the fourth month of my "New Program" of eating right and exercise. The first three months I was excited, enthused and rearing to go. However, I have found that the last month has been a tad more challenging and I have begun to slip a bit in my new exercise and eating habits. As I waned so did my results, which made me think it wasn't working. Closer examination revealed that it wasn't the system that wasn't working; any system will work if you work it. But, it isn't magic. It takes effort and, most of all, commitment. When I realized that my commitment had slipped I recommitted and got back on track. This is all part of the process and I don't see my temporary slide in commitment as a failure. I see it as an opportunity to strengthen my resolve and continue on the journey. The more you renew your commitment the stronger it will bemitment isn't a magic pill, take it once and you've got itmitment is something that needs to be tended to, adjusted and strengthened. I have begun to renew my commitment every day, which helps to remind me how much I really want to make this change work and stick. You might not have to renew your commitment as often, but it does pay to check in and see where you are on the commitment scale. If you notice that you are not where you want to be with your goals it might just be that it is time to renew your commitment.

         
    Reducing fear of driving with proper breathing

     

    Those that experience anxiety, fear, or panic while driving often report an inability to breathe normally. They may have a feeling of being unable to take a deep breath, as if they’re throat or chest were closing in. They may find themselves gasping and gulping for air or with fears of having a heart attack or lung disorder. Fears of losing control may present themselves stemming from the inability to control one’s own breathing. All of these situations are common with the panic that ensues from a fear of driving and cause discomfort and more advanced symptoms, but none are physically dangerous. The goal in learning to breathe properly is not to prevent suffocation or any physical problem, which won’t occur anyway, but to prevent the uncomfortable sensations that result from breathing in this manner. Fortunately, these breathing difficulties can be remedied using simple techniques. The act of over breathing, or hyperventilating, results in the body taking in far too much carbon dioxide than is needed. Take a look at just some of the symptoms caused by hyperventilation and see if they look at all familiar: • Racing heart • Heartburn • Dizziness • Vision disturbances • Numbness or tingling in extremities • Difficulty in swallowing • Muscular shaking • Chest pain • Sensations of chocking • Sweating You may be surprised to know that all of the above sensations of anxiety experienced when driving can be attributed to how you breathe. Learning to breathe in a new way can reduce or eliminate a wide range of complaints associated with the fear of driving. Hyperventilation is not always as obvious as we are lead to believe by the television, where a person is gasping for air and having a paper bag over the mouth (to slow the rate of exhaled carbon dioxide). Hyperventilation is much more subtle and the person experiencing it is often unaware they are over breathing. Only a small change in the mix of oxygen to carbon dioxide can cause pronounced symptoms and additional anxiety. Holding the breath also results in the same list of symptoms. One of the most widely taught methods of proper breathing is controlled, diaphragmatic breathing. It has been widely known that people with general anxiety, or those subjected to a phobia tend to breathe from their chest (thoracic) and not their stomach (diaphragmatic). It’s easy to tell where you are breathing from, simply place one hand on your navel and the other on your chest, right over the breastbone. We're going to use your hands will tell you what muscles you are using to breathe. As you breathe, pay attention to which hand is rising and falling. If it’s mostly the hand on your chest, you aren’t breathing from your diaphragm and need to work on teaching your body to breathe properly. If it’s only the hand on your belly moving, then you’re breathing well. This check should be used again when you feel anxious to ensure you maintain your breathing pattern. If you are skeptical about the correct way to breathe, simply look at the way a baby or dog breathes. They breathe in a relaxed manner with their bellies moving up and down, their chest stays still. If you need to correct your breathe, below is a basic exercise that should be done as often as possible to retrain yourself. With enough work you’ll actually move your unconscious breathe from the upper lung to the lower lung. This experience greatly reduces anxiety and the physical symptoms of tension. 1) Again, place one hand on your navel, and the other on your chest, right over the breastbone. 2) Exhale completely. Drop your shoulders and relax your muscles, as you do so pay particular attention to the muscles of your face and upper body. 3) Pause for three seconds. 4) Inhale SLOWLY through your nose by pushing your stomach out, not your chest. Visualize yourself breathing in and out through your navel. Your chest hand should stay relatively stationary, while your lower hand rises and falls. There is also a more advanced breathing technique that can help you in the midst of an anxiety or panic attack that actually plays a role in eliminating the fearful feelings. The Driving Fear program does an excellent job of teaching the strategy to assist those that suffer from anxiety, panic, or phobias related to the fear of driving or specific driving situations such as highway driving or driving over bridges.

         
    Replace the negatives in your life with positives and move your life ahead

     

    If you want to move your life ahead, you should replace the negatives in your life with positives. This article will show you how to take the negative influences in your life away and replace them with positives, so you will have increases in morale, and productivity. Focus on the positive for success and peak performance. Most of us are not aware of the amount of negative influences in our lives. We are bombarded with negative messages from the media, the people around us, and most damaging of all, ourselves. The first step in the process in replacing negatives with positives in your life is to make a decision to start looking for the negative messages and ways to replace them with positives. Decide that you will focus on the positive in this world. Begin to drastically cut down on the amount of news you take in. Most people start their day with the news. And of course most of the news is bad news, fires, floods, etc. Then it is on to traffic and weather, which also stresses the negatives. So by the time you have finished your coffee, you have had enough bad news to last a week. Does all this bad news make you want to throw open the door and greet the new days, no quite the opposite. And how about the way we end the day? Many of us watch the news before going to bed and get a big dose of negative information just before trying to go to sleep. Is it any wonder so many people have trouble sleeping? The mood we are in before we go to sleep carries over to the next morning, so you are setting yourself up for starting the next day in a bad mood. Odds are you don’t need all that negative information you are taking in from the news, and you will function just fine without it. Replace the news you were taking in with such things as, motivational tapes, uplifting music and sites such as happynews, that stress good news. Also reading empowering books helps a great deal. Books can be a fantastic way to recharge your life. Look for success stories, biographies of successful people, etc and see what works for you. You will begin to feel better right away. Your next step is to limit the amount of TV you watch. A recent study showed that 78% of the people watching TV, are not interested in the program they are watching at any given time. So watching TV is probably making you bored at best, and taking you away from actives that would be more fun. Prime time is the period when most people are watching TV; you can make it your prime time by turning off the TV and using that time to move your life ahead. Next you need to limit your exposure to negative people. Most people don’t realize how draining it is to be around negative people, but they drain your energy and spirit in many ways. Negative people pull you down, so work to remove them from your life to the extent you can. Never get involved in the office pity party, or complaint sessions that come your way. Seek out people that support you and that you feel good being around and use these people to replace the negative people in your life. The most damaging source of negativity is ourselves. Most of us generate lots of negative self talk that our minds accept as the truth and results in our being held back in many ways. We focus on our shortcomings, our problems, and spend our time predicting more bad news for ourselves, generating lots of fear and worry, while undercutting our ability to try new things, etc. Begin to focus on the positive aspects of you. What are your unique strengths, what have you accomplished, how are you different and better than other people? Use visualization and affirmations to build images of yourself accomplishing the things you want and use these to replace the negative images. Give yourself lots of credit for everything you do right, so you are getting even more positive news about yourself. Also, set aside three minutes every day to think about all the good things you have in your life right now. The process of thinking of the good things in your life, will generate good feelings for you that will last much of the day. Don’t forget to take care of your body. Eat healthy, cut out some bad habits, and get regular exercise in order to boost your self-esteem while building your strength and endurance, so you can accomplish more. Helping others will also help you feel better about yourself. Take time to get involved in a charity, animal shelter, or other activates that help others. You will get good feedback from others and develop a genuine sense that you are a good person. What you put out comes back to you, so make sure it is good that goes out. By replacing the negatives in your life, with positives, you will make yourself and probably the world a better place. You will feel better mentally and physically, plus accomplish many of the things you wanted to. Nothing is ever accomplished without action, so start now to move your life ahead.

         
    Roar with confidence

     

    I am back, after a few days of vacationing with family. Weather was awesome, the beach was full of nasty jelly-fish, yuk! All-in-all, life has been good. I hope life has been as good for all of you. Well I will start this article out by telling you that I did ROAR with CONFIDENCE when I was on vacation. I went to the beach several times and trust me, to walk the beach and play with a child and race her in nothing more than a small bathing suit, is a total ROAR for this girl. We seem to be constantly looking for an easy way out to gain confidence. I hate to share this reality check people, but confidence is something that we already have and have always had since our cute little butts were spanked at birth. Look no further, I have looked up the dictionary meaning of CONFIDENCE for your minds to grasp, here it is: confi-dence...1. full trust:belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing. 2.belief in oneself and one`s powers or abilities: self-confidence: self-reliance, assurance which implies faith in oneself. As you can see there, it is all inside of your head. You must belief in you. First and foremost, you must trust you and your abilities to survive with greatness and good feelings about who you are, what you look like, how you think, how you love, how you deal with unexpected events, but most of all how you continue to build your inner confidence, even when the going gets tough. There are so many outer elements that continue to test our inner confidence, that it's no wonder we scramble at the best of times to smile, when we just want to scream. I have spoken of a few throughout my blogs: television, videos, reality shows, climbing of the "corporate ladder", society`s constant attack on aging, over weight people, and please do not forget about the children. Children are faced with fears that threaten their confidence all the time. They fear their parents will look down on them for not having the best grades. They fear their peers will toss them to the curb if they do not follow. They hear continuously how messed up their world has become, and how it is teaching them negative things. How can that not weaken their CONFIDENCE. It would kill mine. I'm just happy that I was strong enough to know the difference between WWF wrestling, cartoons and real life. To ROAR with CONFIDENCE is as effective as telling the world to BITE ME! I love to say that as you all know.(winks) CONFIDENCE is not easy to keep strong, when we feel threatened inside, or we feel our relationship is being threatened. We immediately feel it is us, that are at fault, which in turn strikes down our confidence. We need to trust in ourselves, trust that we know what we want and what is good for us. Your life is not suppose to be a debate on how you should fit in, or whether someone tells you how to look or feel about you. You are your life. Your lack of confidence removes you from who you are meant to be. Trusting and having CONFIDENCE in you does not mean that you will always be right about things, but it does give you strength to overcome your doubts, low self-esteem and correct your wrongs and rise above the lesser you. I sometimes wonder why people do what they do. Is it because they lack confidence and feel that any type of attention will build their self-esteem? Or is it that they truly just do not care anymore and let themselves be the joke of the moment? I have the seen women in internet porn.(research purposes only) Now this is my opinion, so bear with me here: I am in no way judging anyone, but I do want to reach out to them and tell them there are better ways to build up confidence and feel wanted and appreciated. For the women that fall into the prostitution world and feel that is the only way to stardom; when did they lose their respect and self-esteem and when did they become afraid to ROAR with CONFIDENCE? Women that have been scorned and throw themselves away literally to the bar scene, where they become a piece of meat and are treated worse than a dog, you know that you are not happy there and that those roads to better feelings are not the right roads. How can one respect themselves if they have no strength to ROAR with CONFIDENCE? I cry for all women that have fallen into the traps of feeling that attention will bring them higher. They will never find their freedom to ROAR with CONFIDENCE if they continue to depend on anything or anyone outside of themselves to get them there. You need to save yourselves. You stay in negative environments where you feel threatened because you need so much acceptance that you have been mislead to believe that it will strengthen your CONFIDENCE. You were born with what you need to save you! DO NOT wait for help. Help yourself. Do not cry to be rescued, it will not happen. YOU and you alone, have to make that climb. Just trust your feelings and follow them. Trust that you alone, can give yourself all the strength to ROAR with CONFIDENCE. I am hoping, that through my website and these written thoughts, that some women out there will wake up and see that they are unique without all the negative attention they feel is the way. Just be YOU! You can only be your best as being you. Not by following someone else`s standards, but only fulfilling your own. Love you first and most. Strive to ROAR with CONFIDENCE and DO NOT let anyone take you down. You are you, and that in itself is a very special gift that no one else has. The more I believe in me, the easier it is for me to grow stronger inside and fight all the negative elements that I come across day after day. Life is not easy, nor does it come with any promises. As I have said so many times, "What does not kill you, will only make you stronger". Live those words people and I mean it when I say it, " ROAR with CONFIDENCE". It truly is a feel good tip. (ROARZ) I seek myself in everything I do. I find myself. I dream my dreams wherever I go. I become myself. I ROAR with CONFIDENCE! Dorothy Lafrinere Owner/Operator Website - womensselfesteem Weblog - justblogme/Dorothy Forum - womenselfesteem. proboards29.com email - [email protected]

         
    Self motivation how to keep yourself motivated

     

    Keeping one’s self going is a difficult thing to do. There are a million distractions that occur every day and that can mean that we do not stay on track with what we should be doing. Self-motivation is something that does not come easy to a lot of people and that means that there are some steps that need to be taken before you can become motivated to the fullest extent. Of course there are some other matters that first need to be taken care of. If there are a lot of distractions that keep you from doing what you need to be doing then you need to make some changes. This is really the first step towards becoming self-motivated in any form. To be self-motivated means that there is no outside force or person pushing you to become what you want. The whole concept of succeeding lies within yourself and that means that you will need to make the effort yourself to be who you want to be. The doing away with the distractions means that you need to be completely self-reliant. If you have many distractions then you will not be getting the things done that need to be so you are not being self-motivated in that sense. Take the effort to make sure that you are completely absorbed in what you are doing, especially when it comes to work. This will mean that everything else takes a back seat and you are working to the best of your ability. If you are a person that needs a push to get going on something then you will need to devise a plan to become self-motivated. If you are one that requires the motivation then you will need to be sure to have something nearby that reminds you of what you need to be doing. For instance, a photograph depicting an event will be sure to move you along whenever you look at it. The same goes for a saying by a famous person that has succeeded in the way that you wish to succeed. To be self-motivated is to be the one person that gets it done without having to be told to do so. Moving along through the ranks and being the one person that succeeds where others fail is above all the rest. Take the time to become self-motivated and you will be much happier with yourself to say the least.

         
    Self hypnosis tune your mind to win

     

    There is a saying that winning and losing are two sides of a coin. All of us would like to be a winner in all our endeavors, but unfortunately very few of us succeed. But there are some people who always turn out to winners. All of us know someone who always is a winner. Whatever they do, anything they attempt, they meet with success. Be it business, playing a game of cards, finding a date or even if they were to enter the Olympics…hey presto! They are the winners. You know for sure that they’ll win against the odds and find their pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Its like they just wouldn’t accept anything but victory. All we do is admire them and wonder how they do it time after time. Have you ever wondered why winners always win and losers always lose? Perhaps you would like to be let into their little secret. Winners EXPECT only winning. That’s the catch! Sounds pretty simple. Well it is. Now pause and take a minute to think…. a winner foresees his success. He knows he’s the one who’ll win. He has tuned his mind to win. Most of you have run a race sometime or the other in your lives. What was your mindset before the race? Did you think you’d win before you ran the race or did you contemplate winning only when you were in the race? Perhaps you hadn’t even thought positively and had already seen yourself as a loser. Whether they are dealing in real estate or buying a car or just about anything, a winner EXPECTS to get exactly what he wants. Even for the Olympics, you bet they’d bag the gold hands down. And they do. And sometimes they do it against all odds. It is this EXPECTATION that makes one a winner, scoring over the rest. There are many athletes who have won against all odds. If we just look around us we can see people who win all the time. Do you also want to be a winner? What you have to do is… Keep your eyes closed and imagine you have a particular aspiration in life. Relax and concentrate. Let your mind focus only on the fact you are going to achieve your aim. Now, shut your eyes once more and EXPECT that YOU WILL achieve your target. Observe a subtle change. Do you not feel more confident? That’s the difference between letting our mind ponder and waver too much about anything. Perhaps you can win or lose. But the EXPECTATION has only one likelihood…. winning. You are almost there. The answer now lies before you. So what do you do next? Apply your mind with full intensity, concentrate on your goal and EXPECT TO WIN. Before any venture, just take a deep breath, relax and pause…. to think and ….TO WIN. Think of the aura of success around you. Bask in that glory of success. Now that you have set your mind on winning, you are surely going to be a winner. Everything you are going to do or say will spell triumph. Now that you know the path to winning, the rest is easy. And the chances are you WILL win. One hundred percent. All you require is mindset to win.

         
    Self motivation secrets

     

    : We all have a lack of self motivation at times. We can learn a hundred ways to improve our lives, but then hesitate to act. Something less important catches our attention, or we just don't feel like doing what we need to do. Even a person who is normally highly motivated can sometimes have a hard time getting started on an important task. Is there a solution? There are probably dozens of them. Below are six of the best self motivation techniques that consistently work when used. Try them all, but if you find even one or two here that work for you, you'll be on your way. Self Motivation Techniques That Work 1. Talk to get motivated. One of my favorite ways to create energy and motivation is to talk. Once I tell my wife about the article I'm going to write, I'm out of my slump and back at the keyboard. For less inspiring tasks, talk about the larger goals it will help you achieve. 2. Stimulate your desire. Seeing their potential future motivates many to sign up for get-rich-quick plans. The really good salesmen can put you in your imagined dream home in minutes, and make you feel motivated to do anything to make it real. Learn to be your own salesman. 3. Stimulate your pain. One Neuro-Linguistic Programming technique is to mentally link pain with not acting. It is like when finally stop hitting that snooze button on the alarm, and get up because you think you might lose your job. Just imagine any bad consequences that may occur if you don't do what you need to do. 4. Find a true interest. If you have no interest in what you are doing, it might mean you need to do something else. If it's just a task you dislike, but it needs to be done, relate it clearly in your mind to the greater goal. I don't like to drive, but I don't have a motivation problem when I'm driving to the mountains for a vacation. 5. Boost your energy. You need energy for self motivation. Coffee may help for a while, if caffeine doesn't create other problems for you. Exercising and sleeping well help too. Yo should also watch out for sugary foods. The "sugar blues"kill motivation. Once you find energy boosters that work for you, make a list and keep it handy for future use. 6. Take any small step. I've found if I commit to raking up one bag of leaves, I soon want to finish all the yard work. Taking any small step towards your goals is a great self motivation technique. To make this even easier, break larger goals down into small steps. Motivation techniques really do work, but don't ask me how to get motivated to use them. In any case, you were motivated enough to read this far, so you'll be fine. Oh, and humor is number seven. A good laugh can overcome that feeling of being overwhelmed that sucks away self motivation.

         
    So you want to win the lottery

     

    If we all got everything we wanted, most of us would have won the lottery by now. So what happens when we notice that we aren't getting what we want, even when we've been using Law of Attraction to manifest a particular desire for an extended period of time? Wanting to win the lottery is a clear desire, therefore, you need to use Law of Attraction deliberately. If you're not getting evidence that your desire to win the lottery is manifesting, then you need to review the Law of Attraction formula and check to see if all three conditions for Deliberate Attraction are being met. All desires you may have, for example, attracting an ideal mate, an ideal client base, ideal health or an ideal abundance of money require these same three conditions. Step 1: Clearly identify your desire Step 2: Raise your vibration (Give Your Desire Attention) Step 3: Allow it So let's examine these three conditions with respect to manifesting a winning lottery ticket. Step 1: Clearly identify your desire (You bought a ticket and you WANT to win.) Step 1 is done. Step 2: Raise your vibration (You talk about and daydream about all the things you'll do with the money you win.) Step 2 is done. If the only thing we needed to do is Step 1 and Step 2, most people would have everything they've ever become excited about. So as you observe that you've NOT attracted what you've been desiring (in this case, a winning lottery ticket), you'll need to check the three step process to find out what step needs your attention more often. In most cases it's Step 3 - Allowing. Allowing is the absence of doubt. Doubt is a negative vibration that cancels out the positive vibration of your desire, so removing doubt will allow your desire to come to you. Removing doubt will speed up the manifestation of your desire. One of the best tools for removing doubt is to start keeping a log or journal of all the ways in which you are attracting more abundance into your life, thus, you are finding proof! Abundance is simply energy and the more often you discover that you are aligned with the energy of abundance, the more often you will be removing doubt that you are Allowing your desire to win the lottery. For example, if you find money or someone buys you lunch or you find a great sale on an item you want to buy-this is all evidence that you are in alignment with abundance. Logging this evidence or tracking it in a journal will help you prove to yourself that you are aligning yourself more and more with abundance. In short, how soon you'll win the lottery is determined by how much doubt you have about winning, and winning is all about removing that doubt thereby aligning yourself with the energy of abundance.

         
    Sometimes typhoons come

     

    Tonight half of southern Japan is hunched down awaiting the arrival of the typhoon. This is #15 for the Pacific region this year, and the third one in about six weeks to come our way. By the way, if you're not quite sure what a typhoon is, it's the Asian name for tropical storms or hurricanes. Our little town of about 18,000 has only one industry -- its white beach -- and it waits all year for the two hottest summer months when hundreds of thousands of vacationers come from all over Japan to lie in the sun and play in the peaceful little bay. And this particular night, the town had planned its annual fireworks display. They have something called "Message Fireworks" where a visitor pays up to a hundred dollars for somebody to read an announcement of his undying love just before a volley of fireworks are fired off. This one event raises many thousands of dollars for the town. In addition, the local merchants make a sizeable part of their yearly profit during the summer months. But tonight the beach is dark. No fireworks will dazzle the crowds tonight. No concession booths will sell snacks, and no families will congregate to enjoy the summertime display. All those plans. All the money invested in food, in merchandise, in giant fireworks that shoot two hundred meters into the air. So when a typhoon comes -- and no amount of "positive thinking" will stop it happening from time to time -- the merchants here just sigh, suck it up, and go to Plan B, which is to try again tomorrow night. And if that doesn't work, then next weekend. You see, they've seen it all before. They know that sometimes things WILL get in the way of their plans. So they stay flexible. They have contingencies, Plan B's and even Plan C's. Now, the point I'm making is not that weather is a doggone nuisance. Instead, I invite you to consider one question: how flexible are you prepared to be? (The operative word is "prepared".) When stuff happens -- and it will -- what's your Plan B and your Plan C? Don't have one? Then shouldn't you think about getting one? Because stuff WILL happen. That's just the way life brings you special opportunities you never expected, never imagined, and never wanted. But once life brings it on, you need to be prepared to deal with it. Like a boy scout, you need to be prepared with backup plans. But to have a backup plan, you first need a main plan. And of course you've got one of those... right?

         
    Staff and employess motivation

     

    As a person with a position of decision making it is critical to provide direction to employees through staff motivation. Staff motivation is seldom an easy task as it involves working with a number of personalities & who come from different personal situations that can sometime be brought into they workplace. it is important to realize that all employees have outside factors in their day to day lives & this in turn can effect your staff motivation, as a leader it is your duty to keep your staff motivation high which in turn will provide a more efficient workplace. Staff motivation is an integral part of corporate America, that cannot be overlooked by decision makers & leaders of companies. To get the most out of your employees it is critical to keep staff motivation high, as this leads to higher productivity throughout an organization. Learn some tips to keep your staff motivation at an optimal level. When properly used staff motivation can be a vital tool to get the most out of your employees. it is important for people in the position of decision making to let your employees know when they do a nice job by using positive words, as this will benefit the entire company through a total team effort. But simultaneously employees must know that with reassurance comes high expectations & it will be up to them to meet those expectations, staff motivation can accomplish this task. To get the most out of your employees, be sure to balance workloads in a fair & honest manner. Playing favorites can be counter productive to your staff motivation, so its important to consider that all employees are held in the same respect & on an even playing ground. There will be times when you do find yourself favoring six employee over another but to get the most our of your employees & to keep staff motivation high it is important try minimize this. Staff & employees require to know that they are doing a nice job or else staff motivation will suffer. When you staff knows that they have done a nice job & you've clearly indicated this through a positive but firm tone not only shows your commitment as a leader but also shows your compassion resulting in a boost of staff motivation. Public recognition is always a great tool to boost your staff recognition by letting your employees know they are doing a nice job. Nothing feels better you boss publicly acknowledging a job well done, it is important to let your employees know this to keep staff motivation high. The best corporate mangers in America are always looking for ways to boost their staffs productivity. It takes hard work, patience, understanding & dedication to get the most out of your employees. Keeping your staff motivation & productivity high will be a measuring stick of your performance & success as a manager. improvising & adapting to situations are a few traits a manger must have to get the most out of employees keep staff motivation high & be productive as possible for the company as a whole.

         
    Start with a baseline

     

    Making changes in your life is great and it is the way we grow and develop as people. Change is a constant process and part of being human. When you embark on changing anything in your life you have to start from where you are. Until you know where that is it would be difficult to effectively make the change. You have to start with a baseline. Starting with a baseline is about honestly figuring out where you are and what you are doing so that you know exactly what needs to be changed. It may sound odd, but many of us are unaware of what we do. When my clients tell me they want to lose weight the first thing I do is have them keep a food journal for a week just to get a baseline. The next week they share how shocked they were to see not only how much they were eating, but also what they were eating. Many of us are on autopilot and we simply are not aware of what we are doing. When you track it - and this works with anything - you have a real picture of where you are and what needs to change. I read a statistic once that said most people consistently spend about 10% more than they make. I believe that is true, and it is because what is being spent, especially on a credit card, is not tracked. I once had a client that just didn't have enough time to accomplish everything she needed to do. When she tracked her time for a week she was made painfully aware that she was spending hours in front of the television. The first step in change is awareness. You have to become aware of what you are doing and exactly where you are before you can proceed forward. Keeping track for a week or two will provide you with valuable information that will support your change effort. Before you embark on any type of change effort you have to know where you are. I liken it to those travel maps that have an X printed next to "You are here." Until you are aware of exactly where you are - and many of us don't have a clue - it will be impossible to make the needed change. The first step in your change effort is to determine where you are. Keep a log for a week or two. This will give you a realistic idea of what you are doing. You can track anything from how much money you spend to how many hours of sleep you get. Once you know the truth about where you are you can proceed.

         
    Stay strong you can make it

     

    What is your deepest fear? I have heard the poem that asks this question in recent movies and it has touched me on a deep level. I watched the movie Akeelah and the Bee over this past week while watching cable and this poem was quoted. So many of us try and do what is simple and take the path of least resistance because it suits us. This journey of life is filled with many obstacles and road blocks. It is intended to be that way in order to make you into the exact you you are to be. Most people miss the opportunity to grow and give up and give in to pressure. A few years ago I preached a sermon at my fathers church in Mechanicsville, VA and I dealt with pressure. I said to the congregation that a diamond is one of the most valuable things that we have. It comes from a piece of coal. Well how is a diamond formed? It is formed by pressure. Every piece of coal does not become a diamond. Only the ones that stand up under pressure are able to be formed into this valuable stone. You need to be a diamond. Most people look externally to the reasons why they fail in life. In order for you to be just what God intends for you to be, you must stand against the pressure of life and come out on the other end as a diamond. The first line of that poem starts like this, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, it is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us, ..." When we are young, we have dreams and goals that are lofty. I say lofty because most people do not even believe that you will go after what you want. Let's face it, most people just wind up settling for what life throws at them instead of going out and getting what is rightfully theirs to begin with. You have a right, more than that a promise from God himself that you will be able to have peace, joy, and prosperity. We have these promises from our creator and we do not take full advantage of them. Why? Because when times get hard, most give up. You can not be a blessing to me if you do not do what God called you to do. You can not be a blessing to the world unless you stand the pressure and become a diamond. In part my success is dependent on you playing your part in the world. If Martin or Malcolm did not stand up, I would not be where I am today. If Harriet Tubman, Frederick Douglass, and other black leaders did not risk death, my freedom may have never come. If you do not do what you were created to do, who will you hold back? The bible says that wide is the way that leads to destruction. The path to Him is called strait (not straight). This word means hard or difficult. This path builds character. This path builds leaders. Stop looking at challenges as give up points. Look at them as the way to create something precious in you. You have everything you need inside of you to be a great person. Never give up because of circumstances. You can not grow with out some struggle.

         
    Success steps for your personal or business life

     

    Fact: Success is something of which we all want more. Fact: Most people believe that success is difficult. Fact: They’re wrong - it’s not! Success isn’t really that difficult. There is a significant portion of the population here in North America, that actually want and need success to be hard! Why? So they then have a built-in excuse when things don’t go their way! Pretty sad situation, to say the least. For those of you who are serious about having more, doing more, giving more and being more, success is achievable with some understanding of what to do, some discipline around planning and execution of those plans and belief that you can achieve your desires. The Truth About Success The first thing to remember about success is that it is a process – nothing more, nothing less. There is really no magic to it and it’s not reserved only for a select few people. As such, success really has nothing to do with luck, coincidence or fate. It really comes down to understanding the steps in the process and then executing on those steps. There are basically six key areas to higher achievement. Some people will tell you there are four while others may tell you there are eight. One thing for certain though, is that irrespective of the number of steps the experts talk about, they all originate from the same roots. From my perspective then, here are the six key steps: 1. Making the decision 2. Clarity - developing the Vision 3. Focus – having a plan 4mitment – understanding the price and having the willingness to pay that price 5. Belief – believing in yourself and those around you 6. Taking action – practice Ready, Fire, Aim… Making the Decision If success is a process with a number of defined steps, then it is just like any other process. So, what is the first step in any process? Making a decision to do something – this is the first step. We all know that nothing moves until someone makes a decision. The first action is always in making the decision to proceed. This is a fundamental step, which most people overlook. So, make the decision to move forwardmit your decision to paper, just to bring it into focus. Then, go for it! Clarity Having clarity of purpose and a clear picture of what you desire, is probably the single most important factor in achievement. Why is Clarity so important? Without clarity, you send a very garbled message out to the Universe. We know that the Law of Attraction says that we will attract what we focus on, so if we don’t have clarity, we will attract confusion. Consider the following analogy: You are going on a cruise, but when the ship sets sail, you discover it has no rudder. What happens? One of 3 things will occur: 1. You will sail along until you collide with an immovable object, after which you will sink to the bottom 2. You will run aground and become hopelessly stuck in the mud 3. You will drift aimlessly until you arrive back at the original dock Trying to go through life without clarity is similar to sailing a rudder-less ship – no good thing can or will happen! The sad thing is the majority of people have no clue about what they truly want. They have no clarity. When asked the question, responses will be superficial at best, and at worst, will be what someone else wants for them. So how do we get clarity? Simply by asking ourselves lots of questions: What do I really want? What does success look like to me? Why do I want a particular thing? How will this achievement change my life? How can I use this success to make a difference for others? Introspection is the trick. Understand what you want, why you want it and what it will do for you. This is a critical factor, and as such, is probably the most difficult step. For this reason, most people never complete this aspect – then wonder why life is so difficult! Once you have a clear understanding of what you want, it is critical that you engage in goal setting – specifically setting SMART goals. SMART is an acronym for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time Sensitive - S-M-A-R-T. Knowing what you want and setting SMART goals as mileposts on your quest cannot help but give you clarity! Focus Focus is having the unwavering attention to complete what you set out to do. There are a million distractions in every facet of our lives. Telephones and e-mail, clients and managers, spouses and kids, TV, newspapers and radio – the distractions are everywhere and endless. Everyone wants a piece of us and the result can be totally overwhelming. So, how can we stay on course with all the distractions in our lives? Willpower is a good start, but it’s very difficult to stay on track simply through willpower. The best way is to develop and follow a plan. Start with your goals in mind and then work backwards to develop the plan. What steps are required to get you to the goals? Make the plan as detailed as possible. Try to visualize and then plan for, every possible setbackmit the plan to paper and then keep it with you at all times. Review it regularly and ensure that every step takes you closer to your Vision and Goals. If the plan doesn’t support the vision then change it! Along with your plans, you should consider developing an action orientation that will keep you motivated to move forward at all times. This requires a little self-discipline, but is a crucial component to achievement of any kind. Before starting any new activity, ask yourself if that activity will move you closer to your goals. If the answer is no, you may want to reconsider doing it at that time. I coach my clients to practice the 3 D’s – Defer, Delegate or Delete. Can the particular activity be done later? Defer it! Can it be done by someone else? Delegate it! Does it need to be done at all? If not, consider deleting it! Posing these questions will help to keep you focused on what is truly important! Commitment Commitment is something that comes from understanding that everything has its price and then having the willingness to pay that price. This is important because nobody wants to put significant effort into something, only to find out after the fact that the price was too high. The price is something not necessarily defined as financial. It could be time, effort, sacrifice, money or perhaps, something else. The point is that we must be fully aware of the price and be willing to pay it, if we want to have success. Belief This is perhaps the single biggest obstacle that all of us must overcome in order to be successful. We all carry a lot of baggage, thanks to our upbringing. The majority of people carry with them, an entire series of self-limiting beliefs that will absolutely stop, and hold them back from, success. Things like “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not smart enough”, “I’m not lucky enough”, and the worst, “I’m not worthy” are but a few of the self-limiting beliefs I have encountered. We carry them with us like rocks in a knapsack, and then use them to sabotage our success. So, how twisted is that?!?! The old expression is absolutely true – whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right! One of the main areas that I work on with my clients is shedding these non-supportive beliefs and replacing them with beliefs that will help them to accomplish their desires. It is truly amazing the damage that we, as parents, can inflict on our children. So why do we do it? For the most part, we don’t do it intentionally or with malice. In the majority of cases, the cause is a well-meaning but unskilled or un-thinking parent, who says the wrong thing at the wrong time, and the message sticks – as simple as that! And it's not just parents that are the cause - teachers, friends, clergy members or anyone else that has influence in a child's life can be a contributor to these self-limiting beliefs! The bottom line is that we must shed the bad and replace with good beliefs. Taking Action “Nothing changes until something moves” – this is the battle cry of author and journalist Robert Ringer. And he is absolutely correct. Not all of the decision-making, clarity, planning, focus and belief in the world, will get you to where you want to be, without taking action! Action – putting your plans into play – that is what will get you to the destination. Don’t get caught in the paralysis of analysis, or in the conundrum of Ready, Aim, Aim, Aim, Aim… Get the oars in the water and start rowing. Execution is the single biggest factor in achievement, so the faster and better your execution, the quicker you will get to the goals! Conclusion So, there you have it; the six steps that will help you to the fabled land of achievement and success! You now have the opportunity to push ahead and reach your potential. No more excuses - make the commitment to take action TODAY! Figure out what you want, put a plan together to achieve it, understand the cost, believe in yourself then go and get it!

         
    Survival

     

    Survival is one of the most demanding and challenging issues that we face as humans! Survival challenges us through many different issues such as: child abuse, sexual abuse, birth, death, job loss, health problems, low self-esteem, relationship ups and downs, parenting, deceptions, breakdowns, poverty, natural disasters, education, addictions and even our own desires to be strong. Survival comes in little packages and it comes in enormous boxes. It appears when we least expect it, never letting us prepare for the battle. It hides around corners, waiting to pounce on us. It is constantly testing our inner powers and strength. To live is to survive and without survival you have no life. Survival is a choice. If you choose to survive, you must fight hard. If you choose to not survive, you will die. Simple! Survival will change who you are many times. How you deal with your challenge and how drastic the challenge is will determine how much of yourself you manage to keep safe. A couple of common phrases that we run into many times in our day is, "Only the strong survive" and, "What does not kill us will only make us stronger". These are very good survival attitudes to practice. We need to be strong to survive. It takes pure GUTS to survive and move forward in any situation. It takes having total control of your thoughts, which is one of your best weapons in the battle of survival. It demands consistent striving to reach your goals, stopping at nothing to meet your destiny. I emphasize the importance of strength, when battling the war of survival. To be strong is: to be able to stand your ground and hold onto your inner beliefs, which will be your best strategy to win the game. to be born into the survival game without knowledge or understanding of the rules, and still overcome all the obstacles. to be able to clean the skeletons out of your closet that have been haunting you from your past. to take control of your life and deal with the monsters, whether it be through telling a story or confronting the monster face to face. to be able to look back at the reasons for your pain and suffering and wave at it as if it were just a car going by. to be able to smile at a happy memory of a loved one that was taken from you without reason. to be able to say NO to drugs and misuse of alcohol. to be able to forgive, forget and let the waters flow under the bridge. to feel physical pain every minute you are awake, yet be able to smile and ease that pain with positive thoughts. to look in the mirror and know you are the best, and to believe who you are. to let go of hate and resentment, when your heart has been deceived or broken. to push forward when all the negative forces feel like they are pushing you backwards. to continue tearing down walls of negative thinking, and replace them with positive openness. to open your heart to another after it was forced to close. to keep searching for answers to a better you, even when all you want to do is quit. to look to tomorrow for the sunshine, when the rain refuses to stop. to give birth to a child, and raise him/her with love and respect. to embrace growing old and never regretting it. to study hard and achieve all the knowledge that the world has to offer you. to not allow the material world to confuse you as to what is really important in life to be a hugger, not a judger. to smile when you want to cry. to Live, Love and Laugh. ******************************************************** "We are driven by five genetic needs: survival, love and belonging, power, freedom, and fun." William Glasser "Love and kindness are the very basis of society. If we lose these feelings, society will face tremendous difficulties; the survival of humanity will be endangered." Dalai Lama Dorothy Lafrinere Owner/Operater Website - womensselfesteem Weblog - justblogme/Dorothy Forum - womenselfesteem. proboards29.com email - [email protected]

         
     
         
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